The best (and worst) fake bands of the '80s
Give Eric Idle of Monty Python's Flying Circus the credit for dreaming up the idea of fictional bands and making them popular. (Cough, cough. There was the Monkees too, but let's continue.)
His invention, The Rutles, debuted in the 1978 film All You Need Is Cash. A few short years later, the big screen would be full of fab -- and drab -- fakes, including our beloved Spinal Tap.
Tap releases their new album Back from the Dead today. It's a must-buy for all '80s fans, if only for the action-figures of Derek, David and Nigel that pop out of the liner notes. But while you're busy contemplating how to sneak off to the record store today, here's the list that Stuck in the '80s fans and writers dreamed up for the occasion.
TOP 5 BEST FAKE BANDS OF THE '80s:
5. PEZ PEOPLE (The Big Picture, 1989): Kevin Bacon and Michael McKean direct the video for Pez People in this flick about aspiring filmmakers. And yes, The Whites of Their Eyes -- which sounds exactly like a Spinal Tap tune -- was written by McKean and Christopher Guest. [Watch it]
4. THE SWANKY MODES (Tapeheads, 1988): Another obscure pick, but the finale of this John Cusack and Tom Robbins cult flick wouldn't be the same without their performance of Ordinary Man. [Watch it]
3. THE SORELS/ELLEN AIM AND THE ATTACKERS (Streets of Fire, 1984): Give the Sorels the slight nod in this tie because they perform I Can Dream About You (by the very white and now late Dan Hartman). But Diane Lane's Tonight Is What It Means To Be Young is an anthem. [Watch the Sorels | Watch Ellen Aim]
2. EDDIE AND THE CRUISERS (Eddie and the Cruisers, 1983; Eddie Lives, 1989): Michael Pare channels Bruce during On The Dark Side, but you gotta love Tom "Sgt. Barnes" Berenger on keyboards. Hat tip, of course, to John Cafferty and the Beaver Brown Band. [Watch it]
1. SPINAL TAP (This is Spinal Tap, 1984): From Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight to Stonehenge to even the lovely Cups and Cakes, you can't stop "England's loudest band." [Watch it]
TOP 5 WORST FAKE BANDS OF THE '80s:
5. THE MYSTERY (Satisfaction, 1988): The only satisfaction we got from this Justine Bateman would-be star vehicle is adding to this list of frauds perpetuated on music fans.
4. THE PINHEADS (Back to the Future, 1985): Huey Lewis was right. Michael J. Fox and his band are just too darn loud.
3. SEXUAL CHOCOLATE (Coming to America, 1988): Seeing Eddie Murphy perform her song Greatest Love of All is probably what started Whitney Houston's substance-abuse problem in the first place. [Watch it]
2. HONG KONG CAVALIERS (The Adventures of Buckaroo Bonzai Across the 8th Dimension, 1984): Peter Weller stops a concert because he suddenly hears Ellen Barkin crying? Take the Cavaliers to the pit, Big-Booty ... and use more honey! [Watch it]
1. WYLD STALLYNS (Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, 1989): The music of Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter may provide the model for life for San Dimas, Calif., in the year 2688. But in 1989, it just sucked. [Clip]
Also on the bad list: The Barbusters (Light of Day), Cube-Squared (Tapeheads).
Check out my list of the best fake bands of all time on tampabay.com.
Relive the music, movies and culture of the greatest decade ever with Times online editor Steve Spears. A teen during the decade, Steve is obsessed with everything from Duran Duran to Journey, John Hughes to John Cusack, and parachute pants to Reaganomics.
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What about "Dregs of Humanity" from the short-lived Jason Bateman sitcom "It's Your Move"?
Posted by: Brian | June 17, 2009 at 05:24 PM
You've got to be kidding me. How can you put Sexual Chocolate in the worst 5. Those boys are good. When the moment presents itself, I still sing their version.
Posted by: Al | June 17, 2009 at 03:14 PM
Dude, What about Jem and the Holograms, The Misfits and The Stingers? I know they were animated, but they were up there with the Best (and Worst) bands of the 80's.
Posted by: Trace | June 17, 2009 at 09:45 AM
The Monkees may have started out as a TV band, but did began to put out some good music so they are not really a fake band. Just like the Partridge Family was a fake band, but David Cassidy was a real musician and put out several songs. However he was playing a character with a different name on TV (Keith) while the Monkees used thier real names. Even David Bowie changed his name because of the popularity of the Monkees. (Davy Jones)
Now Milli Vanilli was the ultimate Fake Band. They fooled everyone and even won several awards before they were found out.
Spinal Tap will always be my favorite though.
Posted by: DerekT | June 17, 2009 at 07:29 AM
Yes you do hear Big Fun's music. Their song is "Teenage Suicide (Don't Do It)."
BTW, there is a young adult book called "Naomi and Ely's No Kiss List" by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan (the duo that brought us Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist) and the band in the book is called My Dead Gay Son. I so wish I had thought of that!
Posted by: Cathy | June 16, 2009 at 08:44 PM
Bad News are the British equivalent to Spinal Tap. (Although they came out before ST.) Check them out on YouTube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8feNFx3y3U
Posted by: KissFreakShandi | June 16, 2009 at 07:49 PM
ok, the monkees were not a fake band. they put out records and toured, just like any other band. just because they were put together for a tv show doesn't make them a fake band. they even produced and wrote their own material. a fake band, would be a band that is fictional, as in never put out a real song or anything of that sort. the only crime the monkees have done, was not play the music on their first two records. it wasn't their choice, but the powers that be and don kirschner, the music supervisor of the series. i guess you hit a nerve there, i'm a huge monkees fan, and i may get testy when someone disses them, even jokingly.
Posted by: CHAD | June 16, 2009 at 06:09 PM
I just got the new Spinal Tap, and the DVD commentary is hysterical. Totally worth getting.
Posted by: Bassnote | June 16, 2009 at 03:25 PM
Here is another fake band, the Max Rebo Band from Return of the Jedi.
Posted by: DerekT | June 16, 2009 at 03:21 PM
Commitments was 1991.
Posted by: Spears | June 16, 2009 at 02:53 PM
I would have put "Big Fun" in there but we never hear their music, do we?
Please tell me we don't hear their music because by no means do I want to watch "Heathers" again.
Posted by: Spears | June 16, 2009 at 02:53 PM
The Commitments was late 80s or early 90s? If it was 80s,they should be included.
Two of the best bands ever (not 80s) were Stillwater and Barry Jive and the Uptown Five aka Kathleen Turner Overdrive.
From the 80s naturally Spinal Tap as n#1.I still have to watch Tapeheads.
Posted by: Miguel | June 16, 2009 at 02:02 PM
Steve-
Don't forget Big Fun from your all-time favorite movie, Heathers! ;)
You missed me, didn't you?
Posted by: Cathy | June 16, 2009 at 12:51 PM
I just think any fake band list is incomplete without The Stains and The Looters from
"Ladies and Gentleman, The Fabulous Stains"
Posted by: rotnes | June 16, 2009 at 12:40 PM
Seriously, listen to that song by the Hong Kong Cavaliers. It's beyond awful.
It's okay to love the movie (but I don't), but that band is just beyond bad.
Posted by: Steve Spears | June 16, 2009 at 12:18 PM
The Hong Kong Cavaliers are on the wrong list! Aagh!
What about Nick Rivers (Top Secret!)? Does "Skeet Surfin'" not qualify just because he's a solo act?
Posted by: Brad | June 16, 2009 at 12:09 PM
Awww, you're killin' me with The Hong Kong Cavaliers....no love. They had another actual '80s rocker in that band, Billy Vera of Billy and The Beaters. His music was used on "Family Ties" as well.
Posted by: Dave, aka Maestro | June 16, 2009 at 12:00 PM
I have to admit I'm pleased to see The Sorels on the blog list and the one you compiled for tampabay.com. You hit the nail on the head when you said it was a shocker to learn the guys on the screen weren't responsible for the vocals of "I Can Dream About You."
Posted by: Marissa | June 16, 2009 at 11:03 AM
I have to get the new Spinal Tap today. Great list.
Posted by: Bassnote | June 16, 2009 at 10:58 AM