Top 5 country movies (a.k.a. 'Just read a book')

American Idol ... country music ... network TV watching. These are terms not thrown around very often on Stuck in the '80s and for good reason. (We don't like these things!)

But tonight, I'm stuck babysitting Sean Daly's Pop Life American Idol Chat and Shame-a-thon where those who have less of a social life than hibernating meerkats congregate to ridicule people who are far more talented than ourselves. (Me? I only watch because I'm sure one day Paula Abdul is gonna pass out on live TV and I don't want to miss it.)

And of course, it's Grand Ole Opry Week at Idol. Not something fun like Red Dawn Week or Max von Sydow Week. The whole thing stinks like Rhinestone, a movie so bad that Stallone and Parton still have visible scars from having their acting careers yanked away without anesthesia.

So please do me a favor and drop by the live chat, which starts at 9 p.m. Eastern time. We can talk '80s stuff even ... I promise!! In the meantime, here's a list to get you in the mood.

TOP 5 COUNTRY MOVIES OF THE '80s:

5. RHINESTONE (1984): "All right, we'll go to your place and you can show me your organ. But I'm warning you, it'd best be having music coming out of it."

4. MURPHY'S ROMANCE (1985): "You're a feisty old booger, aren't ya."

3. TENDER MERCIES (1983): "I don't trust happiness. I never did, I never will."

2. COAL MINER'S DAUGHTER (1980): "Are you so dadburn ignorant you don't know what horny means?"

1. URBAN COWBOY (1980): "My legs are sweatin', momma."

Fatal attraction: The story of Squirrel Girl

Tone Loc knows the pain of "fatal attractions." I'm betting he watched the 1987 flick with Michael Douglas and Glenn Close a dozen times in a row and this song wrote itself.

But all he really needed to do was talk to me a few years earlier, and I would have told him the story of Squirrel Girl. She was a sophomore at the University of Florida and we met at a social back in the fall of '86. One relatively unremarkable date later and suddenly -- irrationally -- she was everywhere. Waiting outside my door to walk to class. Lurking around the corner at happy hour with the guys. Hiring sky-writers for all I know.

After five days of increasingly annoying behavior, she popped out in full psycho mode: "Come home with me this weekend," she begged. "Pa has bagged a whole sack full of squirrels and we're gonna grill them up and have a big family dinner!" My face turned white, my stomach dropped into my shoes, and I quickly remembered my ... umm ... calculus midterm on Monday, that's it! Saved by math -- that was a first.

She dropped me on the spot. It seems the "big squirrel dinner" was the test any guy had to pass to truly win her heart. Math be damned, she reasoned, eating tree rodents fresh from the fire was far more important. And so we learn the real reason we learn calculus in college: To keep the Squirrel Girls at bay.

Tonight at 8, while hosting the American Idol live chat, I confront the demons of Squirrel Girl again as Tatiana Del Toro and other Idol castaways try to weasel their way into the Top 12 after justifiably being dismissed. Join me on Sean Daly's Pop Life blog as we document another low point in American prime time television history. I'm keeping my calculus textbook nearby. Just in case.

Live chat: A drink for all my friends!

Ah yes, a Sunday night and things just feel right for a chat. There's a Rocky marathon on TV (Rocky 3 starts promptly at 8) on AMC. Or you can watch The Wedding Singer on VH1. Or you can be lame like me and just listen to old podcasts while you chat.

So here's how it works: We just use the blog for our chat. Just read the comments for the ongoing dialog. And write a comment when you're ready to jump in. Just keep refreshing your page to read the latest conversation. I'll be here, sitting in the Spears Lair, glass of fermented beverage firmly in hand.

I'm open to any topics of conversation, but I really want future podcast ideas -- especially ones for the holiday season. So welcome and enjoy. I'll be here 'til I run out of ice cubes.

Online chat tonight: We need your help!

There's a crisis here in Stuck in the '80s land, so tonight's online chat comes at the perfect time.

With the holidays upon us, Sean Daly and I have struggled to find time and inspiration for podcast topics. I tried to cram all The Young Ones DVDs through my brain, but I'm just not feeling it. And it's too late to pull off any obvious Thanksgiving-themed show, right?

So things we can discuss tonight:

• Podcast ideas for this week's episode (featuring guest-host Vegas Girlfriend);
• Rolling Stone's list of 100 greatest sings of all time;
• Show ideas for New Year's Eve.

So come back about 8 p.m. Eastern tonight and help us out! Hopefully, VGF, Daly and maybe even Stephanie Hayes will drop by.

'Children of the night ... let's chat'

OK, the Sunday night online chat is officially back for this week, Nov. 23, beginning around 8 p.m. Eastern (but lasting late enough for those working around bedtime for the kiddies).

Tune in Sunday to see some of the possible topics, but you can bet I'll be picking your brains about upcoming podcast topics (what to do for New Year's?) and new blog lists (most overrated bands? best forgotten movies?).

In other news, there's no new podcast coming Saturday. Sorry. Mr. Sean Daly Esq., as he prefers to be called now that his suddenly beloved Pop Life blog gets as many blog comments as poor ole Stuck in the '80s, is just too busy. (He's got a guy on the other line about some whitewalls, but he promises he'll talk to me later.)

Meanwhile, feel free to peruse the final list of memorable vampires that I wrote for the St. Pete Times (with the expert help of fellow writer Lisa Haiss). Thanks to everyone who helped with suggestions last weekend.

Bring back the Sunday chat? Hmmm

Something seems amiss on Sunday nights in the SIT80s nation. The absence of our beloved online chats perhaps?

I always enjoyed the chance to swap blog post and podcast ideas for a couple of hours at the end of each weekend. But then life got busy for all of us.

So lemme know: Do you want the Sunday night chat to return? We could do one this Sunday, but we ought to skip the following Sunday, since that's a holiday weekend. (Who am I kidding? We'll skip it because Vegas Girlfriend will be in town.)

Leave a comment with your thoughts on the future of the chat.

Live chat: Meat Loaf, bad podcasts and more

Our long vacation from Sunday chats is officially over. I missed you, '80s nation. I'm now online and plan to stick around til about 11 pm Eastern time.

Some of things we can chat about:

• I'd love to talk about the audio commentary we did for Halloween, and maybe give you some insider scoop on that night's frivolity.
• If everything goes according to plan, I'll be interviewing Meat Loaf in the next couple of days. So I'd love to get your questions to ask him. Plus, let's talk about his influence on the '80s.
• Ideas for upcoming podcasts, including the idea of a CD-listening party

Sean's back from Cleveland, so maybe he'll drop in and say hello too.

'Everyone's entitled to one good scare'

Wanna hear something really scary? There is no new Stuck in the '80s podcast coming this Saturday!

BUT! But! Co-host Sean Daly and I are recording a special audio commentary/podcast for uber-horror flick Halloween on Saturday night right here from the Spears Lair. And you can participate. We'll be live on the blog during the movie and we'll read comments from the SIT80s nation during the podcast while there are breaks in the movie.

Now, I know what you're thinking: "Halloween isn't even an '80s flick!" Suspend your firm grip on the facts, my friends. On this, the 30th anniversary of the John Carpenter classic, it's time that all of us tip our cap to the movie that created and defined the '80s slasher genre.

So drop by the blog after 9 p.m. Eastern time on Saturday, Oct. 4, and say hello or fire away with trivia questions for us. We'll read your comments live (during recording), and you can tune in next week for the finished product.

FIVE MEMORABLE LINES FROM HALLOWEEN:

5. "Don't rip my blouse, it's expensive you idiot!"

4. "You've fooled them, haven't you, Michael? But not me."

3. "I'll be right back. Don't get dressed!"

2. "Death has come to your little town, Sheriff."

1. "It's Halloween, everyone's entitled to one good scare."

Live from the Regeneration Tour!

Mike Score and A Flock of Seagulls at Ruth Eckerd Hall.

It's finally here: The ultimate '80s roadshow -- the 2008 Regeneration Tour -- has landed in Tampa Bay. I'm here, backstage at Clearwater's Ruth Eckerd Hall, to bring to all the juicy scoop -- or at least make a noble effort.

The show is set to start at 7 p.m. with Naked Eyes, led by my new best friend Pete Byrne, taking the stage. I'll be handling the introductions and then attempting to literally stage-dive into my chair so I don't miss a single note. (Note to security personnel: Just kidding.)

I'll also try to post some pics during the night as well. In the meantime, feel free to fire away with comments and questions. I'll do my best to get you the answers. (First answer: boxers, with little firetrucks on them.)

5:45 pm: Mike Score of A Flock of Seagulls is walking around backstage. My first good deed of the night? Showing him where the restroom is. So all my hours here at the hall finally pay off.

6:50 pm: Just 10 minutes before I have to go slur my way through stage announcements. Cotton mouth sets in. Band members are wandering around freely backstage now. I just bumped into Chris Stainton from Rubix Cubed, the official '80s cover band of Stuck in the 80s. He's sporting a "Frankie Say" shirt. Nice tribute.

7:10 p.m.: We're running late, but about to get started. I just chatted with Pete Byrne from Naked Eyes and Dale Bozzio from Missing Persons. Just as friendly as you'd want them to be.

7:20 p.m.: OK, my stage introductions are over! And the best part was just hanging with Pete from Naked Eyes for the 5 minutes before going out. Fulfilling his promise, he sang "Rocket Man" to me right before I walked out with the microphone. And as has become tradition, I introduced them by saying, "Please welcome, my good friends ... Naked Eyes!"

I doubt I'll get this silly grin off my face any year soon. For the record, tonight Naked Eyes is opening with a killer version of "Voices in My Head."

7:35 p.m.: People are really enjoying Naked Eyes, so I slipped away backstage again. Martin Fry of ABC just arrived and is saying hello to the Seagulls, who are drinking beers and getting ready to go on next.

8:10 p.m.: Pete just popped by and gave me a copy of his single "Movies I Dream" from the "Piccadilly" album, which is due out in 2009. He peeled off the plastic wrapped and signed it -- "Steve, All the best! Pete Byne." Again, can the night get any better?

Dale from Missing Persons joined us for a quick chat. She told Pete she was always a big fan of his songs and so we all just enjoyed the moment. Dale has a crazed energy tonight -- she looks more eager for the show than I am, which is damn near impossible. A Flock of Seagulls is still on stage, playing "Wishing," a song that never got its proper due, I say.

8:20 p.m.: Seagulls is finishing their set with "I Ran." The crowd is really going nuts. Damn straight. This is '80s Night in Clearwater, and there's no going back to today's dull, monotonous music after hearing these bands play live.

8:40 p.m.: Dale Bozzio and Missing Persons got a huge reaction when they appeared on stage moments ago. Dale is constantly pouring champagne into a glass, which she is sipping between songs. (That's the secret to her ability to hit the high notes, I'm deducting.) She opened up with "Destination Unknown" and the crowd jumped to their feet for the whole song. She's still able to hit that "hiccup" note too.

And to answer the big question: No, she's not wearing the metal bikini that she made famous 25 years ago in all those killer MTV videos. She has on bell-bottom jeans, a big black jacket and a fedora.

9 p.m.: The meet-and-greet is on. About 10 of us are waiting for Martin Fry from ABC. Suddenly there he is, just as cool and unassuming as he was during my podcast interview with him. He introduces himself to everyone and poses for whatever photos we want. He remembers me from our podcast interview, and we have a short talk about that interview and the Las Vegas show. Martin says he has a couple new songs to play tonight that we didn't hear in Vegas.

And then I confess that I think ABC blew Human League away during the Vegas show. He gives me a nice grin, and says "Yeah, yeah? Ah, cheers mate! We sorta thought so too."

Just as Martin is finishing up, Mike Score from Seagulls comes in, and we get a chance for a photo with him. My friend John (who took the photo of Dale above) and I have a quick chat with Mike, asking him about "Space Age Love Song," which Mike confesses is his favorite song too. "The keyboard player from ABC asked how I came up with that song," Mike says. "I told him, I just put my hands on the keyboard and went da-dum, and there it was."

9:25 pm: Intermission time again. The Romantics guitarist just walked by my door, strumming along. No red leather suits tonight.

10:20 pm: You wouldn't believe me if I told you what I've been doing the last hour. Really. Let's just say rock n' roll is still alive, and Dale Bozzio is the current reigning queen of that movement. After her set, Dale signed autographs from the stage, from off the stage, outside in the lobby and then right back the backstage door literally for an hour. Maybe two. I've lost time.

"I'm NOT going to not sign autographs!" she tells the security around her. Once people realize she's there and being so accommodating, she's mobbed non-stop with people wanted ticket stubs signed, requesting hugs, photos, everything.

She ended up in the Green Room with a few hardcore fans and held court for all of us, spinning stories you would simply just insist I'm making up. I think she's still in there. I gave her a good hug a couple of times, just because that's what you do in moments like that.

I've missed the entire Romantics set, but I'm ok with it. I have a photo of Dale hugging me, and a special souvenir for uber-fan Johnny B. Goode. (This will make us even for the Eli Manning autography, buddy.)

10:30 p.m.: Martin Fry is outside my room now, dressed in black. Members of Missing Persons are hanging out with him, shooting the breeze. The Romantics are presumably finishing up their set with "What I Like About You." And yes, I've been told Dale's still in the Green Room, telling more incredible stories and sipping champagne.

Final line by the Romantics: "What's what we like about Clearwater, Florida!"

11 p.m.: Here comes ABC. The first song -- "The Very First Time."

11:40 p.m.: No gold suit, but does that really matter? It's ABC. It's Martin Fry.  They ran through a quick set of about six songs. Sadly, no "All of My Heart." But they did a particularly soulful version of "Be Near Me," which was just as endearing. And they had everyone on their feet for "Poison Arrow," "How to be a Millionaire," "When Smokey Sings," and the finale -- "The Look of Love."

Has it really been 25 long years since those songs were top of the chart? Tonight, nobody could remember. And nobody really cared.

I'll post photos of my encounters with Martin, Dale and Mike Score sometime soon, when the buzz from tonight's show wears off. In the meantime, special thanks to all my new friends who showed up tonight wearing "Stuck in the 80s" t-shirts. That meant a lot to me. A very special high-five to Jason Matteucci at Ruth Eckerd for sharing his photos with me. And as usual, never-ending thanks to the entire staff at Ruth Eckerd, who are like family to me on nights like this.

I hope everything was good in the world tonight!

[Photos by Jayson Matteucci of Ruth Eckerd Hall]

Live chat: What's on your mind?

Our legendary Vegas trip is over and the summer concert season is nearly finished. And though the temperatures here in Florida will still hover around 90 for the next few months, the calendar says the specter of fall will soon be upon us all.

The Sunday night chat beckons as well. I'm ready to chat, so drop me a comment. I'm also looking for suggested chat topics. (I could always answer lingering questions about Vegas. That should scare some of my travel-mates into participating.)

We'll go as long as I can stay awake, which as we all know is a crap-shoot at best.

But fret now. It's either a live chat or I'll sit on my leather couch, watch "Meatballs" on DVD in my Tron pajamas, replaying the sad ending over and over again when they round up all the kids and ship them back to their parents, with "Moondust" by Terry Black playing at top volume over my cheap Wal-Mart stereo. (Relive another favorite scene.)

Only you can save me.