If there's a crisis in network television, somebody forgot to tell ABC.
Despite a brutal current season which laid waste to promising new shows (Cupid, The Unusuals, Life on Mars) and hopeful sophomores (Samantha Who?, Dirty Sexy Money, Pushing Daisies), the alphabet network announced a fall schedule this morning featuring six new dramas, four new comedies and a new reality show.
There's big stars such as Courteney Cox as a new-school Mrs. Robinson (Cougar Town), Kelsey Grammer as a laid off corporate executive (Hank), Patricia Heaton as a middle-class Indiana mom (The Middle) and Billy Zane as the head of a cutthroat Los Angeles law firm (The Deep End). There's remakes of old movie and TV shows (Eastwick reworks The Witches of Eastwick, while V retells the old '80s-era miniseries about an alien invasion of the same name.) St. Petersburg Times book editor Colette Bancroft weighs in on Eastwick, vis-a-vis John Updike.
There's even a full night of new shows lined up on Wednesday nights, as if audiences had never heard of Criminal Minds or American Idol's results show.
It's all ABC's attempt to sell advertisers on the notion that, more than a year after the Hollywood writers strike has ended, it's business as usual in the network TV business. Nevermind all the technology and changing audience tastes that are disintegrating the industry.
"It's been about two years since we had a normal pilot season, and it's great to be back to doing TV with a full slate of pilots," said Steve McPherson, president of ABC entertainment group, on a conference call with reporters this morning. "I think there's going to be an optimistic mood out there -- much more optimistic than is being written about."
Of course, one reason ABC has a full slate of pilots, is because so many new and returning shows failed this season. And even some of the shows renewed for next season, including the quirky comedy Scrubs, returning for a ninth season, and equally eccentric corporate comedy Better Off Ted, performed badly enough to be cancellation candidates right down to the wire.
Some highlights from McPherson's talk:
-- Jim Belushi is finally out of a job. According to Jim, the mediocre zombie spawn of a show that never seems to die, draws its last breath June 2 after eight (?!) seasons. We think.
-- ABC will not confirm whether actors T.R. Knight or Katherine Heigl are returning to Grey's Anatomy; the finale left both characters' fates in the air.
-- Star Zach Braff is expected to appear in six of the first 13 episodes of Scrubs' next season. Despite the fact that executive producer/creator Bill Lawrence is also working on Cox's Cougar Town, he's trying to decide if he will totally reinvent Scrubs or just introduce a new cast to the hospital.
-- Lost star Elizabeth Mitchell may appear on that show and the V remake (left), even though her character appeared to die in the Lost season finale.
-- Ugly Betty moves to Fridays, which may be a disastrous move for the show.
-- True Beauty, that awful reality show about inner and outer beauty, was actually renewed.
-- Scrubs, Better Off Ted, Lost and True Beauty are all held over until midseason.
Click below to read capsule descriptions of all ABC's new shows.
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