I gotta tip for you

To all you fans out there--which, technically, amounts to my mother and someone named Richard Guzinya so far--sorry for the lag on posts. I had a wireless card die on me in Minneapolis. But before I launch into fascinating tales of the Betty Crocker kitchens and Native American wild rice harvests, I'd like to pause for a moment to talk about tipping.

I tip 18 or so percent on the total bill, not the pretax total. I never punish a waiter for the kitchen's mistakes; if a restaurant is insanely busy, the server doesn't bear the brunt of my frustrations. I will tell a server when he or she has done a good job, and I will express dissatisfaction as well. Very, very seldom does my tip dip below 15 percent.

But that's just the kids' stuff. Tipping quandaries like this I'm still figuring out:

• You have a drink at the bar, you move your tab to your table (if you tip the bartender 15 percent, then tip the waiter 15 percent, you've tipped twice on the same drinks).
• Free valet parking at a restaurant. What's the standard tip? (This is especially vexing when the restaurant has a huge, no-need-for-valet parking lot in back. Why can't we park our own dang cars?)
• An order-at-the-counter restaurant in which you pick up your food, grab your drink and bus your own table. There's still a line on the bill for tip--do you? On the other hand, how about an order-at-the-counter restaurant where they bring you your meal and you leave all your detritus on the table? Very different scenarios, really.

Then there's non-restaurant tipping:

• You have a wireless card die and the hotel's tech support comes twice and can't fix the problem. Do you tip twice? At all?
• A plumber comes to install something correctly that he had previously installed incorrectly.
• You have your house painted. The painter owns the business, so essentially you're paying him directly. Is tipping expected? Insulting?

Give me your tips on tipping...

Comments

[A. Smedley]

Mouth, motherhood carries with it the inalienable right to be the biggest, most obstreperous fan of one's offspring. And hopefully, when we get old and crotchedy, we anticipate that our children will take us out for Sunday dinner at the nearest Red Lobster ... and tip the wait-staff heavily to make up for the fact that the old geezer at the table has made an embarrassing scene!

[Sue T.]

It would never have occurred to me to tip a plumber or a house painter! I did give a few bucks to the painter's assistant last time we had it done, though. As for the bartender-at-restuarant situation -- I was under the impression that waiters have to "tip out" to other restaurant staff at the end of the evening, and thus it's not necessary to tip the bartender directly if you're having the tab moved to your table. I'm sure if that's not true, someone in the biz will pipe up. BTW, tipping.org is a good source of info on how/when to tip. (One of the things I like about visiting Europe is not having to worry about tipping... it's such a minefield!)

[Two Travelling Chefs]

As restaurant owners/chefs, we work not only on creating a great business for ourselves, but we also feel that our staff are part of our success, and a tip reflects all elements of an evening out for our guests. The service, the food, the timing, the atmosphere work hand in hand, to make a night out a memorable experience or a forgettable event, and the gratuity is closely related to this. If we do our part in the kitchen and on the floor and our staff does their best, then the customer comes away with a feeling of satisfaction, our staff is happy, they make money, they stay, our customers ask for them...it becomes a vicious circle, and isn't that what we are all striving for.

This is 2007 and it still throws us for a loop when guests say that they had an enjoyable night, the restaurant has terrific atmosphere, they received fantastic service, and even go out of their way to go to the kitchen to tell my husband that this was the best meal they have had ever (their words). Lo and behold we see that the tip is barely 5%, thank goodness this does not happen too often, but on occassion it makes for interesting dialogue.

What happened? Don't they know any better, are they still living in the dark ages, is ignorance part of the equation, have they not eaten out since 1961, or were they European, South American, Canadian? I am from Holland originally and trust me, the majority of the travelling public, no matter what continent they are from, know what they should tip, they know what is the norm, what is too much and what is meager, it sometimes might just be easier and cheaper for them to plead the 5th. Since every single Tour book from Lonely Planet to Zagat, Fodor and Frommer, from Moon to Rough Guides Let's Go and the internet, give tipping guides, that can't be the reason.

Although we all are aware, that most waitstaff in the U.S make min. wage and tip, we forget that servers in most foreign countries not only receive a salary, but also share in the service charge. The next time you are in France or Portugal or Italy look at your bill, often you will find not only the service charge which hovers in the 8% area, but also something called couvert, cobertura, coperchio, cubierta. This is the charge for your bread and butter and refills, something no self-respecting restauranteur here we would ever consider doing.

Gift certificates is also another area that we have seen people take liberty with tipping. Leaving a tip on the net amount (e.g. your dinner bill was $100, you had a $75 gift certificate, leaving $25, and the waiter receives a whopping $5...ooops), so we indicate clearly on gift certificates, discounts etc. that the tip should be calculated on the amount prior to the discount.

There is no excuse not to tip 15-20% (average 18%) these days, and we see that our waitstaff on average makes more than that. Do we trip up from time to time, sure, we are human, after all, but as long as those incidents are very far and very few in between and immediately corrected, they should not reflect in the tip. We can lament that servers need to receive a salary instead of minimum wage and tips, but it will be awhile coming, and is a separate heated debate, so till then we will do all possible to make sure that the customer receives the best we can offer and our staff receive their commensurate compensation as well.
Regarding bartenders, we either have the customer close the check at the bar, if they wish, and tip out the bartender accordingly or we will transfer the bill to the table and the guest tips once on the bill. That also means the server will not only tip out the bartender, as is the norm, but will throw in something extra.

[a server]

One thing to remember when tipping, when someone says a server receives minimum wage, that it isn't standard minimum wage (i.e $6.67). In most states (Florida included) there is a separate minimum wage for servers. In Florida it is currently $3.67. In other states it's lower, in others it's higher. That is something I believe most people aren't aware of, and that must be taken into account.

[a server]

Also, servers do have to tip out others in the restaurant. In some places it's quite a bit. Normally you tip out the bartenders. In some restaurants you tip out the busboy, hostess, and even the server assistant or food runners, who normally make more an hour. You can be tipping out up to 3% or 4% (or even more) of your total checks. Then we are also taxed on our sales automatically, so even if you don't tip (or tip poorly) we must pay others based on your check.

[A. Smedley]

Hey, Mouth ... all these years I have tipped based on the total bill (tax included). There are others in my family, I recently observed, who tip based on the pre-tax amount. What is the current expectation? For instance, last night I paid a bill that totaled $113.95, including the tax. I left a tip of $20, which puts me slightly over a tight-fisted 15% tipper but less than a lavish, devil-may-care 20%er. But, which is RIGHT? Before sales tax or including?????