80 worst songs of the 80s: The Top 10

At last, the top 20 songs from 80 worst songs of the 80s. Don't come looking for me if you start humming these all day long. George and Andrew to the left there are just trying to suck up in hopes they're not tops on the list. (Why does George look like Hilary Swank in that photo?)

(Click here to see 11-20, 21-30, 31-40, 41-50, 51-60, 61-70 and  71-80).

By the way, our Stuck in the 80s podcast this week is also about the worst songs of the 80s. Click here to download it or click here to subscribe to us for free on iTunes.

And now... the final 10:

10. Walking on Sunshine (Katrina and the Waves)
Band reportedly was horrified that "Katrina" was the name of last year's killer hurricane.
"Now everytime I go for the mailbox, gotta hold myself down"

9. I Wanna Be a Cowboy (Boys Don't Cry)
A one-hit wonder by a British studio band, it topped out at No. 13 on the charts. One reader said "I was asked to turn off by a passenger in my car because it was so painful to listen to."
"My name is Ted. And one day I'll be dead -- yo yo"

8. Sunglasses at Night (Corey Hart)
Perhaps the most overplayed songs of the 80s (along with "Come On Eileen" and "Melt with You"), it's not even Hart's highest charting song -- Never Surrender is; along with "The Future's So Bright..." that makes two songs in the top 20 about wearing sunglasses.
"Don't switch the blade on the guy in shades, oh-no"

7. Fish Heads (Barnes and Barnes)
Fictional brothers Art and Artie Barnes are really artists Robert Haimer and Bill Mumy, who played Will Robinson in the TV series "Lost in Space." Though the song was recorded in 1978, it was released on the 1980 album Voobaha; made popular on the Dr. Demento radio show and Saturday Night Live.
"I took a fish head out to see a movie. Didn't have to pay to get it in"

   6. Don't Worry, Be Happy (Bobby McFerrin)
McFerrin creates his music using his vocal range of four octaves and by tapping on his chest to make the bass sounds; he also sang the theme song to the "Cosby Show."
"In every life we have some trouble. When you worry you make it double "

5. Everybody Have Fun Tonight (Wang Chung)
Originally called Huang Chung (Chinese for "perfect pitch"); the band also claims "Wang Chung" is a sound make by strumming a guitar; named 3rd worst song ever by Blender magazine and VH1.
"Across the nation, around the world. Everybody have fun tonight"

4. Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go (Wham!)
Song is based on a note left in George Michael's hotel room one night from band mate Andrew Ridgeley; popularity soared with the MTV showing the band wearing "Choose Life" t-shirts.
"Jitterbug into my brain. Goes a bang bang bang till my feet do the same"

3. Greatest Love of All (Whitney Houston)
Originally recorded by George Benson in 1977; one of several hit singles off her 1985 debut album; considering Houston's current state of life, the song's themes of self-preservation and dignity might seem ironic; mocked in "Coming to America" and "Say Anything."
"No matter what they take from me, they can't take away my dignity"

2. Hip To Be Square (Huey Lewis and the News)
Band was composed of backup musicians for Elvis Costello and Van Morrison; several other band tunes -- "Heart of Rock and Roll" and "I Want A New Drug" -- barely missed inclusion on this list.
"Don't tell me that I'm crazy. Don't tell me I'm nowhere. Take it from me. It's hip to be square."

1. We Are The World (USA For Africa)
It was the best of the 80s ... it was the worst of the 80s. Originally intended by Harry Belafonte to feature only black musicians; recorded same night as American Music Awards in 1985 to assure artists were available; eighth consecutive year that a Lionel Richie song reached No. 1. Sure, the song was for a good cause. But it wasn't even as good as "Do They Know It's Christmas" by the British artists, from which the idea was stolen. As one reader said, "We had to sing that at a school concert and it haunts me to this day."

"It's true we'll make a better day. Just you and me"

Comments

[Kendrick]

i need help on this please, im looking for an 80s disco song with the lyrics like these- Oh la loving day, time for holiday, oh my lucky night your... thanks for your help. i just love the disco songs of 80s.

[ggg]

Putting on the Ritz.

[liebe]

Sie haben eine schöne Seite!

[Wayne]

Nr. 54 "Ride Like The Wind" by Christopher Cross actually was released in 1979 technically making it a 70s song.

[chelsea3]

ok. 80's fans. I need your help. There is this song... I can't think of the name of it and I can't think of the words. But I'm DYING to hear it again. I heard it once several years ago and it was a blast from the past. It has some kind of native american sounding chants in it. It's something about children or light or earth or something and has lots of drums in it. got any ideas on how I can find it?

[Anonymous]

Okay, im going to have to argue with this one.. The crazy songs are part of the 80's!.. Thats what makes it the 80's! And for the record.. the only one that i agree with is the fish heads..Get a clue people..Would the 80's be the same without the cheesy music??

[Anonymous]

how could do that. there are too some good songs, i don't know who was the sucker who choose those songs,he(she) has no earsmorten 1986

[palinode]

Maybe I missed it, but Ray Parker Jr.'s "Ghostbusters" song deserves a spot on this list somewhere. I mean, Huey Lewis and the News sued over this song, claiming that it was a rip-off of "I Want a New Drug". A lame soundtrack cut that didn't even have enough originality to have its own tune? Quintessentially 80s.

[Matty Dread]

Don't you just love lists of "bests" and "worsts" complied by people who never WROTE a song, let alone held a musical instrument in their hands? Your qualifications for being arbitor of good taste is - what exactly? A high-speed internet connect? Now if you were to call this the "Most Over-Played Songs By the Morally and Intellectually Bankrupt Music Industry of the 1980's" you might have something. As it is - you trash a group of perfectly servicable pop songs - just because record execs handed out a ton of cocaine to get them flogged to death on the airwaves. What's next? Pick on the slow kids? Don't quit your day job!

[Anonymous]

I can't believe Charlene's I've Never been to Me didn't make your list, much less number 1

[Karl]

Chase Squires is insane. "Relax" is still an awesome song. How about: See chameleon (Lying there in the sun)All things to everyone (Run Runaway) That song was pretty awesome that one night when I was drinking grain alcohol and orange juice in a Lutz park in 1984. Yeah, Lutz.

[Ban the Habs and their fans!]

I love 80's music. I love the fact you had to know how to play guitar to be in a band in the 80's. (hence the gratuitous guitar solos) My # 1 didn't even make the list and i must assume it didn't because it didn't get the air play. the answer is: French kissing in the U.S.A. by Blondie.

[Mirrorball Man]

Quote:I think the 80's end in 1985 for Steve. That's why Mili Vanilli, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany aren't on the list.After that, nothing else matters... Am I right, Steve? As Steve remind us all before these are the choices of the people who emailed in ,not his personal choices.and for the record Tiffany was on the list.Some one said that late 80s doesnt count? Late 80s is still the 80s! Milli Vanilli , can they really be counted since they didnt sing anything on their own albums?I dont think hair metal got its fair share here and theres tons of crap there to be had...Like the person that was complaining about Poison (they definately belong on the list). C'mon we should try this again in 6 months and see what choices crop up then I bet we get something different.MM

[Christina]

I think the 80's end in 1985 for Steve. That's why Mili Vanilli, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany aren't on the list.After that, nothing else matters... Am I right, Steve?

[Mirrorball Man]

Hmmm.. Maybe my comments are more about the comments left than the songs themselves.For the person that wrote:Short list: Worst songs of the 80's?All of them. WTF? You're posting on an 80s blog.It's not our fault you grew up listening to Britney and Ashlee.Go back and find out what real music and artist are.I still think this is not the "cream of the crap" listI think we could do alot worse than these. I will admit though We Are The World , charity or not is utter crap.Bandi Aid rocks and is still one of my favorite Christmas tunes.Whitney Houston is and deserves to be in the top ten, doesnt matter what the song.What a frickin embarassment shes become and of her own doing ,Im afraid.Huey Lewis & The News ( a bar band made famous) This song was wretched then beyond an embarrasment now.The rest of their material is good though for what it is.(Though I dont own any of it).To the person that thought ABC and Human League should be in here..You havent a clue.MM

[Kurt Rambis]

I didn't see these two songs on the list but they definitely should be on it. They're so bad, you have to laugh. "Poison Arrow" by ABC, and "Keep Feeling Fascination" by the Human League. Check them out. I can't listen to them without cracking up. For true fans of the cheesiest 80s music. p.s.-note the short drum-machine solo in Poison Arrow...hilarious!

[M.R.]

"We Built This City" is, by far, the worst song of the 20th century, not just the decade of the 1980s. Milli Vanilli were so near the end of the 1980s thay they just don't count as an 80's act. But don't disrespect them: they were such amazing trend-setters that an entire generation of lip-syncing studio-produced garbage followed. Milli Vanilli -are- the godfathers of modern pop entertainment. If you don't believe me, ask Ashlee Simpson.

[Anonymous]

We sang "We are the World" at my "promotion" from elementary school to middle school. We actually practiced it for over a week before singing it to the whole audience of parents. It was horrible.

[Anonymous]

How can Milli Vanilli not be #1? At least the people on "We Are The World" sang their own lyrics. Not to mention made alot of money for a good cause.

[Anonymous]

Electric Avenue is primo 80s fools! die!!!

[Sherrie]

How's this for a classic 80's moment- at the 1987 Grad Night at Disney, I saw Wang Chung sing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" (which I have to argue is NOT one of the worst of the 80's) and "Dance Hall Days", then 30 minutes later I saw Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine do "Conga". Good times.Sherrie

[Anonymous]

"shout, shout, let it all out...:Night RangerAir SupplyThis is like shooting speed in a barrel-lee+++

[Anonymous]

uh oh...how did we miss "Pac Man Fever??"or "Tainted love"and anything by bette midler-lee+++

[noahproblem]

Well one thing is right - the ABSOLUTE WORST song of the 80's (and of all time, for that matter) is in this top 10.But it's in the wrong place - "Don't Worry Be Happy" (your #6) is the worst song by far.

[Chase Squires]

ack, Electric Avenue ... worst song ever ... except for .... Frankie Goes to Hollywood "Relax" ... Worst song ever recorded, and I'm including those monotone Gregorian chants and the bone-on-rock thumping of early cavemen .... Dude, no love for Huey Lewis?Man ....

[Anonymous]

Corey Hart did not record the godawful "The Future's so Bright, I gotta wear shades" -- blame Timbuk 3 for that

[Synthsational]

I will not let you disgrace the piece of song writing genius that was Sunglasses At Night by Corey Hart. Perhaps it's because i came fresh to the song in GTA: Vice City and didn't have to live through it being constantly repeated on radio, but i love the cool synth intro, the cheesy guitar solo and that drum machine... Then again, i was only alive for 11 months of the 80s so don't really have a right to comment

[Anonymous]

...Debbie Gibson? .... Tiffany? ...Samantha Fox? The FREAKIN' HONEYDRIPPERS!!!!!

[Daedalus]

You are right on with all of these songs! I can proudly boast that I own not a single one of them.damien p - your description of the canadian song makes me laugh and cringe at the same time!And to the poser who has a problem with the list - I hope to god I never have to go to a party with you.

[Bassnote]

I agree with everything except Huey Lewis & Corey Hart.

[Laz]

I hope the therapy is helping. It's OK to admit you dislike the songs because they sounded like crap at the bottom of a trash can. Maybe you can pretend your cool now. Somebody might agree. (If you paid them enough that is)You probably liked new Coke too.

[Anonymous]

Anyone who puts a novelty song on a "worst of" list (Barnes and Barnes, in this case) is missing the point of said song.

[Anonymous]

Opinions are like assholes, everyone's got one, and they all stink.

[Damian P.]

I meant Geddy Lee instead of Neal Peart, of course.

[Damian P.]

"We are the World" is bad. I can't argue with that. But if you lived up here in the land of Gino Vanelli, you were subjected to not only "We are the World", but the Canadian raise-money-for-Africans song, "Tears Are Not Enough", co-written by Bryan Adams.To my American friends: if you had the "We are the World" album (remember that?), you may know this one. If not, imagine something even schmalzier than "We are the World" with Adams, Corey Hart, Anne Murray, Neil Young, Neal Peart and several dozen other singers you've never heard of, fighting desperately to keep singing in the right key. But the coup de grace was the video, mostly filmed with all the artists in the studio, but for the big finish, all the players from an NHL all-star game got together in a big choir and belted it out. I am not making any of this up.Haven't these poor Africans suffered enough?

[Joe]

If you really think the eighties were that bad, one has to expect that people would think this stuff good after all that disco crap,but yes,it was still very bad considering all the good artists that were real, and not some lip-sync heavy produced rich guy belch

[Chuck]

Agreed with the exception of Huey Lewis. And it's STILL hip to be square, dorks.

[chilledbongo]

let's face it: looking back, everything sucked in the 80s.

[Anonymous]

Short list: Worst songs of the 80's?All of them.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, but "We Built This City" is by far the worst song in the history of recorded music. It will continue to be the worst song in the entire universe forever and all of eternity. I'd listen to Lou Reed's entire "Metal Machine Music" album before I listened to one minute of a Starship song.

[Theaterofthesoul]

Good lord, I HATED Electric Avenue. That's got my vote for worst song of the 80's.

[Anonymous]

Nope.You guys COMPLETELY missed it.The absolute WORST song of the 80's (and I think, perhaps, of all time) is:"Electric Avenue" by Eddy GrantMusical tripe that was played (I kid you not) every hour on the hour during its heyday.Bleah.

[Tylerre Potter]

What about the songs with the goddamned homo-roller-disco-beach-party -bubblegum-chewing synthesizers? They play about ten songs on repeat all day long, much much worse than any on this list. Also, please edit your sentences in the future, removing superflous s's.

[Anonymous]

Where did you live in the 80s where "Come On Eileen" and "Melt With You" were overplayed???They never even made it to radio in most of the country.

[Anonymous]

The author(s) of this list are so full of $h1t "like a whale with no ass".

[Anonymous]

OK, I have to agree with 95 percent of this list. But "We are the World" as the worst song? Not a chance. It's the feel good song of the decade.That said, I am glad that not one Adam Ant song made the top 80 worst songs list. "We're just following ancient history...if I strip for you, will you strip for me?"Johnny B. Goode

[Cerberus]

80's rock!

[Anonymous]

At the risk of appearing overly anal, the Wang Chung song was named "Everybody Have Fun Tonight," and the UK Band Aid song was called "Do They Know Its Christmas."Yes, I'm somewhat ashamed that I know that.

[Anonymous]

At least get the song titles right. It's "Everybody Have Fun Tonight", and "Do They Know it's Christmas".Doesn't exactly make you sound credible when you get two song titles wrong in the top 10.

[Anonymous]

Whats regretful is that the vast quantity of suck that is 'Everybody Wang Chung Tonight' overshadows the cool songs Wang Chung had like 'Dance Hall Days' and 'To Live and Die in L.A.'