REVIEW: Jordin Sparks

When we first fell in love, big-boned cutie Jordin Sparks, last season’s incandescent American Idol champ, was a teenage goofball with a showbiz-savvy voice. There wasn’t much edge to her, but there was an unmistakable intangible something, and that’s what mattered. I was smitten.

But when the inevitable Idol concert tour came to Tampa — and a nightmare of an amateur-hour it was, too — Sparks headlined with a terribly blah run-through of yawners. Despite the fact that she was begowned in flowing dresses and smiling aplenty, Sparks, in a live setting, failed to hold an arena stage.

Maybe the 17-year-old was having a bad night? Maybe the FLA humidity had wilted her charms? Alas, no. Sparks’ self-titled debut is also a milquetoast R&B affair, Rihanna without the bite, Beyonce without the beats. She even borrows some of Hannah Montana’s people, but lacks the tween-pop kick and ’tude of the Disney star. If Miley Cyrus has taught us anything, it’s that there’s a big difference between G-rated and boring.

As a singer, Sparks is certainly capable; hers is a dimple-cheeked mid-range belt. On TV she displayed a genuine ability to handle such standards as I (Who Have Nothing) and You’ll Never Walk Alone. And indeed, for a showstopping span of 30 seconds on new rock ballad Permanent Monday, she teases you with highwire vocal power.

As for the rest of the album? Sigh. Her new pop songs aren’t very catchy or nuanced. Hardly anything gets faster than midtempo, so forget about slumber-party dancing. No Air, a duet with Chris Brown, mimics the “ella-ella-ella” effect from Rihanna's Umbrella, a perfect example of the creativity vacuum. Even hot producers StarGate, who helm first single Tattoo, can’t muster memorable moments.

I hate to say it, but it’s enough to make you wonder if Sparks’ unmistakable intangible something was nothing but a made-for-TV parlor trick.

Comments

[Marissa]

I really have high hopes for Jordin. I think she appeals to females much younger than you and I, Sean. There's a formula (it seems) to these post American Idol CD developments. I don't know who wrote most/all of Jordin's songs, but I'm guessing the ripped them out in a week's time. The poor kid has no say at this point in her career.
Katherine McPhee's CD seemed forced and took her too far from her natural range and bordered on screechy. Not to mention the songs were just stupid.

[Bassnote]

Katherine McPhee always was screechy. Of all the former idols, she is the one I loathe the most.

I couldn't disagree with you more. WOW. I was at the show in Tampa, & she sounded absolutely amazing. She was flawless!! I was so in awe of her that night. & as for her album, it is by far the most incredible album I've ever heard. I know everyone has a right to his/her own opinion, but I am so disgusted by yours that I don't know what else to say. & I just had to state my opinion as well.