Let the Sopranos Mourning Begin

It's a more than a week before The Sopranos begins its final run of nine episodes, and I'm already bummed out.

Not just because I've seen the first two new episodes, provided to critics last week, and they seem about as tedious as ever (more on that in a future post). But because this series, when it was firing on all cylinders, was about as good as TV has ever been. And in a few months, it will be gone.

Tell you what won't happen: mob boss/star character Tony Soprano is not going down in a hail of bullets. And he's probably not going to get arrested, either. Creator David Chase and his crew have worked hard to confound every expectation for this series, so I'm no expecting it to end in a way that anyone can easily predict. (Check out this story on a roundtable discussion featuring all the actors who played notable characters who got whacked on the show, moderated by Bryant Gumbel)

  In a few weeks, I expect we will ask you all to chime in on how you'd like the series to end (feel free to get started in this space today). And I've got a way-cool analysis of the show's importance to TV itself set to run on Sunday -- it's pretty much the entire Floridian section -- complete with my list of the coolest deaths and most maddening loose ends.

To whet your whistle, here's some quotes from some well-known Sopranos fans that didn't fit in my Sunday story.

“The key, I believe, is the fact that he examines himself with a psychiatrist. That is the most revolutionary idea that they had – let’s get inside this guy…We know (Tony Soprano) in ways that we do not know other classic characters, including Hamlet and Stanley Kowalski...What they did that was so clever, was to permit us to go inside that office, where no one is permitted.”
--- James Lipton, host of Bravo's Inside the Actors’ Studio.

“What we admire about it is its consistency. It’s just consistently good and always getting better as the characters ripen and mature… One of the things we try to do is trust the intelligence of the audience…I think The Sopranos in a dramatic fashion has been a master of that --- understanding a reality of life and drama; that you don’t necessarily have to resolve every little thing.”
--- PBS documentarian Ken Burns.

“I get into arguments with people about this all of the time. After the first three episodes (of 2006), I was walking around saying all the awards are taken (by The Sopranos) this year – writing, directing, acting – its done. Now, I’ve spent the last four weeks saying what the hell is going on?”
--- longtime Sopranos fan and Rescue Me star Denis Leary.

“It’s like watching a car crash.”
--- James Gandolfini, from a 2002 press conference, explaining the appeal of Tony Soprano.

Clooney Denies Ratting Out Russell

I know, this is a film story. But Clooney's statement to the tabloid TV types that he had nothing to do with circulating the current video clip of Lily Tomlin and director David O. Russell's expletive-laden fight on the set of I (Heart) Huckabees, gives me an excuse to post this amazing spat here.

His statement, as reported by Extra: "Contrary to popular opinion, neither the sound man, Ed Tise, nor yours truly sent in the David O. Russell tape. I saw it when we were working on "Ocean's 12," and there have been quite a few copies traveling around town for the last couple of years. Any rumor that either of us put it on the internet is simply false. And I'd offer a million bucks to anyone who would prove otherwise.

Your fan,

George Clooney"

Here it is as embedded video:

 

Is There Anything Sadder...

...than watching a old guy who rules the world but can't handle five minutes on the dance floor? Read the story here...

Oh yeah, there is something sadder -- the truth behind this parody...

What We Call the News | Send To Friends | Funny Animations at JibJab

Idol Results Recap: Chris Loses Identity, Then Loses the Contest

It all started when he ditched the glasses.

Two weeks ago, American Idol contender Chris Sligh pocketed his trademark black-framed glasses to take a whack at Diana Ross' Endless Love. It was a clumsy attempt by a guy who had carved out a niche as the funny, nerdy vocal powerhouse to play in the big leagues, and try being a real heartthrob.

And it was awful.

So I wasn't surprised when the show handed the beefy South Carolina boy his walking papers tonight -- 24 hours after his worst performance yet, a surprisngly off-tempo Every Little Thing (She Does Is Magic). The guy had forgotten why Idol liked him -- the most dangerous mistake to make at this point, aside from forgetting your song lyrics.

The see-you-later montage they played after announcing Chris' loss said it all. Stocked with images from early in his time on the show, it featured Sligh's classic line about how he "just wanted to make David Hasselhoff cry." If only he'd held onto that I-know-I'm-scruffy-but-I'm-cute-and-funny vibe, he might have lasted longer. Or if he sang like this.

As it was, even DialIdol.com got this one right.

Worst of all, Sligh didn't even get to be the star of his own failure. That honor fell again to Sanjaya's hair -- or, rather, the memory of Tuesday night's poyntail faux-hawk -- which inspired host Ryan Seacrest to don a similar-looking wig for the show's start. As I was telling a reporter today from The Indian American magazine -- really! -- Sanjaya's success hasn't yet upset the applecart that is the American Idol process.

Indeed, if Sanjaya didn't exist, Idol producers would have had to invent him. Because he's keeping TV shows, newspaper columnists, web sites -- and yes, blogs -- talking about Idol at a time when the show is usually its snooziest.

We still have a few more also-rans to lose before this Sanjaya thing gets serious. Haley "Gams" Scarnato, Gina Glocksen (at left), Chris Richardson and Phil Stacey are still varying shades of mediocre; Sanjaya outlasting them on the strength of his personlaity doesn't say much. Stacey in particular seems vulnerable; he's landed in the bottom three at least twice before and seems no closer to developing an appealing onstage image -- which is what seemed to doom all those who have gone before.

And as more of the mediocrities hit the bricks, the overall performance quality goes up and Sanjaya's performances will only become more excruciating. Hopefully fans of other ousted singers migrate elsewhere and Sanjaya takes the long walk before a singer who really matters gets cut.

Hey -- at least let this old TV critic have some hope.

For an interesting Idol perspective -- backed by some actual reporting, believe it or don't -- check this cheeky story in Britain's Independent newspaper.

 

 

 

 

Dancing With the Stars and American Idol Recap: Bundling the Pain of Sanjaya and Paulina

I'm thinking he just doesn't give a crap anymore.

That's my conclusion after seeing the weirdly impressive faux-hawk hairstyle lovable loser Sanjaya Malakar came up with for Tuesday's American Idol performance episode. (click here if you can't make embedded video work)

Given how odd Tuesday's show was -- forced to perform songs associated with celebrity coach Gwen Stefani, the Idols were straining to find tunes with memorable melodies and decent vocal opportunities -- Sanjaya's towering column of hair was guaranteed to be the topic of discussion this morning on the morning shows and cable channels.

It's a typical Idol circumstance. Until the show shakes off the losers and gets down to the real contenders, fans must suffer through this circus, where those more, um, vocally challenged contestants try charm (Phil Stacey), sex appeal (Haley Scarnato) and outrageousness (Sanjaya) to extend their 15 minutes.

As usual, acid-tongued judge Simon Cowell had the two best lines of the night, telling Sanjaya "I presume there's no mirror in your dressing room," before noting "I don't think it matters what we say anymore."

How right you are, Simon. These are Idol's dog days; a peculiar sort of reality TV-fed hell made worse by the inability of Stefani to say much about the contestants beyond "stick to the melody" and "I can't wait to see how he/she does" onstage. No wonder they allowed contestants to sing songs that "inspired" Stefani, too; one run through Don't Speak and it's obvious -- her success is as much about washboard abs and a pin-up's smile than anything she's actually singing.

Sanjaya, clearly sick of all the jibes about his look and performance clocked in the equivalent of Britney going bald. It remains to be seen whether his small bit of televised rebellion endears him to the teenyboppers who are keeping him on the show, or finally puts him -- and us -- out of our misery.

My pal Lisa DeMoraes at the Washington Post sez Sanjaya's hair has already won the competition. And USA Today coins a way-cool name for those who can't get enough of the follically endowed man-boy: Fanjayas. 

Wonder what it would be like if Sanjaya had his own hair studio?

Dancing With the Stars Embraces it's Own Mediocrity

Is there any celebrity whose name says exciting, contemporary dance moves like Dionne Warwick?

That was the question which kept my brain spinning through the painfully awkward broadcast that was Dancing with the Stars first elimination episode last night.

I think it was about halfway through the show -- as the program''s professional dancers were gyrating through a super-cheesy rendition of Queen's already cheddar-filled pop hit Don't Stop Me Now -- that I began to feel like I was watching one of those outlandish parody production numbers occasionally presented on The Simpsons.

This episode had it all: a long-faded pop singer trotting out TWO inexplicably ill-fitting '70s hits; a clumsy attempt at building suspense by staggering revelations of which couples did worst; sprawling dance numbers which excluded the celebrities viewers ostensibly tuned in to see and a bloated, hourlong slot that left producers horribly, awfully achingly deseperate to fill time. 

Former E! correspondent Samantha Harris earned the Brian Dunkleman Award for lamest co-host on a reality show -- stepping all over super-smooth partner Tom Bergeron, stumbling over her lines and asking contestants variations on "How does it feel?" so often that Bergeron himself had to stop her from saying it when well-deserved loser Paulina Porizkova was finally announced. (how long before ABC suits realize the super-capable Bergeron is more than qualified to guide this train wreck by himself?)

And why, pray tell, was Chuck Woolery in the audience (and why wasn't he at least providing some kitschy drama by breaking into tears, like Hasselhoff)?

I can only pray ratings drop off enough that I don't feel obligated to relive the horror, week after week, documenting the slow decay of a TV audience who would rather watch Billy Ray Cyrus clomp around a dance floor than, say, a really cool Ray Liotta series.

Can Jennifer Aniston Save BFF Courteney Cox's Dirt?

Call it the biggest Hail Mary of this year's TV season.

Drowning in bad reviews and lackluster ratings (even though some critics were boneheaded enough to like the first few episodes), Courteney Cox's new drama about a hard-charging celebrity tabloid editor, Dirt, has been on most critics' life support lists for months.

So, to save her baby, Cox called on the biggest gun in her arsenal -- gal pal and former Friend Jennifer Aniston, who appears as a rival editor an ex-grilfriend (yeah, THAT kind of girlfriend). The show's finale presents the most naked grab for eyeballs I've seen in a while, with a highly promoted scene featuring Cox and Aniston smooching.

Down boys -- if only it were worth all the excitement. Perhaps as a metaphor for the confused state of the series, FX announced plans to send review copies of the episode, which airs tonight, to critics on Saturday. Mine arrived at my house yesterday, which means I was at work and couldn't watch it until last night.

Just as well. Turns out the Aniston/Cox smooch is just a friendly smack held a little too long -- extended even more with the help of generous slo-mo editing -- under-delivering on both the titillation and the story.

Dirt's biggest problem is one that has faced a heap of new series this season: Creating a character that is dark, complex and attractive to viewers is a lot harder than it looks.

Cox's hard driving editor Lucy Spiller is a perfect example. She's supposed to be a hardass who shows a softer side in dealing with her schizophrenic best friend, the magazine's ace paparazzo. But instead she comes across as a raving, egomaniacal bully who prints a brutal story about her brother's gay lover and lets her best friend cut his own pinkie off to get a photograph.

I could detail all the crazy stuff that goes down in tonight's season finale -- the way Aniston's sweet-as-pie backstabber of a character constantly upstages Cox in every scene; the way scenes with Spiller's paparazzo struggling with his mental illness feel airlifted in from another series; the queasy editing of a final, knife wielding fight between Cox's character and a celebrity who has had too much; the continuing sense that, as all the messy plot twists unfold, you are increasingly trapped in a star's misguided indulgence.

But that would be like kicking a celebrity while she's in rehab. Let's just say that you'll have more fun reading this mini review than you'll likely have watching the admirable train wreck that Dirt has become.

Check it for yourself (click here if embed doesn't work):

The Beginning of the End for The Sopranos: Starting Tomorrow

The PR push for the end of HBO's landmark Mob series has already begun, thanks to a compelling Vanity Fair profile and the pay cable giant's expert publicity machine.

My extensive tribute to the best series on TV runs in Sunday's Floridian. But to whet your whistle, i'm going to post a mini-review of the first two episodes of the show's nine-episode final run. that posting goes up tomorrw -- the earliest time HBO would agree to having material from the new episodes disseminated.

So tune in tomorrow, same Bat Time... 

   

 

Networks Showing Minority Correspondents More, But Is it Enough?

As you can tell by my Floridian column today about Paula Zahn, the subject of race and news coverage has been on my mind recently.

I've been told that I'm too tough on TV news operations, particularly when it comes to diversity issues. So I'll understand if some think I'm indulging in a little paranoia with this item.

But I was struck by a recent analysis for the Center for Media and Public Affairs noting 15 percent of all network stories were reported by minority correspondents and 28 percent were reported by women; the highest proportion of minority and female visibility since 2002. The representation more than doubled since 1990, when CMPA began studying the demographics of network news reporters.

BUT -- these numbers seem to only be half the story. The other half is one the networks keep to themselves; namely, what percentage of their staff is made up of racial minorties.

For instance, if 50 percent of CBS' reporting staff is female, then the fact that 34 percent of their stories were reported by women isn't such a great figure. If 20 percent of NBC's reporters are minorities, then CMPA's figures noting 15 percent of the network's stories were reported by minorities still falls short of the ideal.

I do know, thanks to a column I wrote last year, that CBS' proportion of black reporters is at 10 percent, which means the CMPA's finding that 15 percent of the network's stories in 2006 were reported by minorities may signal an achievement. Depending on how many other minorities work on the reporting staff, people of color may actually be getting face time beyond their numbers.

Of course, the real goal is to have a reporting staff whose diversity comes close to representing the community it primarily covers (at the St. Petersburg Times, that means our diversity level of about 15 percent is way shy of our core community's population, where 20 percent of residents are people of color).

It also means that the networks, which serve a country where about 30 percent of the population is people of color, also have a long way to go before their reporting staffs reflect the diversity of the nation.

See why people say I'm too picky?

Here's the release:

Study: Minority, Female Correspondents’ Visibility Hits High Water Mark

WASHINGTON, DC — Racial and gender diversity among reporters on the broadcast network evening newscasts matched its highest level since 1990, according to a new study by the Center for Media and Public Affairs (CMPA). The study found that the representation of both minority and female reporters has more than doubled since 1990, when CMPA began studying the demographics of network news reporters.

These are the results of CMPA’s seventeenth annual report on “Gender and Minority
Representation in Network News.” This report examined over 11,000 news stories
broadcast on the ABC, CBS and NBC evening news programs during 2006. CMPA began tracking “Gender and Minority Representation” in 1990.

2006: A Return to (Peak) Form: In 2006, 15 percent of all network stories were reported by minority correspondents and 28 percent were reported by women. This is the highest proportion of minority and female visibility since 2002, when minorities and women accounted for 14 percent and 29 percent of all stories aired, respectively. These figures are more than double those CMPA recorded in the first year of this ongoing study. In 1990 minorities reported only seven percent and women thirteen percent of stories aired on the evening news shows.

Steady as They Go — Minority story assignments remained steady at a record high (since 1990) of 15 percent in 2006, after jumping from 10 to 15 percent in 2004. CBS correspondent Byron Pitts was the most prominent minority, ranking 20 th of all reporters with 76 stories reported. ABC’s Pierre Thomas, NBC’s Jim Maceda and CBS’ Joie Chen and Randall Pinkston were the other minorities to crack 2006’s list of “The 50 Most Visible Network Correspondents.”

Venus Rising: For the second straight year, female correspondents saw an increase in story assignments, rising from 25 percent in 2004 to 26 percent in 2005 to 28 percent last year. ABC’s

Martha Raddatz was the most visible female news correspondent last year, ranking fourth with 112 stories reported. The other women who made the list of “The 50 Most Visible Network Correspondents of 2006” were CBS’ Katie Couric, Lara Logan, Sharyn Alfonsi, Sharyl Attkisson, Gloria Borger, Elizabeth Palmer, Trish Regan and Joie Chen; NBC’s Andrea Mitchell, Lisa Myers, Anne Thompson and Dawn Fratangelo; ABC’s Lisa Stark, and Betsy Stark.

CBS Tops in Minority, Women Reporters— At CBS, 15 percent of all stories were covered by minority reporters, while women reported 34 percent. NBC also assigned 15 percent of its stories to minorities but only 25 percent to women. The least diversity was at ABC, where minority correspondents covered 10 percent of all stories and women correspondents 23 percent.

Can NBC and MySpace Take Out YouTube? And the Crying Idol Girl Gets Her Own Taste of Media Overkill

Pay no attention to the flacks who keep insisting that the new advertising-supported, video Web site announced by NBC and News Corp. may be YouTube compatible and will work with the video-sharing Web site.

Make no mistake: This is another attempt by those who make high-priced video content to ensure that it mostly appears somewhere they can make money on it. And if it sticks a fork in YouTube, so much the better.

  And while this approach seems to be the carrot compared to the stick of Viacom's lawsuit against YouTube and its owner Google, the goal is the same -- making sure those who produce video content are the primary folks to make money from it. So far, content from NBC, NBC's cable channels and Fox's array of media properties will be feeding material thrugh Yahoo, Microsoft's MSN site, News Corps' MySpace and America Online.

But they'll be fighting some serious trends. Online consumers don't even have the patience for short commercials, so they may still prefer the wilds of YouTube, which doesn't place ads in the video content. And they need a wide array of programmning to make it work -- one of the reasons Google Video and so many other YouTube wannabe's never took off is because their selection of video is too limited.

Fox example: when I wanted a video clip of the crying 13-year-old who worshipped lame-o Idol contestant Sanjaya for this blog, the video was available within hours on YouTube -- before Fox even had pictures from the performance on its official Web site. Ditto with clips from Spider Man 3 aired on NBC during Heroes and bits from a review DVD given to critics of Fox's 1/2 Hour News Hour.

So thi new site's content needs to be available early -- hopefully, exclusively -- from a wide variety of programs with a minimum of commercial intrusion and a way easy-to-use interface, so people quickly build the habit of utilizing it. And they also have to hope Viacom's lawsuit hampers YouTube enough that all that ubiquitous content disappears and ans turn to them as an alternative.

Man. Sounds like an uphill battle -- even for the networks that gave us Twenty Good Years and Celebrity Duets. 

ONE MORE THING

Former WFTS news director Bill Berra keeps making headlines for his in-your-face style of local TV reporting. This time, one of his reporters at WTMJ in Milwaukee wound up inadvertently telling a woman her husband was dead before the police could. Berra has apologized for the circumstance. (thanks NewsBlues)

LITTLE GIRL OVERKILL

Because the actual competition sucks, are we surprised that media outlets all over the planet have jumped on Ashley Ferl, the 13-year-old girl whose tears for lame-o Sanjaya probably saved his skinny butt from elimination from American Idol? (thanks RealityBlurred!)

 

American Idol Recap: Stephanie Hits the Bricks, A Nation Scratches Its Head

Here's my most confident American Idol prediction: I need to stop predicting who will be ejected from American Idol.

Not just because I haven't gotten it right yet. But because these predictions keep bumping against one of my biggest peeves about the show: the lack of information on voting totals.

Last week, we were led to believe smiley-faced, non-singing urchin Sanjaya Malakar, cueball Phil Stacey and ejectee Brandon Rogers got the least amount of votes. This week, the worm turned with a new set of Idols at the bottom: ejectee Stephanie Edwards and Chris Richardson -- the JT clone who actually turned in one of the best performances Tuesday night.

Unfortunately, because viewers -- and journalists -- don't get any information on vote tallies, we have no idea how close the results actually were. Even Dial Idol, the site which predicts ejectees based on surveying users who employ their program to vote, named six possible ejectees this week (last week, they didn't even name the ejectee, Brandon Rogers, as a possible loser).

Dial Idol's bottom ranker was babe-licious Haley Scarnato, who remains one of the contest's weakest singers. If this were actually a singing contest -- or even a PERFORMING contest -- she would be at the bottom, right next to Sanjaya, Stacey and Gina Glocksen.

But middling singers like Edwards have discovered another brutal truth about Idol: mediocre vocal skills and a powerful image often trumps better singers with bland personalities.

It may make for great television -- NBC's Today show even had an interview this morning with the blonde, crying 13-year-old fan who probably helped Sanjaya avoid the chopping block -- but it makes for a lopsided singing contest.

R.I.P. Larry "Bud" Melman

Once of the worst results of David Letterman's move from NBC to CBS was the loss of Larry "Bud" Melman.

Sure, actor Calvert DeForest continued to appear on Letterman's CBS show using his real name, playing up his role as oddball upstart, reciting his lines with an awful lack of poise that was perfect for Letterman's satirical jibes.

But NBC legal suits ensured the Melman name -- which carried a perfect air of small-market TV mediocrity -- would stay at the network stupid enough to deny Letterman the honor of succeeding Johnny Carson for glad-handing workaholic Jay Leno. (See his first appearance, as the first face to appear on Letterman's late night NBC show, below)

DeForest stopped appearing on the show back in 2002. But it still hurt to hear that he had died Monday at age 85 (You don't want to know how many beer bongs I had to drink in college timed to his manical laughs).

Letterman, who had already missed a show taping due to a stomach flu, issued this statement about Larry "Bud": "“Everyone always wondered if Calvert was an actor playing a character, but in reality he was just himself - a genuine, modest and nice man. To our staff and to our viewers, he was a beloved and valued part of our show, and we will miss him.”

Thanks for all the laughs Larry.

   

ABC Surprise: Brothers & Sisters, Men In Trees and Boston Legal Move Off the Bubble

ABC's announcement today that it will pick up 11 series for the next season wasn't surprising for the long shots it gave new life -- including Sally Field's family drama Brothers & Sisters and William Shatner's oddball attorney show Boston Legal -- but for the series it didn't mention.

Disappointing comedies George Lopez, According to Jim, Knights of Propserity and In Case of Emergency were all missing from the renewal list, along with the female-friendly drama What About Brian and the convoluted drama Six Degrees. Since the new drama October Road just debuted last week, it may be too new to draw conclusions.

And the three or four Jimmy Kimmel fans still out there can rest easy that rumors he might be pushed out for an hourlong Nightline are not yet in play -- at least for the 2007-08 season.

Here's part of the press release:

   ABC Television Network today announced fourteen early pick-ups for the 2007-08 season for new breakout series “Brothers & Sisters,” “MEN IN TREES” and “Ugly Betty,” as well as returning hits “The Bachelor,” “Boston Legal,” “Dancing with the Stars,” “Desperate Housewives,” “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition,” “Grey’s Anatomy,” “Jimmy Kimmel Live” and “Lost.” The announcement was made by ABC Entertainment President Stephen McPherson at the March Development Meeting in Los Angeles. These series join previously announced “America’s Funniest Home Videos,” “Supernanny” and “Wife Swap,” which have also been renewed for the 2007-08 season.

American Idol Recap: It's the Songs, Stupid

It's an interesting paradox: last night's British Invasion edition of American Idol produced some of the show's best performances from some of its weakest competitors -- even Chris Richardson's Timberlake-style whine and Blake Lewis' white-guy beat boxing were tolerable servicing songs such as Gerry and the Pacemaker's Don't Let the Sun Catch You Crying and Time of the Season.

The only problem: the Idols didn't often pick great songs for themselves.

Lakisha singing Diamonds are Forever? (points for trying to break out of the Aretha-diva mold, sister, but you can't just sing ANYTHING on Idol, no matter how talented you are)

Phil Stacey on Tobacco Road? (ejection road is more like it) Stephanie Edwards presenting the quirky You Don't Have to Say You Love Me?  Don't these knuckleheads realize the point is to pick songs that show off your vocals skills?

Haley Scarnato cemented her status as the hottie Idol -- bouncing around the stage in short shorts and a top tight enough to keep her in the running a few more weeks.

And poor Sanjaya sung the idiot-proof Kinks anthem You Really Got Me well enough to stick around another seven days (didn't hurt that his sparkling smile made a young girl cry on camera, though the best Idol crying moment remains this one.

Lakisha's insistence on tackling Shirley Bassey's classic James Bond anthem Diamonds are Forever highlighted the biggest problem of this contnually lopsided contest -- the front-runners' biggest danger comes only from their own bad choices.

If, for some odd reason, you should want to hear some of these performances again, they're available as MP3 downloads here.

Should go tonight: Sanjaya. If Fox was still doing the kiddie Idol show American Juniors, he'd be perfect there.

Will go tonight: Phil Stacey. The weird bald guy who looks like a German vampire gets a stake through his heart -- felled by a song that every bar band in America has tackled once or twice.

Dancing with the Stars Recap: We Eat the Cheese So You Don't Have To, Edition

My main thought while slogging through last night's two-hour, live Dancing with the Stars premire this morning on the office TiVo: Is there any modern TV show as willfully cheesy as this one?

  Of course, ABC's hit dance/reality competition defines star rather loosely. Heather Mills, for example, wasn't introduced during last night's live show as a former model, or for the real reason anyone knows her name -- that she's the former Mrs. Paul McCartney dancing with a prosthetic leg (on camera, she's a "charity campaigner").

Since ABC announced the celebrity lineup, it's the two questions most casual observers had: Will she mention Macca? And how will she handle twirling and kicking with a fake leg?  (answer so far: no and okay)

In typical network TV fashion, they pushed her dance nearly to the end of the two-hour live show, sending her out on the floor in an ankle length dress with a routine that avoided most of the jumps, leg points and splits that women use to spice up their performances. (Of course, the judges couldn't say any of this, because it would look like they were kicking an amputee while she was trying -- so expect lots more boring routines that no one will directly criticize because they don't have the testicular fortitude of Idol grump Simon Cowell) See her routine and judge for yourself below.

So far, the Jerry Springer Two Left Feet Award goes to -- big surprise! -- one-hit country music wonder Billy Ray Cyrus, who drew snickers during his time on the music charts for his awful dancing in his own music videos (now, he draws snickers because he's known mostly as Hannah Montana's dad -- and there's so many photos around of him in this chees-tastic mullet).

He was followed closely by former Cheers star John Ratzenberger, who stalked his Polish hottie dancing partner on stage like the creepy uncle you always avoid at wedding receptions. But at least the voice of Mr. Potato Head had an excuse -- because he was replacing drop out Vinnie "Big Pussy" Pastore, he only had half the time anyone else did to rehearse.

Worse than American Idol, Dancing with the Stars is that most awful of reality shows: so steeped in BS that snide criticism seems redundant, and yet popular enough that some attention seems warranted. My guess: Ian Ziering and Joey Fatone are the early favorites, but most folks will just be watching to see if Mills' leg falls off.

Now THAT's quality television.

(of course, click on any of the wonderful photos from ABC's publicity department to see them larger)

 

Happy Birthday Iraq War: Four Years In, Have the Media Learned Anything?

It was a bold headline, advanced by the new, in-your-face CBS Evening News with Katie Couric: It is "only a matter of time" before U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales loses his job in the scandal over the firing of eight prosecutors.

What a difference four years can make. Back then, it seemed the Bush administration could do little wrong, bathed in the glow of 9/11 and the power of the perception that Republicans were efficient, effective and vengeful. Now, more news outlets than ever are calling for a pullout from Iraq in the wake of increasing violence.

I think pundits tend to overemphasize the complicity of the press from this time. There were voices speaking out against war even as troops advanced to Bagdad.

But major news outlets, swayed by the Bush administration's certainty and fears of looking unpatriotic, jumped into embedded positions with U.S. military units and got swept along in the frenzy (one study noted less than 1 percent of voices on nertwork news shows advanced anti-war ideas in February 2003 before the war). And one journalist, former MSNBC star Ashleigh Banfield, saw her career stalled after complaining about "horrors that were completely left out of (war news coverage)."

Even the Washington Post has apologized for it's editorials cheerleading the drive into war with Iraq.

Here's a few choice quotes from that time, courtesy of Fairness and Accuracy in Reporting:

"Tommy Franks and the coalition forces have demonstrated the old axiom that boldness on the battlefield produces swift and relatively bloodless victory. The three-week swing through Iraq has utterly shattered skeptics' complaints."
(Fox News Channel's Tony Snow, 4/13/03)

"Some journalists, in my judgment, just can't stand success, especially a few liberal columnists and newspapers and a few Arab reporters."
(CNN's Lou Dobbs, 4/14/03)

"Chris, more than anything else, real vindication for the administration. One, credible evidence of weapons of mass destruction. Two, you know what? There were a lot of terrorists here, really bad guys. I saw them."
(MSNBC reporter Bob Arnot, 4/9/03)

"Congress returns to Washington this week to a world very different from the one members left two weeks ago. The war in Iraq is essentially over and domestic issues are regaining attention."
(NPR's Bob Edwards, 4/28/03)

"What's he going to talk about a year from now, the fact that the war went too well and it's over? I mean, don't these things sort of lose their--Isn't there a fresh date on some of these debate points?"
(MSNBC's Chris Matthews, speaking about Howard Dean--4/9/03)

And It's Getting Worse....

I did a story some time ago about efforts to keep track of the war dead in iraq, a process made more difficult initially by the U.S. government's unwillingness to keep a tally of civilian dead. One of the Web sites I wrote about, Iraq Body Count, has now released its own analysis of the last year's conflict, concluding the past year is the most deadly ever.

On every available indicator the year just ended (March 2006 – March
2007) has been by far the worst year for violence against civilians in
Iraq since the invasion:

- almost half (44%) of all violent civilian deaths after the initial
invasion phase occurred in the just-ended fourth year of the conflict

- mortar attacks that kill civilians have quadrupled in the last year
(from 73 to 289)

- massive bomb blasts that kill more than 50 people have nearly
doubled in the last year (from 9 to 17)

- fatal suicide bombs, car bombs, and roadside bombing attacks have
doubled in the last year (from 712 to 1476)

- one in 160 of Baghdad's 6.5 million population has been violently
killed since the beginning of the war, representing 64% of deaths
recorded so far.

 

 

Why the YouTube/Viacom Suit Really Matters

News pages this week were filled with news that YouTube's closest partner, CBS owner Viacom, had turned on the video sharing site -- putting its foot down in a $1-billion lawsuit over the cutesy way it has avoided responsibility for all the unauthorized content filling its pages.

In the process, Viacom is challenging two important ideas championed by YouTube that symbolize how digital media is totaly destabilizing more conventional media systems.

Number 1: That media content should be freely available to users whenever they want it. The problem with this approach is that it costs money to create content, and when those who create it don't get paid, they won't be creating content for long.

YouTube has tried to be cute about this distinction, claiming it will remove content whenever copyright owners complain -- well aware that popular video clips will be uploaded continually by users, and the lag between complaints and removal will ensure users can access all the unauthorized content they want.

Big media companies tolerated this as long as they could -- CBS even had its own channel on the service. But in the end, they realized a simple truth that sunk the music industry: train the audience to believe your content is free, and you'll never get them to pay for it again.

Number 2: That companies which help users pass along copyrighted content for free aren't doing anything wrong. I love the convenience and utility of YouTube as much as the next web surfer, but it -- and many other media sites -- are based on an ethic that is killing media businesses. Somebody has to pay for media content, and the constant devaluing of stuff that takes lots of time and money to develop only dooms the future of the medium.

DEGGANS PunditWatch tonight on Florida This Week:

Look for me tonight on Rob Lorei's WEDU show Florida This Week, discussing election results, voting machine irregularities and the proposed settlements in the death of Martin Lee Anderson.

Idol Update: More News Than You Can Stand Edition

There's so much new Idol info coming my way this afternoon, I decided to break it out in a separate post after all.

For example, RealityBlurred.com, my fave reality TV Web site, notes a couple of things about Idol worth considering.

Dial Idol may be full of it. Despite accurately predicting last year's winner, the web site -- which offers software to automatically dial in users' votes, tabulating all the votes it casts to predict winners and losers -- was way off Wednesday night. While admitting it could only predict that three contestants were safe, Sanjaya was one of them, ranked third to fifth. Brandon and Phil Stacey, the three guys at the bottom of the voting according to last night's show, were ranked third and fourth but within the margin of error for ejection.

Ratings are down for final 12 from last year. Despite drawing 29.4-million viewers Tuesday, ratings were down from the semi finals and down 15 percent from last year. Variety and Media Life magazine blame Daylight Savings Time, which reduces the amount of time people spend in front of TVs. I blame a lackluster field of finalists and the backlash from weeks of Idol hype.

Simon Says He's Bigger than the Boss

CBS has released some more material from the metrosexual summit of the year, Anderson Cooper interviewing Simon Cowell for 60 Minutes. In the latest tidbit, Cowell says he's worth five times Bruce Springsteen's worth to Sony BMG -- in the process confirming every crappy thing critics have said about how Idol is ruining the music business.

“I sell more records than Bruce Springsteen,” Cowell says of Springsteen, who signed a contract with Sony BMG  reported to be in the neighborhood of $100 million.  “In the last five years, I’ve probably sold over 100 million records. If [Springsteen] got 100 [million dollars], I should have got 500,” he tells Cooper.

            How does he sell 100 million records?  “By doing ‘Idol’…I signed the biggest artist on the planet and it’s called ‘Idol’ because every single ‘Idol’ winner is now signed through Sony BMG,” says Cowell.   “And this applies to…all the countries…we sell ‘Idol’ to, which is over 30 countries,” he says.

Cowell’s deal with Sony BMG is also said to be in the same neighborhood as Springsteen’s.   “A hundred million…that’s a great deal,” he tells Cooper, who then asks, “For [Springsteen] or for you?”  “For him. For him it’s a good deal.”

See his other controversial clip here:

            In the 60 MINUTES profile, Cowell answers critics who say he’s bad for the record industry, discusses his perceived cruelty to contestants and actually gets the tables turned on him when a group of judges critique him doing something he is passionate about.

Brandon Hits the Bricks on Idol - Along with My Patience

Lost isn't the only popular TV show I don't understand.

That's a tough admission for a professional couch potato to make. And it's a little overblown, because I knew all the little kiddies who love to run up big text messaging bills for mom and dad have taken American Idol misfit Sanjaya Malakar to heart like the ageless pixie he is.

But even though Brandon Rogers kept proving week after week why he's the perfect backup singer -- competent, bland, good looking, but not distinctive enough to stand out from the, um, background -- he didn't deserve this. Losing to a guy who should have been axed weeks ago.

So, as Sanjaya slunk offstage Wednesday night -- well aware that his new school Leif Garrett vibe bought him another week on Idol his pipes haven't earned -- Brandon was left to finish his final tune and wonder if Christina A. needed somebody else in the pit for her next tour. Our only consolation: Sajaya was in the bottom three this week, a solid indication his days are numbered.

Brandon's fate also proves there is but one cardinal sin on Idol, and it's not a pornographic past -- it is forgetting the lyrics (unless, like another hanging-by-her-fingernails finalist Haley Scarnato, you have a smoking body to distract viewers and judges).

UPDATE: RealityBlurred.com, my fave reality TV Web site, notes a couple of things about Idol worth considering.

Dial Idol may be full of it. Despite accurately predicting last year's winner, the web site -- which offers software to automatically dial in users' votes, tabulating all the votes it casts to predict winners and losers -- was way off Wednesday night. While admitting it could only predict that three contestants were safe, Sanjaya was one of them, ranked third to fifth. Brandon and Phil Stacy, the three guys at the bottom of the voting according to last night's show, were ranked third and fourth but within the margin of error for ejection.

Ratings are down for final 12 from last year. Despite drawing 29.4-million viewers Tuesday, ratings were down from the semi finals and down 15 percent from last year. Variety and Media Life magazine blame Daylight Savings Time, which reduces the amount of time people spend infront of TVs. I blame a lackluster field of finalists and the backlash from weeks of Idol hype.

Who's leaving next? As the risk of embarrassing myself further, I'm still hoping the San-man takes a walk next week. Our homeboy from J-ville, Phil Stacey, also seems header for Loserville, a victim of astonishingly bad fashion choices, bland performances and a look stuck somewhere between Uncle Fester and Nosferatu.

And, speaking of being lost by Lost, can you believe Jack's dad is also Claire's father? Or how geeky Jack looks chasing after a football (check out what i'm talking about here)? These guys better start making sense soon or I'll be forced to switch to - gulp! -- CSI:NY.

Idol Thoughts: The First Performance By the Dull Dozen

Some things that crossed my mind while watching my TiVo'ed episode of American Idol in the office this morning:

-- Sean Daly, crowded into the office with me, calls clueless amateur Sunjaya at 21st Century Leif Garrent. I compare him more to John Stevens, the redhead with the grandma-loves-me haircut whose popularity in 2004 led him to advance way further than his performances warranted. When Sunjaya made the top 12 last week he had he same "holy shit!" look that Stevens wore for too many weeks during his edition.

-- Gotta agree with my pal Verne Gay at Newsday: There is the Idol that happens when Melinda Dolittle and Lakisha Jones take the stage, and then there is the Idol that everybody else competes in. These two women are so obviously more talented than their compatriots, the only question left is whether Idol voters will punish them for being too good, too early. Melinda takes a pedestrian song like home and turns it into a tour de force, and Lakisha can redefine songs sung by the best singers.

-- Enough with the gay jokes already. Ryan asks Simon about advice on high heels, Simon tells Ryan to get out of the closet already. Let's just declare both you guys metrosexual and get over it, already.

-- Chris Sligh needs to realize his charm is in being the lumpy funny guy who is a little geeky wit a hidden, amazing talent. Enough with the psuedo-hip rock arrangements and ditched glasses -- just play up your natural good humor and stop trying to be Chris Martin.

-- The guys are also in another Idol contest, and it sucks. Even the best dudes -- Sligh, Phil Stacey and Blake Lewis come off as earnest dudes who would be really good in the Katonga show at Busch Gardens. Last night, Lewis was the best example -- coming off like a junior Justin while warbling through a take on The Supremes' Keep Me Hangin' On that would have KILLED at the Disneyland Parade of Dreams. Idol needs artists who can hang with the Neptunes and Timbaland, not Mickey and Goofy.

-- Do Diana Ross, Sunjaya, Justin Guarini and Sideshow Bob have the same hairdresser?

-- Can Idol survive a season where the best singers are so obvious so early on?

Final analysis

Should leave: Sunjaya. Because, frankly, his smile is the only thing keeping him in the game.

Will leave: Rock chick Gina Glockson. Because she does't really want to be in the rock chick bag idol is forcing her into and it shows every time she wlaks onstage.

Simon Does 60

Will the I'm-not-gay-I'm-just-metrosexual banter reach a fever pitch as Cowell faces the most closeted journalist on TV, Anderson Cooper?

Tune into his feature this Sunday on 60 Minutes and find out (See Simon make an argument for advertising sponsorship of televised executions here)

Nice to see the Tiffany Network moving to fill the journalism void left by the passing of Ed Bradley with such high-caliber work.

 

FCC Announces Public Hearing on Media Ownership in Tampa

Do you think too few companies control too many media outlets?

Do you worry about the effect on public discourse when 80 percent of an area's radio outlets are controlled by three companies or the same corporation owns the largest TV station, the Number Two newspaper and one of the biggest web sites in town?

Well, now you have a change to express your concerns in person. Because the Federal Communications Commission has announced it will hold a public hearing April 30 in the Tampa Bay area on the issue of media ownership.

In 2003, the FCC held just one public hearing before voting to loosen media ownership rules, but the new strictures were deemed impractical by a federal appellate court and sent back to the agency for revamping.

Since then, FCC chair Michael Powell (Colin's son, right) has been replaced and the new cheese Kevin Martin has promised six public hearings on the issue. The Tampa area hearing would be the fourth, and will likely draw hundreds of people concerned about the impact of allowing too few corporations to control too much of the country's big media outlets. (See some reports on the Los Angeles hearing here.)

I wrote about this issue back in 2003, when the FCC's actions created an unlikely alliance of conservatives concerned about the rising explicitness of big media and liberals concerned that left-wing political discourse would be limited even more thasn it already is by profit-focused companies.

Something tells me they're going to get an earful in the Tampa Bay area.

Midseason TV: More New Shows Already?

I know: You've barely figured out whether Deal or No Deal is a bogus waste of time (answer: it is, but we really don't care), and already they're throwing more shows at you.

The problem, is that you're not watching well-intentioned, if off-base efforts like Friday Night Lights, Knight of Prosperity, Scrubs and Men In Trees. So, like a organ grinder's