It's got a meat I can dance to

My buddy Hank has brought an important development to my attention:

Apple Inc.'s iPod portable media players are hardly new in the gadget world, but they do have a new — and somewhat unexpected — accessory: a protective case that looks like meat. Marketed by Japanese entertainment company Solid Alliance, the plastic case appears to be crafted from beautifully marbled Kobe beef, and it has a price tag to match: $88.

Recipegate

One of the latest campaign gotchas has been dubbed Recipegate. Cindy McCain contributed 12 “family recipes” to her husband’s campaign website (one of them, her Passion Fruit Mousse, appeared in a New York Sun article on Jan. 16). Unfortunately, her “family” appears to have sourced its recipes verbatim from Food Network’s website. Once the story broke on April 15, it took a mere dozen hours for the disputed recipes to be expunged from McCain’s site. An intern took the fall. Case closed.

In the scheme of things a very faint smudge on McCain’s permanent record (come on, Cindy, your grandma was whipping up passion fruit mousse and seared ahi steaks?), but it leaves lingering questions. Had it been a short story or a poem that Cindy McCain had lifted from the Norton Anthology of Literature, the consequences would have been dire. While plagiarism isn’t a legal term, prosecuting the theft of intellectual property is common. It would have been stealing, plain and simple. Recipes are trickier.

Professional chefs are trained in the classics, drawing inspiration and building on recipes by greats like Auguste Escoffier and Marie Antoine Careme. They work in kitchens with other chefs, swapping ideas and techniques. What constitutes intellectual property in this world is muddy.

Watch it wiggle, see it jiggle

This is too good to pass up. My friend Chad sent me this link. It seems that yesterday morning in Jacksonville on I-95 a truck carrying Jell-O snack packs flipped over after it slammed into another truck. The upshot? Jell-O splattered all over the highway.

The driver was rescued quickly and airlifted to the hospital and no other drivers were injured. Thus, it is fair game to revel in the incredible image this accident brings to mind (well, the highway wasn't exactly slick with pudding; see actual photos here). Cars navigating around puddles of chocolate goo, the air thick with the scent of butterscotch. There's got to be a good punch line here. Anyone? For inspiration, visit the Jell-O Museum in Le Roy, NY.

Future meat?

Please go here and read this story about growing meat in labs. Yes, you read that right. Here's an excerpt:

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals has just offered a $1 million prize to anyone who develops a commercially viable "in vitro chicken-meat product." The catch is that the product can't contain or entail the use of "animal-derived products, except for starter cells obtained in the initial development stages." The idea is simple: Instead of growing a chicken embryo into a bird and cutting meat from it, you skip the bird part and grow the meat directly from the embryo...To put it crudely, if you can grow a hunk of flesh for transplant, you can grow it for food.

Does this strike anyone as deeply sinister? Not in a stem-cell-research-is-the-devil's-work kind of way. Just that literally making meat in a laboratory seems fraught with all kinds of room for error. Can't we just eat a lot less of it and focus on cultivating foods that don't wreak so much havoc on the planet?

My friend KS, a psychologist at USF, brought this to my attention. But she also added this, which may explain some of my queasiness about this:

A guy was here (USF) giving a talk recently. He was studying the difference between moral disgust and physical disgust (obviously asserting they were different). As a manipulation, he asked people about their reactions to unknowingly being served test-tube grown human flesh. No human was harmed, but genetically, it's human flesh.

Dine Out For Life

ASAP —as soon as possible — is a common acronym in our daily lives. But for the thousand people who benefit from AIDS Service Association of Pinellas, that’s often not soon enough. The largest provider of HIV/AIDS services in Pinellas, ASAP will hold its second annual Dining Out For Life evening on Thursday to raise money for services.

The event was created by ActionAIDS in Philadelphia in 1993. Since then, 3,500 restaurants internationally have donated a percentage of their proceeds from this single night to AIDS service organizations around the country and Canada, making it the largest international fundraising event for HIV/AIDS.

The idea is simple: Dine at any of the 36 participating restaurants in Pinellas County on Thursday and 25 percent of your bill will be donated to AIDS Service Association of Pinellas. According to Daniel Hodge, local community programs director for ASAP, the money goes to fund a food pantry program and an annual retreat for those suffering from HIV/AIDS. Last year the evening netted $13,000 from the 23 participating restaurants; this year he hopes that number will be doubled.

Participating restaurants include: Ai-Mei Thai, Backfin Blue Café, Basta’s, Bella Brava, Blue Heron Café, Brisket Basket, Café Dolce, Café Ten-O-One, Casa Tina, C.D. Roma’s, Chiang Mai Thailand, Compass Grille, Dominic’s Pizzeria, Elements Global Cuisine, Feola’s, Ferg’s Sports Bar, Fortunato’s, Friendly Fisherman, Georgie’s Alibi, Gratzzi, Domain Food & Spirits, Isabelita’s, Island Flavors and Tings, Java Nirvana Café, La Cote Basque, La Fogata Churrascaria, Le Bouchon Bistro, Lucky Dill Deli, Mid Peninsula Seafood Market, Palm Terrace Grill, Peg’s, Pia’s Trattoria, Roman Gardens, Sal’s Town Shore, Spoto’s Italian Grille, and Water Witch. (More restaurants could be added to the list. Check here.)

In Gulfport alone, a dozen restaurants in a three-block area will participate, coalescing in a festive “movable feast” street scene. As Hodge explains, “This is just our second year, but the potential is enormous.” So, eat early, eat often, and order dessert — it’s for charity.

Yeah, Earth Day!

EVOS restaurants plan to shake things up Tuesday on Earth Day by offering free organic, low-fat milkshakes to their customers. Their milkshakes are made naturally with a simple key ingredient list of 2 percent certified organic milk, sugar, and added multi-vitamin. Headquartered in Tampa, EVOS serves fast-food staples such as burgers, fries, and milkshakes that contain 50 to 70 percent less fat than its competitors (mostly because of these cool "airbaking" ovens). In addition to their healthy focus (and organic whenever possible), EVOS restaurants also use green materials when designing and constructing its buildings. The company chooses environmentally-friendly products like Marmoleum, a composite that contains wood flour, linseed oil, rosin and jute fiber and has no toxic chemicals. The company also uses recycled wood panels, offsets a portion of their energy usage with renewable wind energy, and prints guest materials on recycled paper.

Home cooks can go green more easily with a new line of nonstick cookware avaible at HSN.com. Your old Teflon non-stick pan is releasing toxic gases into the environment and hazardous material into your food. The GreenPan (six-piece cookware set $99.90) is the first cookware product to utilize Thermolon non-stick coating which is PTFE/PFOA-free, and will perform at high temperatures without deterioration or releasing harmful fumes.

James Beard Writing nominees

Now that my mourning is finished, I can announce the James Beard Foundation Journalism Awards for articles published in 2007. Some really wonderful pieces of writing about food. Look forward to finding out the big winners in June.

NEWSPAPER FEATURE WRITING ABOUT RESTAURANTS AND/OR CHEFS
Brett Anderson
The Times-Picayune
"Landmark Decisions: A Five-Part Series Chronicling the Ruin and Restoration of a Classic New Orleans Restaurant"

Eliza Strickland
SF Weekly
"Burnt Chefs"

Robb Walsh
Houston Press
"Guess Who's Making Your Dinner"

NEWSPAPER FEATURE WRITING WITHOUT RECIPES
Fuchsia Dunlop
Financial Times
"Blind Tasting"

Janet Rausa Fuller
Chicago Sun-Times
"Fish Fraud: The Menus Said Snapper, but it Wasn't!"

David Leite
The New York Times
"In a '64 T-Bird, Chasing a Date With a Clam"

NEWSPAPER FEATURE WRITING WITH RECIPES
Ronni Lundy
Santa Fe New Mexican
"At One With Bees"

Katy McLaughlin
The Wall Street Journal
"A New Taste Sensation"

Jill Wendholt Silva
The Kansas City Star
"Food Stamp Challenge: One Week, Four People and a Tight Budget"

MAGAZINE FEATURE WRITING ABOUT RESTAURANTS AND/OR CHEFS
Dave Gardetta
Los Angeles Magazine
"The 800th Plate"

Howie Kahn
GQ
"The Wandering Chef"

John Powers
Departures
"Dim Sumptuous"

MAGAZINE FEATURE WRITING WITH RECIPES
Betty Fussell
Saveur
"American Prime"

Barbara Kafka
Saveur
"Toss and Serve"

Zak Pelaccio
Food & Wine
"An American Chef's Malaysian Love Story"

MAGAZINE FEATURE WRITING WITHOUT RECIPES
Manny Howard
New York Magazine
"My Empire of Dirt"

Rob Patronite and Robin Raisfeld; Michael Idov; Emma Rosenblum
New York Magazine
"Cartography: The Complete Road Map to New York City Street Food"

Alan Richman
GQ
"Year of the Pig"

RESTAURANT REVIEWS
Colman Andrews
Gourmet
"Super Tuscan", "Next Mex", "Savoy Fare"

Brad A. Johnson
Angeleno
"Hampton's", "Sona", "The Penthouse"

Jason Sheehan
Westword
"Lost and Found", "Holiday", "After Dark"

REPORTING ON NUTRITION OR FOOD-RELATED CONSUMER ISSUES
Brandon Bailey
San Jose Mercury News
"Where Does Your Food Really Come From?"

Sasha Chapman
Toronto Life
"Sitting Ducks"

Peter Jaret
EatingWell Magazine
"The Search for the Anti-Aging Diet"

FOOD-RELATED COLUMNS
Anya von Bremzen
Travel + Leisure
"Best New Restaurants 2007", "Tastes of Europe", "Viva la Tapa"

Corby Kummer
The Atlantic
"The Rise of the Sardine", "The Art of Aging Well", "The Magic Brewing Machine"

Julia M. Usher
Sauce Magazine
"Prep School" ("Braising: A Magical Transformation from Tough to Tender," "Quick-Process and Refrigerator are Two Pickles You'll Want to Be In," "In the Game of Pâte à Choux, the Classical Method Wins")

Robert Irvine, down but not out

Irvine's April newsletter came out today. I thought I'd share its contents. I guess the take-away is something like "the knight is always darkest before the dawn":

Dear Friend,

The Battle is Not the War

While the past few weeks have been filled with a lot of ups and downs, I have always felt that life is a series of challenges that breed new and exciting opportunities. Even though a lot of what happened was mischaracterized I know one thing: I can cook.

Whether it was serving food to the Royal Family during my tenure on the Royal Yacht, Britannia, training many of the cooks and staff who work in the White House Mess or devising menus and presenting dishes to my adopted country's Chief Executives, I am proud of my culinary accomplishments and of the work I've done on Dinner: Impossible, where I have faced some of the toughest cooking situations a chef could ever imagine.

I am proudest of the friends I've made along the way, the lives I've been allowed to touch and most of all, of the love and support of my family. I am ready and eager to move forward to the next chapter, the next challenge and the next opportunity.  I thank you for the support I have received from so many of you and the heartfelt good wishes and prayers you have sent to me and to my family. 

Let's move on together!

       Bon Appetit! 

In time for Passover

While the chickens are taking a little pre-Passover jacuzzi in preparation for this recipe, here's another holiday tip. I got e-mail today from Barb Hecht of St. Petersburg who sells 100% organic/kosher dried herbs and spices at local farmers' markets. Her company, Kess Gourmet Foods, began at the end of 2007. For more information, visit here or call 727-623-3268.

I admit it, this is a cheap post

Yup, it's one of those e-mail time-sucks that makes the rounds. But it is restaurant-related and modestly entertaining. Drum roll....Your Age By Eating Out

Don't cheat by scrolling to the end.

1. Pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat (more than once but less than 10).

2. Multiply this number by 2.

3. Add 5.

4. Multiply it by 50.

5. If you have already had your birthday this year, add 1758.

6. If you haven't, add 1757.

7. Now subtract the four-digit year that you were born.

8. You should have a three digit number. The first digit of this was your original number (how many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week).

The next two numbers are YOUR AGE.

Did it work?

Ezra's in Bradenton

Been doing an enormous amount of eating, some exciting finds, some disappointments. I won't yet say which is which, but in the past few days I've been to the new Table and Mesa Lounge on Central Ave. in St. Petersburg, the MFA Cafe at the Museum of Fine Arts, Belleair Grille and Wine Bar in Clearwater, T.C. Choy's in Tampa for dim sum, Grass Root Organic Restaurant in Tampa for vegan/raw food (alright, I've got to go ahead and say, it is fabulous), and Pane Y Vino in Dunedin.

While I'm writing up my findings, take a drive south to Bradenton for a visit to Ezra’s (5629 Manatee Avenue W., Bradenton, (941) 792-0990, lunch Mon.-Fri. and dinner Mon.-Sat.). See below for a little background on chef David Shiplett.

****

It was a heady era for the restaurant scene of San Francisco. Supercharged by a stunning economic boom, the late 1980s were a time of gastronomic excess, of culinary flights of fancy and the ascendance of the “celebrity chef.” David Shiplett was in the middle of it all. A graduate of the prestigious California Culinary Academy, he had had access to some of the greatest minds in food—Jeremiah Tower, Ken Hom, Bruce Aidells, and Masataka Kobayashi had all shared their kitchen secrets with the eager students in the tall white hats.

“I wasn’t expecting the biggest benefit of cooking school to be the access to big name chefs,” Shiplett remembers, “but there was so much to learn just sitting on the bus and talking to them. Without them, there is no way I would be the chef I am today.”

Well, Bradenton has some chefs to thank. Having grown up in Bradenton, Shiplett has returned to his roots, buttressed by all the knowledge imparted by those fabled chefs. His own passion predates cooking school (“I cooked growing up—as a teenager I was really hungry!”), but has culminated in his charming and critically acclaimed Ezra’s, opened almost four years ago on Manatee Avenue.

Kudos to Fabrizio Schenardi

So close. Fabrizio was on a Today Show segment that got cut this morning. Still, this local chef got some nice place in the print story written by the Today Show's travel contributor, Peter Greenberg.

See the story here. It says:

"Want to step up the culinary experience at an airport hotel? Head either to Tampa or the U.K. In Tampa, the Renaissance Tampa Hotel International Plaza is another soundproof hotel, but it's not food-proof. It has an in-house "Book to Cook" cooking class and features private lessons for individuals or small groups--you'll learn cooking from local celebrity chef Fabrizio Schenardi. The 2008 rates start at $349 a night, including room, for one to two people."

It's actually a mega-cool program. Hotel guests get to create customized cooking classes with Fabrizio in a real restaurant setting.

Blame Earl Butz

So that I could write this story, I watched the documentary King Corn with my husband. Afterward, I became apoplectic with rage. Why have we made such irresponsible choices with America’s most subsidized, most productive grain? The rampant use of high-fructose corn syrup, all the secret corn in processed foods--this didn't need to happen. Accustomed to rants of this sort, my husband (a psychologist) remained unflappable. Walking through the kitchen, however, my daughter looked alarmed, the thought bubble over her head something like, "Um, my parents appear to be fighting about corn. Has anyone ever gotten divorced because of corn?"

I calmed down, but I still blame Earl Butz.

He was the secretary of agriculture under Richard Nixon, instrumental in rewriting New Deal agricultural policy, urging farmers to plant commodity crops and lots of them. As the architect of modern subsidies, his aim was to expand the reach of agriculture and transform the way we farm. Fundamentally, he wanted people fed. He enthuses about his successes in an interview with the King Corn filmmakers in his office: “Spend 16 to 17 percent of our take-home pay on food? That’s marvelous!”

Butz died this February, so out of respect I'll stop haranguing.

Evil corn from Grinning Planet.

The dollar is really stinkin up the joint

Get a load of this AP story:

Harry's Bar in Venice giving discount to Americans hit by weak dollar

ROME (AP) — Ernest Hemingway didn't have to worry about a strong euro, but Americans in Venice these days do, so the novelist's old haunt is giving U.S. tourists 20 percent off.

The classy, pricey restaurant near St. Mark's Square now sports a sign telling Americans they'll get the discount on all the items on the menu. The notice cites Americans' economic woes linked to the subprime loan crisis and was posted a few days ago.

But proprietor Arrigo Cipriani said the weak dollar is mainly what caused a sharp drop in the number of American diners, who normally make up some 40 percent of the clientele in Harry's Bar.

No need to show a passport, Cipriani said in a phone interview as dinner was being served and drinks being poured Monday night.

"All we need to hear is their accent," he said.

Cipriani said he didn't know how long the offer will last but, he joked, "I hope not too long."

"I decided to play off Americans' sense of humor," Cipriani said.

So far, the offer hasn't brought too much of an increase in Americans, he said. "But those we have had have been very happy."

The sign, in English, reads: "Harry's Bar of Venice in an effort to make the American victims of subprime loans happier, has decided to give them a special 20 percent discount on all the items of the menu during the short term of their recovery."

Hemingway schooled Harry's Bar bartenders in the fine art of achieving an extra dry martini, but the discount doesn't apply to drinks.

Brunch advice?

I'm not a breakfast person, really. Most mornings it's lonely a cup of coffee. It's several hours after arising that my stomach stirs. Thus, I'm not fully equipped for the task before me. In anticipation of Mother's Day, I want to run a brunch round-up on Thursday, May 1. I'd rather avoid the ones people already know about (Castaways, Oystercatchers, etc.) and focus on brunches a little more off the beaten path. What are people's favorites on either side of the bay?

A contender for most vile American food

This was courtesy of A. Smedley.

I was once on a camping trip and our ACTUAL dinner floated down the river in Tupperware, leaving us with nothing but Vienna Sausages and Minute Rice.

I'm sure the Austrians claim no knowledge of this travesty.

Furrowed brow

It's a rainy Sunday afternoon. The kind of time to ponder life's deep mysteries. Such as, what is this food? Out of courtesy to readers, I didn't make the photo inordinately large and, thus, deeply disturbing. The big question, of course, is why something would be called a "FOOD PRODUCT."

Does that mean it's not fully food? As in "partially defatted cooked pork fatty tissue" (that's an ingredient, no lie)? And while I'm thinking about it, what's a cheese food? Near cheese?

Because I'm supposed to be doing other things right now--writing, cleaning my house, going nowhere fast on the elliptical--I decided to surf around and find out. This site was very helpful. I learned this:

Pasteurized process cheese food is a variation of process cheese that may have dry milk, whey solids, or anhydrous milkfat added, which reduces the amount of cheese in the finished product. It must contain at least 51% of the cheese ingredient by weight, have a moisture content less than 44%, and have at least 23% milkfat.

Pasteurized process cheese spread is a variation on cheese food that may contain a sweetener and a stabilizing agent, such as the polysaccharide xanthan gum or the Irish moss colloid carrageenan, to prevent separation of the ingredients. The cheese must be spreadable at 70 F, contain 44 to 60% moisture, and have at least 20% milkfat.

Pasteurized process cheese product is process cheese that doesn't meet the moisture and/or milkfat standards.

Imitation cheese is made from vegetable oil; it is less expensive, but also has less flavor and doesn't melt well.

Thus, Velveeta is pasteurized process cheese spread and Velveeta Light is pasteurized process cheese product. Cheez Whiz is labeled as pasteurized process cheese sauce.

Still, the mysteries of potted meat elude me. I propose a list of the most revolting American processed foods, perhaps starting with the original Slim Jim (beef lips, anyone?).

More openings

A lot happened yesterday (Wednesday). Over in Tampa, the new Hyde Park Pita Pit flung open its doors at 500 S. Howard. It's open almost all hours of the day, starting with breakfast at 7 a.m., all the way through to the wee hour of 4 a.m. I guess pita never sleeps. For more info, call (321) 662-4469. 

And in St. Petersburg, the De Santo Restaurant Group reopened its De Santo Latin American Bistro under the guidance of Chef Jeannie Pierola. The reopening festivities are timed to coincide with Grand Prix pandemonium downtown--make a reservation if you want to be assured of a seat. 128 3rd St. S, www.desantorestaurant.com, (727) 895-6400.

Why I hate Hell’s Kitchen

“The only thing I’m going to lose to a woman is an ironing contest.”

“Just because I look pretty doesn’t mean I can’t cook.”

Who are these people?

I’ve never watched this show, but people have told me I oughtta. Also, I read this great Salon article about Gordon Ramsey. And then I watched this totally gorgeous one-minute YouTube video by him.

The thing is, despite his limited vocabulary (the f-word can be every single part of speech, including preposition, article and compound adjective-adverbial phrase) and dire need of forehead Botox, I like Gordon Ramsey. He was a spicy superstar in a country of limited culinarians of that ilk (I guess Marco Pierre White was cooking and cussing a blue streak on his own for a while).

Still, this show is a huge fake-fest, but worse. As with so many reality shows, it divides contenders by gender. Why not by eye color, handedness or length of second toe? It seems retro at best and deeply sinister at worst that all these shows have to be a battle of the sexes. Even yuckier, Ramsey categorizes it as “the men’s versus the girls’ team.” All these chicks look over 21 to me. Can we at least call them skirts or dames or something?

But I digress. First, there’s Bobby, a purported four-star general. There have been only 207 four-stars in the Army’s history. Yet this guy is an ineffectual doofus. Then there’s the guy who shoe-horned a Cornish game hen into a pumpkin. Whaa? And the home cook with the Moe haircut who makes chicken cacciatore and then nervously holds raw sea scallops on his open palm the rest of the show. And the willowy little mohawk guy who channel’s Runway’s Christian Siriano—like he’s got the chops to lead a kitchen? And the baldy dope-smoking Jason.

The “girls” aren’t much better, but anyway, my bigger beef: This isn’t how kitchens work. It’s not the biggest ego or the loudest voice wins a free-for-all. Everyone has a station and an assigned task. There’s a kitchen leader/chef de cuisine/head line cook who may or may not act as an expeditor, calling orders. It's not that if you get all Tyra Banks and nostril-flarey your kitchen chums start taking orders.

Then, of course, there's the final indignity. One of these d-wads (Agatha and JM, you know what I'm saying) will win this deal and instantly be plunked into a $250,000/year exec. chef job. Just another case of Reality not mirroring reality. 

Openings and closures

Openings

After numerous delays, the Table restaurant and Mesa Lounge opened Thursday in the historic Alexander Building at 535 Central Ave. in St. Petersburg. The space once was O Pescador. The original Table is in Sarasota, south of Marie Selby Botanical Gardens, and similar to its parent location, this one purveys Atlantic Rim cuisine, with dishes influenced by the Caribbean, South America and Spain. To accompany that, Mesa offers a range of mojitos. Call (727) 510-1921.

Speaking of Sarasota, that's where Big Sugar Restaurant & Rum Bar opens tomorrow at 1900 Hillview Street, between Tamiami Trail and Osprey Ave. Sounds like a field trip to me. For more information, call (941) 388-7679.

Another newcomer right downtown in St. Petersburg threw open its doors a week ago. Kahwa Coffee Roasting has had a roastery for the past year and a half, but its coffee bar at 475 2nd St. N. is brand new. Opened by two couples, Raphael and Sarah Perrier and Jean and Catherine Thibault, the cafe offers coffee drinks, juices and croissants imported from France. For more info, call (727) 823-4700.

Closures

Mangia (338 Corey Ave., St. Pete Beach) and Novo (5062 Fourth St. N, St. Petersburg) have closed their doors recently. No word on what will become of either space.

Picky, picky

My discerning colleague Jay Cridlin was just having one of those Stick-It-To-The-Man, time-frittering e-mail exchanges with me about eating habits and peculiarities (it was that or do a little online shopping). For him: no sushi, no condiments that resemble mayonnaise. In summary, he says this:

"The crux of my argument stems from discussions I've had with my wife about my eating habits. She'll say I'm very picky when it comes to certain foods (pickles, mayonnaise, cranberries, canned tuna), but I maintain that I'm a perfectly normal eater, I just don't like certain foods and refuse to eat them. Does that make me a picky eater, or simply someone who knows what foods he likes and doesn't like? It's very much a philosophical debate. What IS pickiness?"

Indeed. I pride myself on the following: a willingness to put almost any food in my mouth, chew and swallow. No discreet napkin-filling. No balking. Still, there are foods I don't exactly like. The last time I was in Paris I made it my mission to try to cultivate an affection for head cheese. No dice. Goose webs and chicken feet may just wander around my plate at a Chinese restaurant.

So, what is pickiness, and is it heritable? Meaning genetically (as opposed to nurture-wise). Some science indicates yes. Some folks say it's both genetics and environment. Get this, though. This study indicates that inbred mice choose familiar foods far more often than unfamiliar foods. Ergo, inbred=picky. Just remember that, Jay.

Table from Nature.com