Our sport, our field, our decade

High school football could have been king in the 80s. Seriously.

The best book ever written about it -- "Friday Night Lights" -- was published in 1989. (Why did it took so many years for it to make it to Hollywood and TV?)

And some of the best (and worst) movies ever about the sport were made in the 80s. The best one from any decade? I'll go with 2004's "Friday Night Lights" again, even though it's not nearly as good as the book or TV show -- how weird is that? And as much as I love to watch "Varsity Blues" every time it's on cable, it takes the title for least realistic sports movie since "Gus" -- the field-goal kicking mule. (Alas, it was made in '76.)

Now that the season is about to start again, how about a closer look at the best and worst of the bunch from the 80s.

THE BEST: All The Right Moves (1983)

Stars: Tom Cruise, Lea Thompson, Craig T. Nelson, Christopher Penn.

The plot: A football player and his coach look to escape the steel towns of Pennsylvania.

Realism factor: Aside from the fireworks going off when rival Walnut Heights scores a touchdown, I think it's fairly flawless. Craig Nelson is the embodiment of every high school coach I've ever met (he would of course later go on to prove this again in TV's "Coach.") And yeah, Tom, that WAS pass interference! Next time, go for the ball.

Favorite line: "You're not god, Nickerson. You're just a typing teacher."

THE WORST: Wildcats (1986)

Stars: Goldie Hawn, Wesley Snipes, Woody Harrelson, Nipsey Russell, Bruce McGill.

The plot: A female track coach accepts her dream job -- head football coach ... at the worst school in the city.

Realism factor: The female coach is possibly the only realistic angle to the entire movie. Otherwise, you have players break-dancing on the field (that's 15 yards unsportsmanlike conduct), profanity during the plays (another 15 yards and possible ejection) and a 400-pound player jumping high enough to block a field goal. (No flag, but come on!)

Favorite line: "If you're going to shake my hand, I'd rather do you did that before you checked his jock."

THE GUILTY PLEASURE: The Best of Times (1986)

Stars: Robin Williams, Kurt Russell.

The plot: Two men seek to turn their lives (and the fortune of their town) around by replaying an important game from their high school days.

Realism factor: You wouldn't ask how realistic "Field of Dreams" is, would you? Same deal here. Just enjoy the shot at redemption (and secretly wish it could happen to you as well.)

Favorite line: "I was lucky." "No Jack, you were due."

Comments

[Johnny B. Goode]

That's 15 yards for unnecessary roughness against Goldie Hawn...

[Bassnote]

Fast Times At Ridgemont High should get an honorable mention for the funniest high school football scene ever.

And...dare I say it...LUCAS! :-0

[Brad]

At the end of Best of Times the ref signals a touchdown when Robin Williams was at about the 10 yard line, and then again when he Actually Scores.

Why do I know this? Because I worked in a crummy second-run movie theater and we showed this particular gem. I saw the ending twice a day for two weeks.

[Crimsonharts]

I don't know why, but I always liked Johnny Be Good. It was a shock seeing Anthony Michael Hall's built and him shedding that geek persona. Plus, I liked Judas Priest's remake of the title song.

[Al]

No way, "Friday Night Lights" was one of the worst football movies I have ever seen, period.

The actual on-field stuff was excellently filmed......but I'd rather watch "Rudy" any day, though that wasn't from the '80's either. How about "Any Given Sunday"? Not a great plot, but anything with Pacino angry has to be good.

Hell, I'd even rather watch "The Replacments!" Ouch.

Though we're not stuck in the '70's, that decade had 2 superb football movies which were way better than the 80's ones: "Brian's Song" and "The Longest Yard" (which actually dealt with racism), instead of the crap remake with Adam Sandler.

Time to bring out my old Letterman sweater and reflect on my five years of high school football, thanks for the nostalgia Steve.

[Spears]

I agree with you, Al, but I was sticking with just high school football movies. The best football movie -- period -- is Rudy. No question about it. And yeah, I'll watch The Replacements too, but mainly for the comedy and the cheerleader scenes -- not the football.

Friday Night Lights had the best football footage, even though the off-screen story was a little hard to stomach at times. Read the book on which it's based and you'll really get the back story.

[Spears]

I forgot about "Johnny Be Good." If I had, it would have been a contender for worst movie. Trouble is, there's barely any football in the movie. Aside from the first 5 minutes, it's all off the field. Heck, it has as much football as Fast Times at Ridgemont High.

[Douglas Arthur]

No love for Wildcats, eh??
C'mon man....Nipsey Russell! That already makes it better than Tom Cruise!

I saw this at a screening when I was in College, and remember enjoying the heck out of it. I haven't seen it since, and i am sure it has aged a bit (like the Super Bowl Shuffle parody during the end credits) but I don't really think this can lay claim to worst. Didn't "Just One Of the Boys" have a football backdrop? haven't seen that one in years either, but remember thinking it was crap back then, and doubt it has gotten better over the years.

[Spears]

"Just One of the Guys" you mean? I don't remember any football scene in that, other than the DVD cover, where the girl puts helmets over her chest. (Which never happens in the movie.)

The rap scene at the end of Wildcats is so disastrous, I didn't want to mention it. Not even thinking of the Goldie Hawn bath scene can sear that rap song from my brain.

[Al]

Hey Steve,

How about "Necessary Roughness" with the last Star Trek captain, Scott Bakula?

I think it was in the early 90's. I liked it.

I'll have to pick up the book of Friday Night Lights, I agree with you completely on the fact that the off-field story really was crap-tastic.

Go Lions! (B.C., that is)

[Spears]

In the book, the off-field story is a lot better. It's not so hammy anyway. The Boobie Miles character seems pretty true to life, but his injury happened the previous season, if memory serves.

As for Necessary Roughness -- I like the movie and I'll watch it most of the time it's on. (It's college, so it wouldn't make my high school list anyway). I have a couple problems with the realism. All the cheap shots the QB takes from Texas -- those are all ejectable offenses.

(I'm a high school football ref, in case you didn't notice by now.)

[Douglas Arthur]

Sorry Steve-o...a little premature Alzheimer's there. Turning 40 today and all...

[Bassnote]

Happy 40th Douglas! Welcome to the club.

[Spears]

Don't get me wrong, Doug! I love Just One of the Guys. Classic! If I ever do a list about gender-bending movies of the 80s, it's at the top.

[Al]

High-school football ref eh? Steve, I'm impressed, as that must be a pressure-cooker if you're in a football-crazy part of America.

I'm the P.A. at my old high school for football, it's similar to a ref in the sense that if you make a mistake, you'll hear about it.

Fun 80's fact:

Sometimes for a time-out, I'll play the part of "Unchained" where Dave says, "One break, coming up!" to the end of the song, and there's always a few people who look up to the booth with a look.

Classic. I can't play 80's all the time, but I do try to enlighten the faithful from time to time.

[Al]

I just re-read my comment above. I am such a geek sometimes.

[Jose Bermudez]

Woohoo..Best of Times!

I am originally from Bakersfield Califirnia the home of the fictitious Wildcats that Taft High School had to beat.