Katie Holmes going back to TV on 'Eli Stone'

Tom Cruise has decided to let Katie Holmes out of the house again, letting her add a guest shot on Eli Stone to her resume in addition to her Broadway stuff. Eli Stone co-creator Greg Berlanti, who was a producer on Dawson's Creek, worked her in, the AP reports.

"I went and I begged her and she said, 'I'd love to,' " Berlanti told a meeting of the Television Critics Association. He called Holmes "an incredible actress and a good friend."

Katie's episode will involve singing and dancing (ugh) and will air Oct. 21. She must be regretting bowing out of The Dark Knight right about now, eh?

[Photo: AP]

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Will Smith is supposedly a Scientologist again

We've said Will Smith was flirting with Scientology before, but Life & Style reports that the Fresh Prince was still up to his purported preachiness on the set of his upcoming flick, Hancock. Convenient that this comes out just as it's getting ready to open, yes?

"He gave out Scientology-like pamphlets at the end of the shoot," says writer Andrew Morton, the guy who was getting sued by Tom Cruise for writing an unauthorized biography about him last year. He's an authority, you know. "It's also been said that he and Jada are homeschooling their children in Scientology methods."

That probably comes from rumors that the couple are financing the New Village Academy in Calabasas, Calif., this fall. The school is supposed to have Scientology ties, but we don't go there, so we don't know. We do know the academy told the L.A. Times it's a nonreligious school, though.

The summation from Morton: “So between that, the pamphlets, the school in Calabasas, and his close friendship with Tom, it seems all the evidence leads one to conclude that he is a part of this organization.”

And by that logic, the fact that The Juice* owns a Tampa Bay Rays cap, attends games, watches them on TV and is a big Akinori Iwamura fan, means we'll be playing shortstop next week. It's true!

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Tom Cruise 'Valkyrie' pics might've been fixed

We thought for sure Tom Cruise had some movie called Valkyrie coming out, about German Col. Claus Claus Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg's assassination attempt on Adolf Hitler. And while that flick has had some isues in production, the latest hiccup is rumors about United Artists possibly doctoring publicity photos of the colonel to make him more resemble Tom Cruise.

At top you'll see an AP photo of von Stauffenberg and Tommy -- gee, separated at birth, right? UA then released a side-by-side profile comparison of the two, in which the colonel seems to be a tad different, especially concerning the width of the head and around the chin and eyebrows. Take a look:

And while you're perusing those pesky pictorial problems, Slate.com notes that Cruise is having issues with future projects, as well. It seems Paramount wants to make a Mission: Impossible 4 (why??), but only wants Tom to produce, not star in. What would we do without Ethan Hunt? Anyway, Tom turned it down. Probably because he was busy learning Photoshop.

[Photos: AP, United Artists]

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Tom Cruise thinks Dr. Drew Pinsky is a Nazi

It's no secret The Juice* likes Dr. Drew Pinsky, what with his helping of the people and all, so his comments about crazy in a Playboy interview caught our attention:

"A lot of people in the public eye who behave strangely have mental illness we can learn from, and much of it is based on childhood trauma, without a doubt," he says in next month's issue. "Take a guy like Tom Cruise. Why would somebody be drawn into a cultish kind of environment like Scientology? To me, that's a function of a very deep emptiness and suggests serious neglect in childhood -- maybe some abuse, but mostly neglect."

Well, the Cruise camp is having none of it. Tom's lawyer Bert Fields fired back in the New York Post, comparing the doc to a Nazi:

"This unqualified television performer who is obviously just looking for notoriety is so grotesquely unprofessional as to pretend to diagnose Tom and others without ever meeting them. He seems to be spewing the absurdity that all Scientologists are mentally ill. The last time we heard garbage like this was from Joseph Goebbels."

That'd be a great argument, except that Pinsky really is a doctor, who really does doctor things, and Cruise has often talked about his abusive father and nomadic upbringing. The truth hurts, we guess. But then, Cruise knows all about psychology already, doesn't he?

And of course, being the nice guy he is, Dr. Drew caved.

"(Dr. Drew) apologizes if his comments were hurtful," a rep tells Us. "Although Mr. Field’s intent is clearly to slander and discredit Dr. Drew, under no circumstances is Dr. Drew making a blanket diagnosis about Scientology nor Mr. Cruise whom he does not know. Dr. Drew was simply using Mr. Cruise as an example of someone who is recognizable to help the public understand. Again, Dr. Drew meant him no harm."

Sigh. Denial's not just a river in Egypt, right?

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Did Tom and Katie drop $400K on Suri's outfits?

Quick, how much do you spend on baby clothes each year? If you said, "A couple hundred bucks, give or take," fine. If you said, "My kid wears the same Lee Majors onesie I slept in until I was 8," that's understandable, too. If, however, you spend $350,000 to $400,000 on toddler clothes over a two-year span, well, then you're probably either (A) Tom Cruise, or (B) Katie Holmes. TMZ reports the couple has sent a cease and decist letter to luxury baby boutique Petit Tresor, alleging that the store blabbed about the ridonkulous amounts of money they've been spending on the wardrobe of baby Suri (who, we must admit, probably is the best-dressed baby on earth). The Cruises say the $350K-$400K figure isn't true, and it also violates the hallowed code of haberdasher-patient confidentiality. "It appears that Petit Tresor has 'leaked' this false information to the tabloids for the purpose of enhancing its image and obtaining a commercial advantage," says the letter, sent by one Aaron J. Moss. "This conduct violates our clients' rights of privacy and rights of publicity. ... Please do not say anything (whether true or false) about Mr. Cruise's and Ms. Holmes' shopping habits, consistent with your representation to the New York Daily News in December 2007 that 'We don't talk about any of our clients.' "

(Photo: Getty Images)

Katie Holmes wants another Tom Cruise baby

Forget all the bother about the baby bottle -- 2-year-old Suri Cruise may have a younger sibling in the works. E! Online says Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have been talking about calling the stork for another visit, according to the ever-present close source.

"She said she's got the itch," a friend said. "Now that Suri is more toddler than baby, she said she misses having an infant in the house. And, of course, she thinks Suri would make a great big sister."

Yes, she needs help if she's to topple Brangelina's wild bunch in a rumble. What does Tom think?

"He said if Katie wants to make another baby, she doesn't have to ask twice," the source said. "He always wanted more. It was Katie who has been holding off. Until now." How ominous that sounds.

[Photo: Here's TomKat and Suri at Saturday's MLS march between Red Bull New York and the L.A. Galaxy. On the right are Tom's kids Isabella and Connor, and in front are David and Victoria's spawn Cruz and Brooklyn. And they need more kids? Getty Images]

Should Suri Cruise still be using a bottle at 2?

Once again, our resident mommy member weighs in: Us magazine reports the shocking truth: Suri Cruise is still using a bottle at age 2. Tsk, tsk, the Parenting Police are saying -- that is so not cool, she must be a tyrant toddler who rules the house.

After the age of one or at least 18 months, all nipples (except for Mommy's of course) should go in the trash, and baby should be using a sippy cup or a straw or something that doesn't look like a child in need of a fake comfort object when in public.

Tom and Katie's constant traveling is considered a possible sticking point, since her schedule and sleep can be upset by all the schlepping and she could "regress" into self-comforting behavior, the baby doc quoted by Us says. And don't even get them started on kids who are still nursing at 2. Oh wait, we just did.

So, dear readers, we are buckling up our child-safety belts to protect our nether regions and asking: Should Suri still be using a bottle or should Katie be hitting the bottle more to deal with attacks like this? The comment board awaits.

[Photo: Okay, this is Suri last July, but what do you want? The girl is harder to photograph than Pablo Escobar. AP]

Sumner Redstone will tolerate Tom Cruise

Sumner Redstone, the 84-year-old crypt keeper at Viacom, has called off the fatwa against Tom Cruise, saying the rambunctious actor was welcome to star in a fourth installment of Mission: Impossible.

As you'll recall, Sumner was none too pleased with Cruise's couch-jumping antics, severing a 14-year-relationship with Tom in August 2006. He booted him off the Paramount lot and cut ties to Cruise's production company for future projects (Viacom owns Paramount). But all that has apparently changed.

"I consider Tom Cruise a great actor and a good friend," Redstone said. "And if Paramount decides -- and they will make the decision -- to move ahead with him, I will not object."

Which is great and all, but the controversial thing here is, there's gonna be another M:I movie? Jeez.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Are you ready for TomCruise.com?

Oh. Em. Gee. Apologies for all the e-mails and IMs we're no doubt missing today while we try to absorb the funhouse that is TomCruise.com, the official Web site of America’s Clearest Actor. Thank you, Pop Candy's Whitney Matheson, for alerting us to the presence of this oracle of Cruisedom, which launched Monday to celebrate the 25th anniversary of Risky Business. “I created this site as a thank you, to you, for sharing the journey with me and to invite you to continue to explore what the future will bring,” Cruise writes in an intro. “My hope with this site is to bring you in and share with you the fun I experience every day during the filmmaking process, from working on the script, to the making of the film through to what we finally see when we settle into our seats and the lights go down. This is for you.” It is not, apparently for Katie Holmes or the Church of Scientology, neither of which gets a shout-out in the actor's self-penned biography page. But even though the site is still pretty bare-bones, it does contain clips and photos from many of Cruise’s movies, and if the site’s intended purpose is to remind us that Cruise has made a hell of a lot of awesome movies over the years, well, it succeeds. The man can sure pick a blockbuster. Beyond that, we think there was a secret purpose to this site, and it was to make us snicker with joy at the sight of this still photo from his 1985 flop Legend:

You get 'em, tiger! We highly recommend you spend the rest of your day over there.

(All photos via TomCruise.com. That's three links! Don't sue us!)

Katie Holmes sent to Scientology boot camp

It's Wednesday already, and what would a week be without some completely inane Katie Holmes story alleging that Tom Cruise is brainwashing her and keeping her locked in a pantry in the basement of his Switzerland manse?

Star says Katie recently "endured" a three-day retreat at Gold Base, some Scientology camp in Hernet, Calif. Actually, they call it a boot camp, but we've never been there, so we don't know. It doesn't sound like fun, though.

"It included various tests, confession sessions, tons of reading and physically challenging purification processes," a Scientology source tells the glossy. "Tom insists that auditing and purification practices are incredibly beneficial to Scientologists at all levels." 

Apaprently these auditing sessions are a routine thing for her these days, since she's going to be moving to New York for a spell to act on Broadway and needs to be chipped like a wayward cocker spaniel. The mag says some sessions have lasted 36 hours with hardly any sleep or food. It's like watching War of the Worlds, complete with a ridiculous ending!

[Photo: AP]

Tom Cruise is going back on Oprah Winfrey

Get your Faker-E-Meters ready, because Tom Cruise plans on reliving his old couch-jumping days by going back on The Oprah Winfrey Show.

“Tom will be doing the Oprah show,” rep Julie Polkes told People. “He is really looking forward to it.”

His appearance will be a two-part extravaganza featuring a retrospective of his career since making Risky Business 25 years ago. Some of the interview will be in the studio, and some will be shot in Cruise's mountain retreat in Telluride, Colo.

His last appearance was in May 2005, when he totally shot down all hope of us ever liking him again. Actually, that happened when he lived through The Last Samurai, but that was only two years prior.

[Photo: Getty Images]

TomKat blow $100k on Suri Cruise's birthday

Think you're spoiling your kid? Think about poor little Suri Cruise, whose folks blew $100,000 on her second birthday party on April 18. That's five zeroes, mind you.

The New York Daily News and In Touch Weekly say Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes invited 24 people to an afternoon bash. Everyone got an individual designer cake in the shape of a hat bearing that person's name, with a butterfly and a daisy on the brim.

They also ordered $230 worth of cupcakes in flavors like lemon coconut and chai latte, in case that wasn't enough sugar. But the main event was Suri's four-tiered, polka-dotted cake, which was covered in yellow and white sugar butterflies. (Suri is into the butterflies, apparently.)

"They're very specific about what they like," said baker Jane Lockhart, owner of Sweet Lady Jane Bakery in West Hollywood, which made the cakes. "They wanted (Suri's) cake to look simple and childlike so they designed it themselves, which was kind of interesting. They brought in photos they had seen of butterflies and other cakes."

After eating an additional $45,000 in food from Wolfgang Puck and enjoying $17,000 worth of fresh flowers, the day gave way to an evening affair for TomKat's close friends, including David and Victoria Beckham, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, Eva Longoria Parker and Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy.

We're sure they all sat around the Cruise compound and discussed rising gas prices, health insurance premiums and global food costs as they were gorging on birthday cake and avarice. Why wouldn't they?

[Photo: Getty Images]

Katie Holmes wrestling Suri from Tom Cruise

Ever-popular rag Star is filling us in on the latest with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, since it's been days -- DAYS! -- since we've mentioned them, and the drama is building. The glossy says Katie may be using a shot at a Broadway revival of All My Sons to make her escape from the Cruise compound!

"She desperately needs to be on her own for a while, but there's no way Tom is going to let her take Suri away," an insider tells the mag. "There's no way he'll allow it. He just doesn't want Katie — or Suri — out of his sight for long. He told her that if she goes to New York, fine, but he goes with her."

Holmes has apparently been hoping that a move to Manhattan could be more of a trial separation, which we take to mean in a "wear and wig a dark glasses before hopping a Greyhound" sort of separation. Tom is sure sounding a lot like Sleeping With the Enemy, if we believe Star.

"Tom wants to call all the shots when it comes to Suri," another source says. "He has a lot of rules, and there's conflict." Maybe they're just fighting about how to celebrate Suri's second birthday on Friday.