Catscratch Fever

Pussycats, Pussycats, I Love You...

I really like those Pussycat Dolls.

And not just in an obvious grunty, slobbery, pathetic-guy way (although there's definitely that).

But I also dig the sextet's pure cabaret-kitty burlesque routine, real Space Age-meets-vaudeville cool dripping in kitsch and go-girl 'tude. If you're too concerned with the fact that only one of them has vocal talent, well, you're totally missing the point.

Anyway, I caught them at the USF Sun Dome last night, opening up for the Black Eyed Peas. The Peas were fine, but in retrospect, I would have been cool leaving after the Dolls set. They were that good.

Anyway, here's a chunk of my review from today's paper, but with annotated comments. Think of it as a randy director's commentary.

Born in 1995 as a wink-wink burlesque act (the brainchild of choreographer Robin Antin, they were actually born in Christina Applegate's garage), the L.A.-based Pussycat Dolls promote titillation over talent. (Such celebs as Eva Longoria, Carmen Electra and Christina Aguilera have also " cameoed" with the Dolls.)

Only one of the women is an actual pro singer: raven-haired frontwoman Nicole Scherzinger (formerly of forgettable Destiny's Child ripoff Eden's Crush). But a serious lack of vocal skills hasn't stopped the group from selling several million copies of their debut album, 2005's PCD. (I gave it a B, but I should have slapped a "+" on there.)

With Nicole working the mike, the other Dolls -- Kimberly, Ashley, Melody, Jessica and Carmit (Carmit sounds like something you'd buy at Pep Boys, doesn't it?) -- excelled at writhing on catwalks and stripper poles, chairs and stairs. They were all not-so-dressed dressed in clothes that looked like something from the Beyond Thunderdome collection.

(I should have said something earnest about their athleticism and dance skills. That was the whole point of the Pussycat Dolls in the first place: Good hoofers mixing Bob Fosse moves with Sunset Stripper sin. Melody's signature move last night was standing on one stilletto heel, and slowly putting the other leg behind her head. I can't wait to bring her home to mother.)

Why, the entire cheeky affair was like a no-contact lapdance.

(OK, this was a cheap line. I should have added on to it, perhaps with a mention of the "history lesson" in the middle of the set, in which Nicole explained the troupe's genesis -- then did this drop-dead sexy routine to Henry Mancini's Pink Panther theme. I believe it's in Charlie's Angels 2 when Drew and the girls pay homage to the Dolls and do a begartered strut to the same brassy tune.)

And I'm not ashamed to say I loved every gosh-darn moment.

Especially because, as a nice bonus, the Pussycat's songs are sincerely catchy, especially Beep (produced by the Black Eyed Peas Will.i.am no less), Wait a Minute and, of course, Don't Cha. (All together now, ladies: "Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? Don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?")

Comments

[Sparky]

Daly, you're a luck, lucky man. You actually call what you do work? LOL! You're probably sitting there right now in a cheesy Hawaiian shirt, Bermuda Shorts and a pair of loafers.

[Sean Daly]

Yesterday was Cheesy Hawaiian Shirt Day.Today is Black T-shirt, Jeans and Stan Smiths Day. Very edgy.

[Anonymous]

is there any actual burlesque in tampa bay, if so where?

[Sean Daly]

Sadly, you're idea of "burlesque" and Tampa Bay's idea of "burlesque" are probably quite different. However, if you in fact meant "fake-breasted porn girls writhing on some weezy middle-aged golfer's lap," well then Tampa Bay, my friend, is gonna treat you just fine.I'll put out some feelers for actual "burlesque."

[chilledbongo]

the dept of homeland security is watching you