Lindsay Lohan recording with Snoop Dogg

Lindsay Lohan’s music career is still kicking, apparently, since Fox News’ Roger Friedman writes she’s working on a third album. She’s left Tommy Mottola’s employ and headed over to Motown, which is still part of Universal. What’s interesting is the cast of characters she’s planning to work with.

Besides Timbaland and Pharrell, she’s already recorded a track with the Doggfather himself, Snoop Dogg. Universal is blowing a ton of cash on the album, which may be one of of the final gasps in her marketability, should it fail. If parents Dina and Michael cared at all about the rehabbed LiLo, they’d keep an eye on Snoop’s penchant for the ganja.

[Photo: AP]

Katie Holmes sent to Scientology boot camp

It's Wednesday already, and what would a week be without some completely inane Katie Holmes story alleging that Tom Cruise is brainwashing her and keeping her locked in a pantry in the basement of his Switzerland manse?

Star says Katie recently "endured" a three-day retreat at Gold Base, some Scientology camp in Hernet, Calif. Actually, they call it a boot camp, but we've never been there, so we don't know. It doesn't sound like fun, though.

"It included various tests, confession sessions, tons of reading and physically challenging purification processes," a Scientology source tells the glossy. "Tom insists that auditing and purification practices are incredibly beneficial to Scientologists at all levels." 

Apaprently these auditing sessions are a routine thing for her these days, since she's going to be moving to New York for a spell to act on Broadway and needs to be chipped like a wayward cocker spaniel. The mag says some sessions have lasted 36 hours with hardly any sleep or food. It's like watching War of the Worlds, complete with a ridiculous ending!

[Photo: AP]

Jennifer Aniston is dating John Mayer now

Who needs Jessica Simpson? John Mayer is all about Jennifer Aniston these days, In Touch says. The mag has several photos of the pair lounging around Miami last weekend.

The singer apparent flew to Miami on April 23 and checked in to the Four Seasons, even though he spent most of his time over at the $3,000-a-night (!) presidential suite at the Mandarin Oriental. Jen is there shooting Marley & Me with Owen Wilson, but she obviously had time for John.

After being caught with her several times by paparazzi, Mayer told In Touch "My weekend was good," sending Aniston fans into a twittering frenzy about whether she'll finally be able to get over Brad Pitt. We're more curious whether her career will be able to get over The Break-Up.

Video shows Ashley Dupre gave 'GGW' consent

We let the news side handle word that Eliot Spitzer's favorite hooker, Ashley Alexandra Dupre, was suing Girls Gone Wild creep Joe Francis for $10 million after she claimed she was only 17 when video of her was shot. She was accusing Francis of exploiting her image and name on the Internet. But we'll report that the joke's on her, though -- Francis and Co. have produced video of her confirming her age and giving a fake name, the AP reports.

Dupre is shown in a towel telling an offscreen questioner that her name is Amber Arpaio. "Do you know what Girls Gone Wild is?" the questioner asks. "Yes I do," she replies with a laugh. "Can I use this on Girls Gone Wild?" she is asked. "Of course you can," Dupre answers. The video also displays a New Jersey driver's license with the Amber Arpaio name and a birth date that would have made her appear to be in her 20s. Oops.

Her lawyer and PR firm wouldn't return calls from the AP, probably because they're too busy trying to beat some sense into her. You can find the AP video by clicking here.

[Photo: AP]

Kate Hudson face of People's Most Beautiful

It's time to feel bad about yourself again, because People's 100 Most Beautiful issue is on its way to newsstands. The cover girl is Kate Hudson, which we can't argue with, but the list has a few interesting choices.

Besides the usual roundup of big names like Salma Hayek, Carrie Underwood, Halle Berry, Julianne Moore and Mary J. Blige, People picked a couple people whose careers have gathered strength as of late, like Patrick Dempsey and Christina Applegate.

There were celeb couples, too, like Eva Longoria and Tony Parker, and Jessica Alba and Cash Warren, and some surprises in Sarah Silverman and Rumer Willis, who says "I grew up with a mom that most moms don't look like." That's fine, because she doesn't look like Demi Moore, either.

Other names included Isla Fisher, Zoe Saldana, Vanessa Hudgens, Taylor Swift, swimmer Amanda Beard and the Miami Dolphins' Jason Taylor. Oh, and the entire cast of Gossip Girl: Blake Lively, Chace Crawford, Ed Westwick, Jessica Szohr, Penn Badgley, Leighton Meester and Taylor Momsen. Too bad nobody's watching the show to see all those hot folks.

Paula Abdul needs to stay off the drugs

By now you've dissected Tuesday night's American Idol performance by Paula Abdul, who was so wasted on something (high on life, maybe?) that she said in front of the contestants and the entire audience that she thought Jason Castro sang twice -- but he only sang once (see video above). And she gave both songs not-so-good reviews. The nerve!

While Randy Jackson tried to cover for her and Ryan Seacrest tried to make a joke out of it, Simon Cowell tried to allay his fears of Abdul passing out right then by asking her who her favorite was. As nervous laughter filtered through the crowd, she settled on David Cook, who must have been thrilled. "It's just so hard," Paula whined about judging. No, being an underwater welder is hard; being an Idol judge is called career life support.

"It got very confusing ... the producers come up to us in the dark and said, 'We are not going to have you guys judge after each performer, we are going to have all the performers go once, then twice and at the end critique them,' " she told Entertainment Tonight. Surprised by the change, she lamented, ""I was trying to give my critique for Jason Castro, and scribbled Jason's name, and that was David's! ... We all just screwed up everything."

And yet, Paula, you're the only judge that made the mistake. Hmmm ... She gave another long-winded explanation on Ryan Seacrest's radio show Wednesday morning, but it was so circuitous we can't even recount it for you -- much like your average episode of American Idol!

Roger Waters' giant Coachella pig still missing

Organizers for the Coachella music festival just what happened to Roger Waters' giant inflatable pig, since it's been missing since it was sent airborne during a Sunday night performance.

The two-story swine was sent aloft during a Sunday performance of Waters' song Pigs at the California music festival, but instead of wrangling it back to earth, stagehands watched it float away.

"It wasn't really supposed to happen that way," festival spokeswoman Marcee Rondan said. "I don't have the details."

The festival is offering a $10,000 reward plus four Coachella tickets for life for the safe return of the pig. Waters didn't seem too terrbily upset at the time though, telling the crowd, "that's my pig" as it drifted away. He'll probably just buy a new one.

[Photo: AP]

Christian de la Fuente's arm injury is serious

Christian de la Fuente injured himself on Dancing With the Stars Monday night, but TMZ says the troublesome arm problem may put a cramp in his stint on the show. Christian was dancing the samba with Cheryl Burke when he dropped her, frills and all, when he tried to dip her.

The site says it turned out to be a real injury and not just a cramp, and surgery is possible. Producers and dancers will be discussing what's going to happen, but de la Fuente just may have to pack his bags. That's nearly as fun as being told to get out by the panel.

Today's blotter: Dourdain, Van Winkle, Hogan

• CSI actor Gary Dourdain was arrested in Palm Springs on suspicion of possessing heroin, cocaine, ecstasy and prescriptin drugs, TMZ reports. All that investigating obviously gave him some ideas.

• Robbie Van Winkle, a.k.a. Vanilla Ice, is in the clear after wife Laura Van Winkle retracted her statement that he beat her during an argument on April 10, TMZ adds. The site says no witness could back up her account, but really, who admits to seeing Vanilla Ice do anything?

• And finally, the Internets are buzzing with photos of Hulk Hogan putting suntan oil on his daughter Brooke’s bottom in a creepy display of paternal doting we can’t condone (nor can we show you the photos, because they cost money and if you haven’t heard, the economy is sour). Click here and remind yourself, it would be worse if it was Miley and Billy Ray.

Shhh! We won't tell you this is a big joke ...

You seen these before. Put your headphones on and turn the volume way up. Yes, we're bored.

Billy Ray Cyrus says he didn't see Miley's pics

Now that his little PR scam for Miley Cyrus has taken a turn south, daddy Billy Ray Cyrus is in damage control mode, Entertainment Tonight says. Pops would have never allowed a shot of his daughter seemingly topless to be taken if he had been there, a source tells the show's Web site.

Wait a minute, wasn't he there, you know, in the photos? Apparently he wasn't there the whole time, leaving the set after his portion of the shoot was over because of a prior commitment (probably opening offshore accounts to stash his meal ticket's money). He apparently also wasn't shown the photo in question prior to its publication -- despite Vanity Fair saying he was involved.

Meanwhile, the yoots are out to defend Miley, with Joe Jonas and Brenda Song previously sounding off about last week's photo fracas and Hilary Duff chipping in about the Vanity Fair fiasco to People.

"People are pushing you to do something, and if you want to do it, that's your choice, you know?" the 20-year-old Duff said. "It's not what I would choose to do, but if she did, then that's fine. That's her choice."

Even Heidi Montag -- she of the plastic surgery and the no talent -- tells Extra: I think she's a young girl in Hollywood, and she's just having fun. (She)'s exploring herself." Because Heidi is a great example.

So who to believe? If comment boards are to be trusted, a lot of you don't like the cut of Billy Ray's jib. What do you think? Truth or spin?

Fresno baseball team ribs Team Miley over pics

There's not much more on the Miley Cyrus front today so far, but the Visalia (Calif.) Times-Delta sure knows how to have fun with a stupid situation. After the craziness surrounding the 15-year-old's Vanity Fair shoot, the Fresno Grizzlies are having a laugh at dad Billy Ray Cyrus' expense.

The minor league baseball team is offering a "Hanna Montana Ride Your Kid's Coattails Night" on Wednesday. Parents who bring an award their child has won will get a $1 ticket to the game. You know, like a perfect-attendance award or a swimming medal, the paper clarifies.

“We’re distraught about the negative publicity that Miley Cyrus has recently received and terrified that this may impact the resurgence of Billy Ray’s career,” said Scott Carter, Vice President of Marketing for the Grizzlies. Hope Billy Ray can take a joke. But who cares? Baseball for a dollar!

[Photo: Getty Images]

A Jimi Hendrix sex tape isn't really a surprise

For all the people out there who think modern-day celebs are responsible for the downfall of modesty, consider that we've already heard all about a supposed Marilyn Monroe sex film. Next on the list of possibly guilty icons: Jimi Hendrix.

The New York Times says Vivid Entertainment plans to release a 45-minute DVD called Jimi Hendrix the Sex Tape, with a whole 11 minutes of a man resembling the guitar great and two brunettes. (The rest is a retrospective of his career, minus any music, 'cause you've got to pay for that.)

The man's face is only seen for a few seconds, but he's wearing the familiar bandanna and Afro, so that solves the case, doesn't it? If you feel like getting ripped off, Vivid is selling the DVD for $39.95, either in stores, on the Web or as a download. If you want to buy, we trust you're the type who knows how to find it.

Carrie Fisher finally settles Luke vs. Han debate

For years geeks the world over wondered if Carrie Fisher ever had a thing for her Star Wars co-stars, and finally, thanks to the U.K. TV show Bring Back ... Star Wars, she confirms that she was taking the name Princess Leia a bit too seriously.

"I went on the film saying ‘I’m going to have an affair’, like it was a kiwi, an exotic fruit — because I’d never had one!” she tells the show's Justin Lee Collins. And Harrison Ford was her target.

“I had a crush on Harrison for sure. Harrison is great fun when he’s had a few drinks,” she says. Shenanigans ensued. “I’m going to get in so much trouble; Once I left the room and came back and he was in the closet not wearing a lot of clothes.”

Actually, the idea of Han Solo naked is kind of weird, so she switches gears and talks about what Mark Hamill thought about all this, saying there was "some jealousy."

“Harrison had this enormous career by the second or third film, that was tough for Mark." Fisher says. "He was like, ‘This wasn’t supposed to happen — it’s the adventures of Luke Skywalker.’ ”

It sure sounds like Fisher and Ford were the ones having the adventures.

[Photo: This 2005 pic is as close as Mark Hamill ever got to Carrie Fisher. Getty Images]

Trailer trash: 'The Dark Knight' bootleg

This new trailer for The Dark Knight won't be officially released for mass consumption until Sunday, we hear, but thanks to bootleggers and the power of the Internet, you won't have to pay $9 to see it in theaters. It is a bootleg, mind you, so there's salty teenaged language at the start and the quality is pretty bad, but hey, the movie looks dope.

UPDATE: YouTube took the video down because movie studios are paranoid people may actually, you know, want to watch it.

UPDATE UPDATE: Here's a new player you can watch it on. Thanks, Dana.

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: Apparently Firefox can't read the player I've embedded from GameTrailers. Try IE or something.

Britney's streak, Uma's freak, McCready peek

• Britney Spears is officially going to be be back on How I Met Your Mother, reprising her role as an airhead who has the hots for a dorky loser, E! Online says. What is this, a biography?

• The trial for Jack Jordan, the man accused of stalking Uma Thurman, began Monday with defense attorneys saying he was “creepy,” but not a criminal, Reuters reports. As proof they used Quentin Tarantino’s obsession with Uma’s feet in his movies.

• Looking for deets on that alleged underage affair Mindy McCready had with Roger Clemens? Our print pals in SportsTalk are covering that, so go here for more. You think we’d write about that kind of trash?

Amy Poehler, Will Arnett expecting first baby

Just in time for her movie Baby Mama to take the top spot at the box office, SNL's Amy Poehler has announced she's pregnant with husband Will Arnett's baby. At least, we think it's Arnett's baby.

The 36-year-old actress' people confirmed to People that their first child is due in late fall (Arnett is 37). That's the perfect publicity trifecta for Poehler, whose Nickelodeon show The Mighty B! also debuted.

That's such nice change from the usual divorces, DUIs and drug charges we see from folks. Maybe they can make a sitcom about people in their mid 30s having babies for the first time. They could call it Your Life Is Over.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Cheri Oteri's father was stabbed to death

The father of Saturday Night Live's Cheri Oteri was allegedly stabbed to death by country songwriter Richard William Fagan Saturday night.

The AP says 69-year-old Gaetano Thomas Oteri was stabbed by the 61-year-old, who is listed as a co-writer on hits by singer John Michael Montgomery, including Sold (the Grundy County Auction Incident), Be My Baby Tonight, and I Miss You a Little. He was charged with criminal homicide on Monday.

Police say Fagan and the victim, who was Fagan's music associate and publisher, were roommates in Nashville. The Tennessean newspaper says Fagan was arrested Saturday night for a DUI. He told Police that he had fought with Gaetano (known as Tom) around 9 p.m., using a pocket knife to cut Oteri's wrist before leaving. Gaetano was discovered dead by EMTs on Sunday.

[Photo: Getty Images]

It's Music Monday!: Mr. Scruff, 'Get A Move On'

We're busy not really working so far today, so here's a little tune to play in the background while you're busy, too.

Amy Winehouse cheats on her husband twice

What we like about Amy Winehouse is that she gives us an alternate to the troubled starlets on this side of the pond and hits a sweet spot in fame -- she's known well enough to be interesting, but not well enough for anyone to actually care. With that attitude, we share the Sun's report that she not only plans to divorce her jailbird husband Blake Fielder-Civil, but has cheated on him twice.

Besides a fling with her manager's aide, Alex Haines, she recently took up with American photographer Blake Wood. Wow, now her similarities to Britney Spears are going to a whole new level. A source says her friends referred to him as Blake II, and she hooked up with him just as she was getting out of rehab and staying at London's Park Plaza hotel.

“You could hear them down the hall," a friend said. "Her thing with Blake II lasted a few weeks. The pair barely left their room.”

They were introduced by Kelly Osbourne, the paper says, and Wood had apparently been helping her fight her drug addiction. But what the Sun's source said next chills us to our very core.

“It’s funny how she bedded the last two people who have been helping to look after her. Amy is sex-mad — and she gets what she wants.” Look at that picture and think about that. Shudder.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt crash dinner

To catch up on the weekend: When last we heard from Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag, the Hills couple were getting disinvited from the White House Correspondents Dinner in D.C. on Saturday night, since Spencer thought it wasn't "A-listy" enough (i.e., he wasn't invited). But lo and behold, they managed to get in somehow.

The New York Post's Page Six says they weaseled into a couple seats at Fortune's table, and then went out for the night at various after-parties across the burg. One of the place's they dropped by was the Bloomberg LP shindig at the Costa Rican embassy, which was so over capacity that real stars like Colin Firth, Rob Lowe, Donatella Versace and Rupert Everett couldn't get in. Of course, a source tells the paper that the roof was leaking on guests anyway.

Meanwhile, Vanity Fair's party at political writer Christopher Hitchens' home went well (before the Miley Cyrus shoe dropped): Kal Penn was spotted with Salman Rushdie for a new high in incongruity, while Katie Couric, Rita Cosby, Charlie Rose and Tucker Carlson milled about, the paper says.

But for The Juice* faithful, the quote of the night came from the Capitol File party at the Newseum, where Rosario Dawson hosted and Pete Wentz acted as DJ. Before he took the tables, he gave a shout out to Ashlee Simpson by yelling, "I just want to thank my girlfriend's vagina!"

Now, now, Pete; the proper term is "my fiancee's vagina."

[Photo: Getty Images]

Miley Cyrus upset over 'Vanity Fair' photos

There's another big row over photos of Miley Cyrus -- but this time the near-kiddie-porn images are the handiwork of celebrity shooter Annie Leibovitz, and are appearing in the latest issue of Vanity Fair. Photos showing the 15-year-old wrapped in a satin bedsheet and showing her bare back accompany an interview with the singer and her father, Billy Ray. And in case you think that was kinda sort of a problem with folks, you'd be right.

"I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be 'artistic' and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed," Miley said Sunday in a statement. "I never intended for any of this to happen and I apologize to my fans who I care so deeply about."

That's a far cry from what Miley says in a caption for a photo released last week, in which she says: "I think it's really artsy. It wasn't in a skanky way. Annie took, like, a beautiful shot, and I thought that was really cool. That's what she wanted me to do, and you can't say no to Annie."

Her handlers at the Disney Channel are unhappy too, saying in a statement that "a situation was created to deliberately manipulate a 15-year-old in order to sell magazines." Because Disney never manipulates children for entertainment, of course.

Vanity Fair defended its photo shoot on Entertainment Tonight, pointing out that, "Miley's parents and/or minders were on the set all day. Since the photo was taken digitally, they saw it on the shoot and everyone thought it was a beautiful and natural portrait of Miley."

Leibovitz has her say, as well, defending the photographs by lamenting, "I'm sorry that my portrait of Miley has been misinterpreted. Miley and I looked at fashion photographs together and we discussed the picture in that context before we shot it. The photograph is a simple, classic portrait, shot with very little makeup, and I think it is very beautiful."

We've got video of the Feb. 9 photo shoot, and we have to say, it's almost gross. A Chris Gaines lookalike stroking his midriff-baring teenaged daughter is a little too north Georgia, you know? And why is everyone mad at Miley? They should be keeping their powder dry for Leibovitz, who should know better than to go all Pretty Baby during the shoot with a girl who's worth $1 billion.

[Photo: Annie Leibovitz for Vanity Fair, on the cover of the New York Post. How's that for attribution?]

'Speed Racer' could be really good ... or bad

Ali Dee and the Deekompressors are in charge of the theme song for Speed Racer, and this video features a lot of action. After watching it about five times, we've come to the conclusion that it just may be too much like the cartoon for its own good. But we're still seeing it.

Gary Coleman is getting divorced already

It's curtains for Gary Coleman's new marriage already. The 40-year-old actor and his 22-year-old wife, Shannon Price, are on the docket over at Divorce Court, with a scheduled appearance on May 1 and 2 (3 p.m. on Fox around here, folks). That's right, a two-parter!

The pair are set to argue that the marriage has failed, since they get into "ugly" fights on a monthly basis. Mind you, they only got married in August, but whatever. 

"If he doesn't get his way, he throws a temper tantrum like a five-year-old does," Price says, according to a transcript of the show provided to the AP. "He like stomps the floor and yells, 'Meehhhh,' and starts throwing stuff around. He bashes his head in the wall, too."

Coleman defends himself by saying he's just being a guy.

"When I try to state my case or explain things to her or try to get her to understand my point of view, my point of view doesn't matter," he says. Hey buddy, that sounds like a marriage to us, all right.

But awfully strange is Price's recounting of how Coleman has no friends and gets up in the middle of the night and disappears. It may account for what he describes as a "mediocre" private life. His explanation:

"I don't have any friends and don't have any intention of making any," he says. "People will stab you in the back, mistreat you, talk about me behind your back, steal from you. And they're not really your friends. (They're) only there because you're a celebrity or because they want to get something from you."

Like a few months of notoriety for marrying a basket case former child star, perhaps?

[Photo: Getty Images]

Mariah Carey is all caught up during 'GMA'

Don't dare make mistakes around divas, friends and neighbors, lest they eat you alive. Such is the case with Mariah Carey's performance on Good Morning America on Friday morning (see video below).

While Mimi looks H-O-double-T in a pink minidress, things got off to a bad start right after her introduction, with the track of backing vocals for Touch My Body starting a wee early. But here's the funny part: About three minutes in, she turns and stares at a backup singer, working the line "Stop singing my part now baby" into the lyrics. Bam!

After the performance the diva smiled and announced to the crowd she tries "to bring something new to the moment every time." Yeah, like threatening her lackeys live on national television. Hey, the song does say she'll hunt you down.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Amy Winehouse arrested; husband flirts on

Remember Amy Winehouse's fab night out, during which she was doing drugs and headbutting people? It earned her a ticket to Bobbyville on Friday, as the 24-year-old was arrested at a London police station on suspicion of assault.

The Daily Mail says Wino was due to be questioned about allegedly headbutting a 38-year-old man who approached ehr as she was trying to get in a taxi early last Wednesday. Folks in her camp say she was felt he was trying to molest her, because she oozes all sorts of class. She faces up to six months in jail and a $4,000 fine.

Speaking of jail, her no-good hubby Blake Fielder-Civil appeared in court on charges of assault and "conspiracy to pervert the course of justice" to pub landlord James King. Something tells us Blake knows all about perversion, but he denied both allegation.

And since Amy wasn't at the hearing, he was free to flirt with Sophie Schandorff, a blonde sitting in the gallery who described herself as a close friend. How close? He mouthed "You all right, babe?" and "I love you" to the 21-year-old, who mouthed "I love you" back.

Maybe that's why Wino was caught doing drugs in a restaurant bathroom the night before. Seriously, her addictions are bad enough, but when a guy like Blake thinks you're not worth the trouble, that's a reason to be depressed.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Finally, a truthful college recruitment video

This strikes a little too close to home for most of us. (If you're at work, mind the f-note about 2/3 of the way in.)

Cynthia Nixon wants to shackle her life partner

Cynthia Nixon has kicked breast cancer to the curb, so now she's moving on to other life commitments -- namely, to her partner Christine Marinoni. The National Enquirer says the 42-year-old Sex and the City star had an epiphany during her radiation treatment, and decided it was time to seal the deal.

"Cynthia and Chris want a quiet autumn ceremony in Vermont under the red leaves," a source tells the rag. "It's supposed to be a very low-key gathering, just for close friends and family."

Nixon met Marinoni in 2004, seven months after calling it quits with ex-lover (and baby's daddy times two) Danny Mozes. We wish them a happy future divorce.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Tom Cruise is going back on Oprah Winfrey

Get your Faker-E-Meters ready, because Tom Cruise plans on reliving his old couch-jumping days by going back on The Oprah Winfrey Show.

“Tom will be doing the Oprah show,” rep Julie Polkes told People. “He is really looking forward to it.”

His appearance will be a two-part extravaganza featuring a retrospective of his career since making Risky Business 25 years ago. Some of the interview will be in the studio, and some will be shot in Cruise's mountain retreat in Telluride, Colo.

His last appearance was in May 2005, when he totally shot down all hope of us ever liking him again. Actually, that happened when he lived through The Last Samurai, but that was only two years prior.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Jimmy Fallon will replace Conan O'Brien in '09

In a move that will guarantee The Juice* will sleep better at night, the Hollywood Reporter says Jimmy Fallon has signed on to replace Conan O'Brien in 2009. And by sleep better, we mean that's because we won't be watching TV after 12:30 a.m. anymore.

NBC is expected to announce the move May 12, but sources say Fallon and Late Night executive producer Lorne Michaels will start assembling a team to take over once Conan moves to The Tonight Show to fill Jay Leno's shoes.

Sure, Fallon stepped in for David Letterman back in 2003, but if his Weekend Update stint on SNL proved anything, it's that he has a hard time keeping a holding an audience. Maybe he can just sing those goofy, Weird Al Yankovic-style songs every night.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Miley's things, Carmen's ring, Megan's ka-ching

• Those photos of Miley Cyrus that leaked online are her business, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody actress Brenda Song tells People. “Whatever she does in her personal life is her personal life,” she says. But you’re 20; Why are you hanging out with such a youngin’?

• Also in People, Carmen Electra has gotten engaged to guitarist boyfriend Rob Patterson, with the former Korn touring buddy popping the question during her 36th birthday over the weekend. Hey, he’s a big improvement over Dave Navarro and Dennis Rodman.

• FHM named Megan Fox as the Sexiest Woman in the World in their annual list of the top 100 babes, with Jessica Biel second and mom-to-be Jessica Alba third. But the big story (besides Britney Spears staying on the list at No. 100) is that we can now run a photo of the 21-year-old Transformers star (above).

[Photo: Getty Images]

Heidi Montag can't take Spencer anywhere

You can never trust anything going on at the White House Correspondents dinner these days, especially after someone was dumb enough to ask Stephen Colbert to speak. But the latest did-they-or-didn't-they tale comes at Heidi Montag's expense.

The New York Post's Page Six says Montag had been invited to this Saturday's fete by MSNBC, but decided to turn it down when boyfriend Spencer Pratt couldn't get his expenses paid for. "He demanded first-class tickets for both him and Heidi -- even though he wasn't invited," a source says. The alleged reason he gave? "It wasn't 'A-listy' enough," the source added.

Really? Don't tell Pamela Anderson, actress Kerry Washington or artist Jeff Koons at Bloomberg LP's table. Or celeb couples Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner with Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz at ABC News' table. Or Time Style & Design's invites to Donatella Versace and Rupert Everett. And scattered across the room will be the Jonas Brothers, Hayden Panettiere, John Cusack, Claire Danes, Rob Lowe, Marcia Cross and Tracey Ullman.

No, not "A-listy" at all. Of course, MSNBC denies the invite at all, so what can you believe?

[Photo: Getty Images]

Yoko Ono sues film folks for using 'Imagine'

Yoko Ono is suing the producers of a movie challenging the concept of evolution, alleging they used Imagine without her permission and leading the blogosphere to castigate her (that's right, we used a big, 50-cent word right there).

A lawsuit in federal court says the producers of Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed inferred that by using the song, they are saying the people who guard her dead husband John Lennon's legacy endorsed the film, the AP reports. Not so, say the film's producers.

"Based on the fair use doctrine, news commentators and film documentarians regularly use material in the same way we do," Premise Media said in a statement. "Unbiased viewers of the film will see that the 'Imagine' clip was used as part of a social commentary in the exercise of free speech and freedom of inquiry."

The film features Ben Stein challenging Darwinian theories and suggesting that life could have come about via intelligent design. The suit alleges Ono was accused of "selling out" on blogs and forums because of the song's use.

Oh, no, no, no, Yoko -- that's not why they're saying that at all.

[Photo: Getty Images]

This little guy looks like our cubicle mate ...

... especially when he checks to see if he's been caught.

Kelly Clarkson likes being naked at her home

By now we all know about Christina Aguilera's "naked Sundays," but would you believe Kelly Clarkson likes to have naked everydays? Us Weekly is saying that's the case, since the American Idol has a penchant for wandering around her house jekkid as a naybird.

"I just like being naked," the singer apparently tells people visiting her home, a source tells the mag. That includes not only close friends (reeeeaall close), but also when her house is "filled with strangers for photo shoots or fittings."

Well, we suppose that depends on what people are taking photos of, and what kind of clothes she's getting fitted for. It's a good thing she didn't bust those moves out when she was meeting Pope Benedict XVI.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Ewan McGregor, Jim Carrey try Miami gay bar

Two Ewan McGregor items in the same week? Mrs. Juice* is thrilled! But maybe not, because the Miami Herald says the Scot was seen conducting "field research" with Jim Carrey and Rodrigo Santoro for their new flick, I Love You Phillip Morris.

Why is that too bad for her? Because Phillip Morris is a true story about a Texas convict who falls in love with his cell mate. And the research took place at Halo on South Beach, a pretty popular gay bar.

"Jim's character is a con artist and an escape artist, who escapes from prison to be with me," Ewan said. "It's an incredible story." Well, the missus can certainly appreciate that. Maybe this is the thing that give Carrey the Tom Hanks-style turn to serious films he's been hoping for -- it's been a long time since Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind made us think it was possible.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Jennifer Lopez is getting a reality show on TLC

Since that pesky childbirth thing is out of the way, Jennifer Lopez is getting back to work. The new mom is in talks with Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos about working with TLC on yet another reality show.

Jen will be executive producer and star in a doc series about beings an actress, singer, mom and mastermind of a new fragrance line, the Hollywood Reporter says.

"I think it'll be something very exciting," Lopez said. That makes at least one person.

Ripa and Consuelos, meanwhile, sealed a deal with the network that gives TLC first-look rights to any project their Milojo Prods company cooks up. It also give the Live With Regis and Kelly co-host a provision to host a series on TLC, in case you're just not annoyed enough.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Amy Winehouse out drinking once again

We love the British press, because while their libel laws are much stricter than American guidelines, they regularly trash celebs with such abandon we can’t help but read. Take Amy Winehouse: the Daily Mail says the singer went out for a “six-hour pub crawl” Tuesday night and got so wasted she had to break into her own house.

That part's believable enough, but the Mail says she went out with Mick Whitnall, guitarist in Pete Doherty’s group Babyshambles, and eventually “tried to punch and headbutt a man in the street before buying the early editions of yesterday’s papers and heading for home, where she had to gain entry via the garage,” the paper writes.

This after saying that earlier in the week she was wandering around getting high, and (get this) embarrassing her jailed husband, Blake Fielder-Civil.

“Blake will get stick about this from fellow inmates,” his mom Georgette Civil said. “Her behavior has spiralled out of control. She’s made a complete fool of herself and I hope my son divorces her.”

Yes, because Blake is such an angel. Isn’t he in jail on charges of threatening a witness to him beating someone? She's such a black sheep in this company.

[Photo: AP]

'Kill Bill' anime in the works, Uma Thurman says

If you totally geeked out on Quentin Tarantino’s Kill Bill double feature two years ago, you’ve got to be salivating at the thought of his two promised anime films featuring The Bride and Bill. MTV Movie Blogs got the scoop from the vengeful vixen herself, Uma Thurman, who says at least one of Tarantino’s flicks will blow us away.

“His anime stuff is strong,” she said. She said the film isn’t about The Bride, however, because she claims to have never recorded voice work for the upcoming release.

“It has nothing to do with me,” she said. “It has to do with another character. You’ll have to see.”

She also hints that the project will be available fairly soon, perhaps as part of an expanded DVD release for Kill Bill.

“Right now he’s putting the two films together with an intermission with an added anime sequence he had already written,” she said about the saga of Beatrix Kiddo. “So additional stories are in there, in animation.”

Just so long as it doesn’t make the O-Ren Ishii part of the story feel gimmicky, ’cause that part was a blast.

[Photo: Miramax]

Kardashians sell; Kidman's swell; O.J., go to hell

• Kim, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian joined smut peddler Joe Francis at Area nightclub in L.A. to launch the new Girls Gone Wild magazine, paparazzi sites point out. They must be trying to secure employment should their reality show go belly up.

• Nicole Kidman has been named a goodwill ambassador for the U.N. Development Fund for Women, which aims to raise awareness about global violence against women, the AP reports. Is she trying to tell us about her escape from the Cruise compound?

• O.J. Simpson has offered to appear on another season of Donald Trump’s Celebrity Apprentice, but the tycoon and NBC are rather wary, the New York Post’s Page Six says. Something about the wardrobe not fitting correctly, we’re guessing.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Did 'Gilligan's Planet' really happen?

We could look this one up, but we prefer to think it's some kind of mass hallucination via YouTube. And the answer is still Mary Ann.

Richie Sambora pleads no contest to DUI

Blame those East Coast deadlines (and our indifference) again, folks, but Tuesday was the day Richie Sambora pleaded no contest on a charge of drunken driving from a March 25 arrest in Laguna Beach, Calif. TMZ says a second DUI was dropped in a plea agreement with prosecutors.

You'll recall the Bon Jovi guitarist was stopped with his 10-year-old daughter, Ava, her cousin and Richie's girlfriend Jenn Mallini in the car. Sambora will pay about $1,600 in fines and penalties, must attend an alcohol-education course and is on three years' probation.

He blew a .13 BAC, which is almost twice the legal limit of .08, and yet he managed to weasel out of a charge of child endangerment. Police apparently recommended the charge, but prosecutors decided not to go after him. Last time we checked, driving your kid around while you're half-dead from alcohol may, in fact, endanger the child. But what do we know? We're not from California.

[Photo: AP]

Rocky, the bear from 'Semi Pro,' kills trainer

Rocky, the 7-foot, 700-pound grizzly bear that wrestled with Will Ferrell in Semi Pro, killed his trainer Tuesday, ABC News and the AP report. Stephan Miller, 39, was bitten on the neck while working with Rocky alongside two other trainers in Los Angeles and died before help arrived.

"He, unfortunately, bit one of the trainers," Maurice Moore of the San Bernadino Fire Department said. "A single bite to the neck, no aggression acts to follow. ... San Bernadino Big Bear City was the first on scene. They did CPR but to no avail."

The trainers used pepper spray to gain control of the bear, whom Miller's cousin and fellow trainer Randy Miller called "the best working bear in the business." In a creep factor of 8.5, Randy Miller told the San Bernadino Sun in February, "If one of these animals gets a hold of your throat, you're finished."

Darth Vader attacks new Jedi church in U.K.

A man posing as Darth Vader attacked a Star Wars fan who had founded a Jedi church in Britain, the BBC reports. Arwel Hughes, 27, from Holyhead, told a court he was drunk when he jumped over a garden wall wearing a black garbage bag and a cape, and shouting "Darth Vader!"

He admitted hitting Barney Jones with a metal crutch. A prosecutor said Jones had recently started the Jedi church, and it had about 30 members. Jones and his cousin had been filming themselves playing with lightsabers in the garden before the attack.

Police said Hughes had drunk the best part of a 10-liter box of wine and could not remember the incident. We're surprised he remembered who Darth Vader was.

[Photo: AP]

Star Jones getting divorced from Al Reynolds

It only took three-and-a-half years, but Star Jones and Al Reynolds are getting divorced, and are already separated.

"Several years ago I made an error in judgment by inviting the media into the most intimate area of my life," Star said in a statement to Entertainment Tonight. "A month ago I filed for divorce. The dissolution of a marriage is a difficult time in anyone's life that requires privacy with one's thoughts."

Yep, blame the media. Wait, aren't you a part of the media? We're more inclined to think the error in judgment was thinking she could afford spending $1 million on their wedding, but hey, it's no big thing. She's trying to stay positive at least.

"I have committed myself to handling this situation with dignity and grace and look forward to emerging from this period as a stronger, wiser woman," she said. The first thing she learned: Don't leave a hit morning talk show.

[Photo: Getty Images]

TomKat blow $100k on Suri Cruise's birthday

Think you're spoiling your kid? Think about poor little Suri Cruise, whose folks blew $100,000 on her second birthday party on April 18. That's five zeroes, mind you.

The New York Daily News and In Touch Weekly say Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes invited 24 people to an afternoon bash. Everyone got an individual designer cake in the shape of a hat bearing that person's name, with a butterfly and a daisy on the brim.

They also ordered $230 worth of cupcakes in flavors like lemon coconut and chai latte, in case that wasn't enough sugar. But the main event was Suri's four-tiered, polka-dotted cake, which was covered in yellow and white sugar butterflies. (Suri is into the butterflies, apparently.)

"They're very specific about what they like," said baker Jane Lockhart, owner of Sweet Lady Jane Bakery in West Hollywood, which made the cakes. "They wanted (Suri's) cake to look simple and childlike so they designed it themselves, which was kind of interesting. They brought in photos they had seen of butterflies and other cakes."

After eating an additional $45,000 in food from Wolfgang Puck and enjoying $17,000 worth of fresh flowers, the day gave way to an evening affair for TomKat's close friends, including David and Victoria Beckham, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, Eva Longoria Parker and Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy.

We're sure they all sat around the Cruise compound and discussed rising gas prices, health insurance premiums and global food costs as they were gorging on birthday cake and avarice. Why wouldn't they?

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