The Imaginary Friend

So I'm giving Kid Lulu a bath, planning a shampoo sneak attack, which will inevitably lead to both of us screaming, crying, hurling accusations. Right before I descend upon my 3-year-old's ridiculous mop of awesomely thick hair, I hear her mutter something under her breath.

"What's that, honey?" I ask.

My daughter sighs and gives me a sympathy chuckle. "I wasn't talking to you." She motions to absolutely nothing. "I was talking to M&M."

Oh lord, her imaginary friend. This started a few months ago. He just kinda showed up. From what I can tell, M&M is neither the confection nor the incendiary rapper. He's very, very small and really enjoys Bob Evans breakfasts. He gets scared on roller coasters. He's emotionally unstable, as Lulu is usually trying to talk him off some sort of emotional ledge.

M&M also really enjoys the Forever Fiancee's cleavage, as he's often spotted in the vicinity of her chest.

From a psychological standpoint, I'm not too worried about the presence of M&M. He seems like an affable sort. If Lulu ever gets that Omen look in her eyes and demonically hisses, "M&M doesn't like it when you wash my hair. M&M says Daddy better sleep with one eye open," well, that's when you lock up the silverware.

What I do worry about is that my daughter (aka She-Hulk) is well on her way to being "the weird kid." And the imaginary friend sightings ain't gonna help. But I'm taking a certain pride in her imagination. I really am. And I figure with both M&M and I backing her up, the kid will be fine.

So today's playlist, "The Me, Myself and M&M Mix," is proudly dedicated to my daughter and her wee invisible pal:

The Great Pretender -- the Platters
You're My Best Friend -- Queen
I'm Looking Through You -- the Beatles
Imagine -- John Lennon
You've Got a Friend in Me -- Randy Newman & Lyle Lovett
Invisible Touch -- Genesis
Friends in Low Places -- Garth Brooks
Spirits in the Material World -- the Police
Don't Stop Believin' -- Journey
Thank You for Being a Friend -- Andrew Gold

Comments

[Marissa]

Think of your daughter as unique and wonderful. She's not the weird kid. Too much pressure is put on kids to be just like everybody else. That actually screws us up more than finding a niche and revelling in it. My own son has never been just like all the other kids, but he's finding comfort in knowing he's a stand out. They write novels and movies about the kids who refuse to fit into the norm. Those people are what makes the world far more interesting than the pod people.

[Erin]

How about The Beatles Nowhere Man?

[The Mouth]

Don't the Lemonheads have a song called "Imaginary Friend"? And two Velvet Underground songs come to mind: "She's My Best Friend" and "I'm Sticking with You."

[tracy]

You forgot my favorite imaginary-friend song -- "Nobody Knows But Me" by Billy Joel. One of his weirdest and silliest songs!

I got a friend that nobody knows, nobody knows but me
I got a friend that nobody knows, nobody knows but me
Ooh, mama please don’t tell it to myself again
I know she thinks I’ve fought up my mind
But I’m a-really telling to my secret for real, but we get along just so fine

[DG]

"Little Ghost" - The White Stripes
"Even Better Than the Real Thing" - U2

[Sean Daly]

There's your winner right there:

"Even Better Than the Real Thing."

Brilliant, DG. I thank you, and M&M thanks you.

(Tracy, are you sure you're not hallucinating?)