REVIEW: Soulja Boy, Chris Brown

TAMPA - This wasn't a concert. No, this was a sixth-grader's iTunes playlist. This was a slick series of cell phone ringtones. This was video fodder for YouTube fanatics who sate their musical jones through snippets and sound bites.

Who needs substance and cohesion when style, flash and one-and-done accessibility is the currency of the mall, the schoolyard, the dance floor? At the St. Pete Times Forum on Monday, a who's-who of young hip-hop acts, chart-toppers all, unloaded a bevy of disposable hits, occasional flashes of talent and a whole heap of 'tude to a pumped-up crowd of 8,793.

Critiquing this one as a regular gig was missing the point. (Although having a youth-oriented show run until midnight on a school night was lousy form. I feel you, mom and dad. I really do.) This was a grab bag, a variety show. To make a tour like this profitable, you have to stuff the lineup with as many names as possible. So if you didn't like one hit, another was on its way soon enough.

[Times photo: Brian Cassella]

Backed by a DJ set up on a rickety fold-out table, Atlanta's Shop Boyz opened the show - and were given just enough time to perform their smash, "Party Like a Rockstar," which mixes a little grit, a mudslide of bass and just as much swagger. The trio is emblematic of the current music biz: "Party Like a Rockstar" was a massive hit on radio, on cell phones, on iTunes - but the album from which it came, "Rockstar Mentality," was a relative bust.

The hottest act of the night was Chicago's Soulja Boy, who has managed to turn his 15 minutes into an international phenomenon. The lanky 17-year-old has the world dancing to the song "Crank That (Soulja Boy)," a step-by-step tutorial in silly fun that's also raunchy as heck.

So Soulja Boy came out, rapped a few forgettables, including current ballad "Soulja Girl." And the throngs were appreciative enough. But when those ubiquitous steel-drum strains of "Crank That" kicked in, the entire venue (preschoolers and high schoolers, moms and grandmoms) immediately started dancing in unison. It was awesome. They'd "crank" this way, "Superman" that way. If they also "supersoaked," well, I don't want to know about it.

Remember when Ohio's Bow Wow used to be "Lil"? Well, he apparently doesn't. Neither does he feel the need to foster the family-friendly vibe he conjured in kid flick "Like Mike." Bow Wow is a man now (well, 20 at least), and he worked the stage like a hardened rapper. If his segment was the loudest (sheesh, there were more pyro explosions than a "Die Hard" movie), it was also the least musically engaging. The crowd cheered more for his hunky stage banter than his cookie-cutter rhymes. But they did perk up for such bouncers as "Take Ya Home" and "I'm a Flirt."

Eighteen-year-old Chris Brown has been dubbed the next Michael Jackson, which might be half right. The Virginia native's brand of synthy, bumpy R&B is safe, G-rated and entirely so-so. But the King of Pop comparisons aren't so crazy when you consider his athleticism. Brown didn't show his baby face until 10:20, when he opened with the hit "Wall to Wall" from new disc "Exclusive." But he never failed to be watchable, Fred Astaire in a skullcap, sliding and gliding all over his multitiered stage.

Brown knows his strengths, too, giving as much attention to his feet as his voice. His coolest flurry of footwork was an old-school danceoff, as Brown gave a loose-limbed lesson in dance moves from hip-hop's past to present. He also dazzled with a Gene Kelly-inspired routine to Rihanna's "Umbrella." If you missed it, don't worry. It'll be on YouTube tomorrow.

Comments

[Marissa]

I feel for you on this one, Sean. I don't know what sounds worse to me; Hannah/Miley concert or the Souja Boy posse extravaganza. Probably the latter since it went on WAY past my bed time ... 6am comes mighty early!

[Bassnote]

Oh the crap you must have to endure Sean. I am so sorry.

[jane]

Dude. Lo siento.

Makes you appreciate Sir Tom all the more, doesn't it.

[Sean Daly]

I feel the love, peeps. I do. But alas, my lousy mood will have to continue for a few more hours.

[Bassnote]

Right now 'Crank That (Soulja Boy)' is at the top of my list of songs I would like to nuke out of existence.

[Necy]

This concert was amazing! Chris Brown did so good! I didn't want him to leave. I hope he comes to the St. Pete Times Forum again soon! Because I enjoyed myself and I love Chris Brown!

[sharron sloan]

Now Marissa and Sean..you must know how hard it would be for me, a 54 year old die hard R & B fan, to sit through a Celine Dion or Barbara Streistrand concert. All the hip hop kids prior to Chris Brown would probably get on my nerves too, but Mr. Brown's talent, personality and charisma would make it worth the wait.
And just wait until you see him in his upcoming movies, this young man is creativity at its best, he sings, he dances, he acts, he's an excellent artist and basketball player...plus, humble and down to earth !!

[sharron sloan]

Now Marissa and Sean..you must know how hard it would be for me, a 54 year old die hard R & B fan, to sit through a Celine Dion or Barbara Streistrand concert. All the hip hop kids prior to Chris Brown would probably get on my nerves too, but Mr. Brown's talent, personality and charisma would make it worth the wait.
And just wait until you see him in his upcoming movies, this young man is creativity at its best, he sings, he dances, he acts, he's an excellent artist and basketball player...plus, humble and down to earth !!

[sharron sloan]

Now Marissa and Sean..you must know how hard it would be for me, a 54 year old die hard R & B fan, to sit through a Celine Dion or Barbara Streistrand concert. All the hip hop kids prior to Chris Brown would probably get on my nerves too, but Mr. Brown's talent, personality and charisma would make it worth the wait.
And just wait until you see him in his upcoming movies, this young man is creativity at its best, he sings, he dances, he acts, he's an excellent artist and basketball player...plus, humble and down to earth !!

[sharron sloan]

Now Marissa and Sean..you must know how hard it would be for me, a 54 year old die hard R & B fan, to sit through a Celine Dion or Barbara Streistrand concert. All the hip hop kids prior to Chris Brown would probably get on my nerves too, but Mr. Brown's talent, personality and charisma would make it worth the wait.
And just wait until you see him in his upcoming movies, this young man is creativity at its best, he sings, he dances, he acts, he's an excellent artist and basketball player...plus, humble and down to earth !!