Annoying Indy quotes? Choose wisely

Among fans of the '80s, there's nothing more celebrated than the ability to quote our favorite movies in any social setting without hesitation.

But nothing brings as much personal satisfaction as badgering co-workers and bosses with these same trivial nuggets. So it gives me great glee to introduce today's guide to better office politics...

HOW TO ANNOY YOUR COWORKERS WITH INDIANA JONES QUOTES:

WHEN YOU STEAL THE LAST DONUT: "Again we see there is nothing you can possess which I cannot take away."

WHEN ANSWERING A CELL PHONE DURING A MEETING: "It's a transmitter, a radio for speaking to God."

TO CAP OFF THAT THREE-BEER LUNCH: "Ah, dessert! Chilled monkey brains."

WHEN THE INTERN BUNGLES AN ASSIGNMENT: "You lost today, kid. But that doesn't mean you have to like it."

WHEN ACCIDENTALLY STUMBLING INTO A MANAGERS-ONLY MEETING: "Nazis. I hate these guys."

TACO-DAY AT THE COMPANY CAFETERIA: "My son, we're pilgrims in an unholy land."

A CO-WORKER RATS YOU OUT TO THE HR DEPARTMENT: "I knew you would sell your mother for an Etruscan vase. But I didn't know you would sell out your country and your soul... to the slime of humanity."

WHEN HANDED THAT PINK SLIP: "And this is how we say goodbye in Germany .... (slap!)"

Comments

[Teri]

When asked if you want a drink of water by a co worker you don't like...
"want a drink ____?, I'd rather spit in your face, if only I had some spit!"

[kg]

Best when screamed with a Chinese accent at a random time:

"Indy, Watch YOUR HEART!!!"

[Nunya]

When the office IT guy finishes fixing your computer:

"And now witness the power of this FULLY OPERATIONAL Death Star..."

Oh, wait...

[dunedin steve]

The ex-wife and sister: "Snakes... Why did it have to be snakes?...

[Bassnote]

When the boss chooses you for an important assignment:

"You have chosen wisely."

[Bassnote]

Here's a Short Round quote for you. To the co-worker that always tells the bad jokes: "Not very funny."

When your boss wants to know how the project is coming along: "I don't know, I'm making this up as I go."

Any office blunder: "I'm as human as the next man."

[Chris]

When dealing with the legal department: "Uhhh, does anyone here speak English?"

[matt]

When a co-worker steals something from your desk: "This is the second time I've had to reclaim my property from you."

In sexual harassment situation: "All I have to do is scream."

[Bill]

Come on, no Short Round quotes? For collegues who have run out of excuses, "Dr Jones, Dr Jones, no more parachute!"

[Tonianne]

When experiencing a difference of opinion with a colleague you'll never respect:

"Goose-stepping morons like yourself should try reading books, instead of burning them."

[Spears]

Nicely done, Mr. Hays.

Heh, heh. We are not thirsty....

[John Hays]

On the way to a meeting with the boss:
"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."

Office supply guy: "I always knew some day you'd come walking back through my door."

[Spears]

Good one, Jeff. And sums up my feelings on Jacksonville just perfectly.

[Jeff in Cuba]

Upon crossing the Jacksonville city line:

"I'm not going to have anything nice to say about this place when I get back!"

[Spears]

"Last Crusade" has all the best lines.

Though I'd love to find a way to use "bad dates." (In any context other than my personal life.)

[Eric62]

When shopping with the wife in a quiet home-decor boutique (off-put german accent required): "This IS a castle, and we have MANY tapestries.''