Rob Kardashian is dating Lisa Ann, the 'Who's Nailin' Paylin' porn star

Oh, so you guys like the Kardashians so much? Well, how do you like the idea of Rob Kardashian hooking up with a porn star? How about if that porn star looked a little bit like Sarah Palin, according to Hustler honchos? Yeah, that's what we thought.

Lisa Ann, the skin flick celeb who starred in Who's Nailin' Paylin? (they've answered that one, finally), says the 22-year-old picked her up at the gym right around when sister Khloe was marrying Lamar Odom. Because any 22-year-old can pick up a 37-year-old porn star at the gym, you know.

"Rob treats me like his little teacher and we have a fun sexual relationship that is simple and carefree," she told TMZ. "He brings out the total cougar in me and I just like to teach him things."

This is just too much, even for The Juice*. The stark reality of how sleazy the Kardashians are is like a wintry blast of mace. This is just the pepper spray chaser.

[Photo: Rob with sis Khloe, Getty Images; Lisa Ann on the cover of her most famous movie.]

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Model Jessica White dated Sean Penn

We've said before that Natalie Portman may have been Sean Penn's rebound girl after a third try at divorce from Robin Wright, but now model Jessica White says she was the one who was out with the Oscar winner less than a month after he and Robin split. Wow, who will he eventually end up with, Helen of Troy?

The 25-year-old confirmed on Tyra Banks' talk show Wednesday the couple was together, but have since split up.

"Is Sean Penn your boyfriend? I saw you with him," Banks asks White (watch it above). "Can I say that? Is that okay, is that too much?" To which she responds, "No, it's not too much."

Tyra points out White was seen holding hands with Sean in September, and exclaims "She's dating Sean Penn!" But oh no -- "No, I didn't say that," White answers. "(We) used to. Past tense."

Other than that, we don't have much to say about the situation, other than the fact that Robin will have to start dating Taylor Lautner and Zac Efron to keep up.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Contestant on ABC's 'Wipeout' dies after stroke

A contestant on ABC's hit reality/game show series Wipeout died last week after having a stroke while performing a stunt, TheWrap.com reports.

Tom Sparks, a 33-year-old former DJ and production team member on Jimmy Kimmel Live, complained about knee pain during an obstacle two weeks ago and was sent off when producers noticed he was short of breath. He was taken to an L.A. hospital and later Cedars Sinai, where he required several brain surgeries before doctors determined so much brain damage had occurred and he couldn't be saved. He died Nov. 5.

Sparks was competing on the show with his wife of two months, Kate. His father, Bill Sparks, said that his son suffered from antiphospholipid antibody syndrome (APS), a disease that causes unnatural clotting of the blood, TheWrap says. Although Sparks was in good health and passed a physical for the show, such a disease would not be detected by normal tests.

“We offer our heartfelt condolences to the family,” a joint statement from ABC and production company Endemol read. “This is a tragic loss and our thoughts are with them at this time.”

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America's Next Top Model's Miss J Alexander is a dad

Juice*heads know we're big fans of America's Next Top Model, so we were really surprised to hear that judge and runway diva Miss J Alexander (a.k.a. Alexander Jenkins) is a daddy. At least that boy will really know how to work it in heels.

Alexander explained on The Tyra Banks Show that he and his ex-boyfriend, whom he only identifies as Alex, were asked to help a woman get pregnant. The result is a 7-year-old boy named Boris.

"A French lesbian had asked if we would be sperm donors," Miss J said on the show (watch the clip above). "So we thought, 'Okay, you want me to do you?' And she was like, 'Oh, I'm not that talented.' So I said, 'Okay fine.' So we did a little test tube."

It took three tries, and the big mystery was whose sperm the woman actually used the third time (it's a charm, you know). Since the kid was light-skinned, Miss J knew he wasn't the dad.

"I said, 'Oh, Lord. Thank God. No child custody hearings — he's yours," he said. The model trainer said he is still active in the child's life, even though he and the biological father have broken up -- who else would he watch the CW with?

Kim Kardashian gets black eye at boxing match, brother Rob gets a concussion

Kim Kardashian got knocked around pretty badly at the Kardashian Charity Knock Out in L.A. on Tuesday night, and we have the pictures to prove it! And although it really only looks like cheap mascara, we're thankful she escaped the clutches of Ryan Seacrest long enough to let us know what happened.

While Kim got a shiner, it sounds like her brother Rob was the one who got the worst of it: "When Rob stepped in the ring to fight, his opponent was at least 25 lbs heavier than him, even though the organization had assured us that they were screening the people we were fighting against and that they would be within 5 lbs of our weights!" she wrote on her Web site.

"At one point Rob's mask fell off and when he put his hands down he got hit in the face and ended up in hospital with a concussion. Rob's a strong guy and can definitely hold his own, but he wasn't expecting to get hit after his mask had fallen off! This guy just got really down and dirty!"

There's no word on how successful the even was, but that's why Seacrest is putting it on Keeping Up With the Kardashians. If only they would have let people punch the family in the face for $20 a pull, they'd make enough to cure diabetes.

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Alleged Ryan Seacrest stalker pleads not guilty

Chidi Benjamin Uzomah Jr., the alleged stalker arrested outside Ryan Seacrest's E! office building on Friday, pleaded not guilty Tuesday to a felony stalking charge. What, was he just trying to get the latest Top 40 playlist?

Uzomah entered the plea through an attorney. A court commissioner ordered Uzomah to stay 500 yards away from Seacrest if he is released from jail on $150,000 bail. Seacrest attorney Blair Berk filed a motion indicating that Uzomah had a knife when he went looking for Ryan. That doesn't look good, since he's on probation for fighting with a Seacrest bodyguard in September.

Uzomah is a sergeant with the Army Reserve 426th Civil Affairs Battalion, prompting an apology from Lt. Col. Nathan Banks to TMZ: "We apologize to Ryan Seacrest. Pending the outcome of the local investigation, the Army will decide what further action to take. We take all matters of our personnel seriously."

Uzomah appeared in street clothes during Tuesday's hearing and agreed to be represented by a public defender. He is due back in court Nov. 16.

[Photo: AP]

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Kardashian family in charity boxing match

Kim and Khloe Kardashian are among the members of the infamous clan stepping into the ring Tuesday night for a charity boxing match, Us reports. If only The Juice* were based on the West Coast!

The sisters, their brother Robert, stepfather Bruce Jenner and pregnant sister Kourtney's baby daddy Scott Disick are all pulling on the gloves at the Kardashian Charity Knock Out in L.A. We won't be able to share the outcome, because it's being taped for an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, so producer Ryan Seacrest is liable to slap gag orders on everyone involved.

"We actually got to see the people that we're fighting the other day and Kim's person scares me," Khloe said on Seacrest's KIIS radio show before the fight. "She's jacked." And when Khloe is scared of a girl, you know that's trouble!

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Eddie Murphy will be in 'America's Next Top Model' finale

We're big fans of America's Next Top Model, for some reason, but this season has been especially fruitful in providing us dirt. The CW has been trying to spice up the show, bringing in guest judges like Lauren Conrad and Kim Kardashian, so why not opt for a big name like Eddie Murphy for the finale? Try not to think about how he has nothing to do with fashion and go with it, okay?

To be fair, E! says he will not be a judge, but he will be at a Julia Clancey fashion show being used for the finale so he can cheer on his daughter Bria (pictured), who is appearing with the final two contestants on the runway. Whew, for a second there we thought that the CW was going to make a bad decision!

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Jon Gosselin, Octomom Nadya Suleman may be going on a date for TV

We tried to ban Jon Gosselin and Octomom Nadya Suleman, but the event horizon of media-generated gossip is upon us: The pair are going out on a date for a reality show, In Touch Weekly says. Repent, for the end is nigh.

"I heard that Nadya has an insatiable desire to spend time with Jon and to put their families together," former Cheaters producer Bobby Goldstein apparently told the mag, the New York Daily News says. "And I had the idea that this could be a very entertaining fiasco."

Mind you, both sides are denying this is in the works, but a press release says cameras will record Jon "as he contemplates what hooking up with Octomom could really be like. He's totally creeped out by the idea that if they got married, they'd have 22 kids."

We'd be totally creeped out by that, too, if it were true at all. Gosselin's manager told E! you shouldn't believe everything you read, thankfully.

"This is the first I've even heard of it," he said. "This isn't happening."

Note Goldstein is never quoted as saying it really is a factual, paid-for and signed-for show. And so we go back to trying our best to ignore this, and ruefully whimpering in a corner as we tell ourselves we're different from other gossip outlets because we make fun of morons like this. That's what we do, right? Right???

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Jon Gosselin wanted $12,000 to be on the MJ Morning Show

We know, we keep saying no more Jon Gosselin, but this one has a Tampa angle: Apparently 93.3 WFLZ's MJ Morning Show tried to get the Gozz on the air, but the deadbeat dad balked unless he got $12,000 for an hour of their time. Hey buddy, you need to pay us to listen to that crap.

MJ host Todd Schnitt and TMZ said Wednesday morning that Gosselin was offered two first-class round-trip plane tickets, limo service and decent hotel room, but Jon asked for an "appearance fee ... in the 10-12k range." Gosselin's talent rep, Matt Kirschner, defended the request by saying his "name and appearance on your show will instantly draw press ... and will be a high point for the show." Well, his not appearing has drawn the press, if only to ridicule the reality show staple.

On his show, Schnitt proffered that perhaps Gosselin needed the fee to help pay back the $180,000 he owes Kate. We say it's so he can buy more Ed Hardy t-shirts. Either way, it's certainly not to buy his kids ice cream. Can he even name all of them?

[Photo: Getty Images]

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