Live Idol: Do-It-Yourself Freak Bashing
Hey Party Stars! Tonight's Idol installment is basically a clip job, a melange of laffy leftovers from all of the tryouts. You'll probably get a few legit talents, more than a few wackjobs and a video montage of Abdulian faux pas. (But really, Paula's legs? Driving me frothy, I tell you.)
Next week is Hollywood (finally!), which means we'll be breaking out the big blog guns. So tonight, Spears and I will be partying in the Pop Life comments section, which many have likened to the Playboy Mansion if the Grotto were overrun by doughy white guys. So bring a towel, some Funyuns and a whole lotta sunblock.
We're also relying on Bassnote, Jane, maybe even Miss Riss to offer their own crack commentary. Or just offer crack. 'Cause nothing's better than chasing the dragon and making "Seacrest is short" jokes.
See you at 8 p.m.!
Sean Daly is the pop music critic for the St. Petersburg Times. His CD collection -- from Journey to Dylan, Prince to U2, Public Enemy to Stan Getz -- is much bigger and better than yours.
Hey! I'm not on duty tonight. So, I might very well get to partake in the bafoonery that is American Idol audtions.
I was Googling a few of the contestants mentioned last night, and I stumbled upon potential spoilers for those who made it to the Top 24. I don't recognize any of them.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 04:47 PM
No crack, but I will be fortified with Grey Goose & tonic. Lots of lime.
Actually wasn't going to watch tonight -- I'm oh-so-tired of these bloody auditions -- but I'll be a (wo)man, venture into the Grotto and chime in.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 04:48 PM
PS: Nice Grotto shot. ¿Dónde está Hef?
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 04:54 PM
First of all, I had to change the picture of the Duck Girl, cause she was scaring the ever-lovin' s--- outta me.
Spearsy and I figgered tonight could be lame-o-rama. But we're obligated by law to continue the Idol charade.
HOWEVER, if you have the scoop on the Top 24, Miss Riss, I'd love to hear it.
Plus Steve has promised to wear his ecru Speedo into the Grotto. He says he'll be giving "free cannonballs," whatever that means.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 04:56 PM
Ah, Mr. Daly -- I've got the scoop on the rumored Top 24 as well. You want it here or in an e-mail, unless the ever-efficient Miss Riss has already sent it along...
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 05:00 PM
Hey, the other day, Spears mentioned something about putting together a Stuck in the '80s cruise (bands, parties, sexy snorkeling, etc). Could be a hoot.
So even if you don't watch Idol, bring ideas for the potential '80s cruise.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 05:00 PM
Wait! Drop the top 24 goods tonight. It's a good talker. Plus I gotta go get Kid Lu from school now.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 05:03 PM
Will do -- it'll be interesting to see if Miss Riss and I have the same intel info.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 05:07 PM
Why is it when you say "Chase the dragon," I think more of Steely Dan singing about drugs than the actual drugs? Just a thought.
Posted by: DG | February 06, 2008 at 05:52 PM
Just waiting for the familiar strains of the AI theme song to come on... la la la.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:00 PM
"God gave me my voice." ~ Tiffany
Simon ~ "Does he have a return policy?"
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:07 PM
As someone who has sung in her fair share of church choirs, it makes me giggle when "singing in my church choir" is used as a line on their AI audition résumé -- believe me, not everyone who sings in the choir can actually sing. Their hearts might be in the right place, but they hold up the concept of "making a joyful noise."
Bless Tiffany's heart.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:09 PM
"What is your ethnic background?"
Can Paula ask that? Seriously, isn't that an HR no-no? Akin to "Can I see your tan line?" or " That's it, honey. Do a little dance for Daddy."
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:10 PM
I'm here, but on tape delay.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:10 PM
As a tease for next week, did you see homeless car boy sobbing in Hollywood? He might want to hit Jiffy Lube before he motors back east.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:11 PM
I knew, as soon as she said her voice was from God, that Simon was going to have a field day with her.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:12 PM
Hey ladies -- spill the goods on the top 24!!!
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:12 PM
Glad to see that "ethnic background" girl wore her "see these? pick me!" shirt today. Sean probably experienced puberty again when he saw her.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:12 PM
what a skanky little tramp.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:12 PM
I'm here... did I miss anything??
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:13 PM
do you want the link or the list?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:13 PM
Guys:
1. Chikezie Eze
2. Colton Berry
3. Danny Noriega
4. David Archuleta
5.David Cook
6. David Hernandez
7. Garrett Haley
8. Jason Castro
9. Jason Yeager
10. Luke Menard
11. Michael Lee Johns
12. Robbie Carrico
Girls:
1. Alania Whitaker
2. Alex Lushington
3. Amanda Overmyer
4. Amy Davis
5. Brooke White
6. Carly Smithson
7. Kady Malloy
8. Kristie Lee Cook
9. Ramiele Malubay
10. Syesha Mercado
11. Joanne Borgella *99% sure
12. Asiah Epperson *99% sure
according to idolforums.com
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:14 PM
http://idolforums.com/index.php?automodule=blog&req=showblog&blogid=938&st=
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:16 PM
Carla!!!
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:16 PM
Ashley, god taste in pets, bad taste in boyfriends. Can't sing worth a darn.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:17 PM
I meant 'good' taste.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:18 PM
Bassnote!!!
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:18 PM
Ashley, was pretty bad! Dog was too cute, but we'll pass!!
Marissa!! Hey woman!!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:19 PM
Hey! It's Chaka Khan!
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:19 PM
Marissa!!
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:19 PM
A love triangle from North Carolina? Normally that means Skoal, Kodiak and Copenhagen.
Or BBQ ribs, chicken and pork.
But these three people -- Ashley in particular -- are seriously making me want to saw my head off with a butter knife.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:19 PM
STEVE!!! Tape delay man.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:20 PM
"Yeah, yeah, let's wear the yellow shirts!" Shouldn't twins stop dressing alike once they graduate pre-K?
Marissa, ask the question about that girl and the twins that I can't ask as an employee of a family newspaper? You know, the menage question?
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:21 PM
Those three knuckleheads from NC. Good grief. That poor dog.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:22 PM
Uh, anybody up for a 3 some?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:22 PM
wait, I'm not really ASKING.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:22 PM
My 24 spoiler list -- same as Miss Riss.
Who ARE some of those people?
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:23 PM
I know Steve's fetish chick he went ga ga for is on there.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:24 PM
Not sure I recognize any of the dudes on the Top 24. But Kristie Lee Cooke is the blond hottie cagefighter with a heart of gold. Amanda Overmyer was hot biker chick from last night.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:24 PM
is that girl singing in English?
I'm having a hard time understanding her. What?! Size is always an issue for me, too, honey.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:25 PM
Chaka Khan.. chaka khan..let me rock you chaka khan
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:26 PM
I wonder why Simon said no to Joanne.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:26 PM
Goth Nurse is going all the way. And I'll drive to Hollywood and be seen crying in the audience when she's singing "Master and Servant" to clinch the title.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:27 PM
Oh Alicia... please stop! Just stop!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:27 PM
HELIUM Goddess
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:28 PM
Love the plus-size model from Hoboken. If there's a Daly Dream Girl, it's that Mandisa-meets-Beyonce look. Her name's Joanne -- didn't catch her last. Could that be the girl in the Top 24? Help me, peeps! Make my dreams come true!
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:28 PM
Ryan! Don't sing!!
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:29 PM
Agreed Sean, Joanne was great! And beautiful!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:29 PM
Sean.. SHE is IN the top 24
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:29 PM
I like these big bootied chicks getting thru. Fat bottomed girls make the world go 'round.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:30 PM
Please don't give her a second chance!
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:30 PM
Bassnote, they have an hour to fill. Of course they'll let her try again.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:32 PM
Oooh -- Michael Lee Johns is that hawt Aussie that auditioned in San Diego.
I have no idea why I remembered that...
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:33 PM
here's the list complete with pictures of the alleged top 24
http://idolforums.com/index.php?automodule=blog&req=showblog&blogid=938&st=
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:34 PM
You make my dreams come true, Marissa...
Okay, who's ready to go in the Grotto?
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:34 PM
Peroxide better step away from the Dolly. I knew she was trouble when she was curling her eyelashes using her cell phone as a mirror.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:34 PM
Round two.. I need to puke.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:34 PM
I'll tip toe around the edge, Sean.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:36 PM
Yeah, awful... and she looked like she was in pain.
They always have to put someone through that CAN'T sing!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:36 PM
Grotto time already? Hell, yeah!
As long as I can bring my Grey Goose, I'm there.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:37 PM
MY EYES! MY EYES!! MY EYES!!!!!!
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:37 PM
I'm gonna call myself. Rissgruv
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:38 PM
Did I miss the whole Grotto thing?
Sean knows they call my pool the Grotto 'round these parts.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:38 PM
J Smooth - gonna flop.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:38 PM
'Round what parts? who's parts? Huh?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:39 PM
LOL Marissa!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:40 PM
Told ya J Smooth was toast.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:41 PM
My outdoor pool ... here in St. Pete. Was I that vague?
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:41 PM
No, Steve. I understood St. Pete parts. lol I'm going to go dive in head first now.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:42 PM
No Steve... you just know how some of the minds work around here. Don't worry, Marissa, I was right there with you!!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:43 PM
Reason #17 why I love my DVR: FF right through J Smoove. Which enabled me to open yet another beer. (Out of lime, so no GG&T tonight.)
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:43 PM
Thank you, Carla.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:44 PM
This is a travesty. Marissa tiptoes around the Grotto when I'm there. But all of sudden she's doing jacknives to hit the pool with Spears. This is an outrage!
And it's J SMOOVE, dammit!
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:45 PM
No worries Marissa... we've already discussed how GMTA -- ours do at least!!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:46 PM
I have my Diet Pepsi. No booze around here. I never think to buy it. If I do have anything it's some Mike's Hard Lemonade I picked up at the Shell station.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:46 PM
But Sean, remember you were already IN the pool when I dove head first. Think about it. eh, eh?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:47 PM
J Smoove, J Smooth , who gives a ^^^^, he's history.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:47 PM
oooh sing me some Luthaaaaaaah
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:48 PM
The pool's too cold, but the hot tub is a cozy 100 degrees. I just checked during a G&G break.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:50 PM
Jakeezee? He can sing though.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:50 PM
Uh, uhm... hot tubs and I have a history. I better stick with the diet pepsi.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:51 PM
He was a little off at first, but once he got going .... Jakeezee (sp) was pretty good!!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:51 PM
Chikezie Eze. He's personable.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:52 PM
Yeah, Hot tubs... I got a history too... but not one that I need to stay away for!!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:52 PM
I think my tv has a speech impediment.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:53 PM
Chichen Itza did a nice job with that Luther song. Nice smile too -- quite endearing.
And I'm trying to figure out what a "G&G break" is, Mr. Spears... Gin & Gatorade?
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:53 PM
Hey Carla, I'm glad to see you're safe and sound. Were the twisters anywhere near you?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:54 PM
Hey! Daniel looks like Hannah Montana in boy drag.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:55 PM
Anyone catch Eli Stone last week? I'm lovin' George Michael again. ... Can't believe I just said that.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:55 PM
Sent you a message on myspace... yeah, all is good here. Storms passed to the west and north of where I'm at. Still heard sirens going off all night. My dogs were scared... but other than that...all's good!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:56 PM
Marissa LOL!
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 08:56 PM
I have Eli Stone sitting on the DVR... is it worth a watch?
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:57 PM
I'm guessing Eli Stone is a television show?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:57 PM
According to our Top 24 list, Chikezie gets in, as does this Noriega kid.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 08:57 PM
NO sex allowed!!!
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:58 PM
I had to go check the list to make sure that the Noriega kid's first name wasn't Manuel. And it's not. Whew.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 08:59 PM
You know it's Gin and Gatorade! The drink that hydrates while it dehydrates!
Also called a Limey Gator. Or, "breakfast" some days.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 08:59 PM
well, poop! it's over already? I was just getting started!
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 08:59 PM
Jane.. i'm with you, I Tivo'd the Eli Stone show, haven't watched it yet... but am looking forward to seeing George again!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 08:59 PM
Whenever I see these people crying I want to turn into Tom Hanks
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 09:02 PM
Booyah for me for guessing the Spears Drink du Jour. LOVE the Limey Gator name. But you probably figured that.
Gin and I don't get along, so I can't say that I've ever had one -- although I've had Vodka and Gatorade... which would be a Russian Gator, da?
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 09:02 PM
Hey, does anybody remember the Clearwater girl's name? Did she make the Top 24 list?
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 09:03 PM
I watched the first Eli show right before Idol. Good stuff.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 09:03 PM
Toon was the Clearwater girl, and she's not on the list. Bad for us here in Tampa Bay.
Posted by: Steve Spears | February 06, 2008 at 09:05 PM
Me too, Carla -- although Jonny Lee Miller (aka the first Mr. Angelina Jolie) is the primary appeal for me. George is just a bonus.
What did we do before TiVO/DVRs -- they make life so wonderful.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 09:05 PM
There's a girl from Miramar, FL, but I don't see Clearwater
Hokey SMokes! A girl from Cedar Lake, IN. That's like 30 mins from here
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 09:05 PM
Carly Smithson is the Irish girl who made it to Hollywood a couple of seasons ago but couldn't go because of visa issues.
Asiah Epperson is the sweet girl whose daddy was killed in the car accident.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 09:07 PM
I don't have TiVO or a DVR.
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 09:07 PM
Yeah Jane... they are great!! But truthfully, about Eli Stone, I only really wanted to watch it because of George Michael! He was too sexy, back in the day!
Posted by: Carla | February 06, 2008 at 09:08 PM
Oooh -- Alexandrea is the girl with the fab great-grandmother who didn't want to cry because they were taking pictures.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 09:08 PM
Carly Smithson is gonna be a monster in this. What's the deal with her? Wasn't she signed to RCA or such and was dropped? I think she's been with a major label -- but apparently that's not a disqualifier.
Hey Spears, where's Miramar, FL? Should I start tracking down this girl's mother for the requisite "She was singing in the womb" quote?
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 09:11 PM
Miramar = Miami area.
And yeah -- I think Carly had a recording deal -- may have even cut an album but it went nowhere. Obviously.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 09:13 PM
Is anyone watching this "Truth" game show?
Posted by: Marissa | February 06, 2008 at 09:18 PM
Thanks, Jane. I think I'm safe for now. But you just know Miss Miramar has an uncle in Indian Rocks who's gonna be calling me 24-7.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 06, 2008 at 09:19 PM
Yeah -- she's in the Miami Herald's jurisdiction.
And doesn't everyone have an uncle or cousin in Indian Rocks? Seriously.
Posted by: jane | February 06, 2008 at 09:21 PM
Just wanted to try out my stage name.
Posted by: DJ-EZ Cheesy Chikezie | February 06, 2008 at 10:21 PM
Okay, I just watched Eli Stone online. Loved it. I'm going to be listening to some George Michael tonight.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 06, 2008 at 10:52 PM
Hey! Thanks to Bassnote's viewing of Eli Stone online, I followed suit. Excellent! I love Dr. Chin the accupuncturist. I believe we have a new hit.
Hey Sean, are you missing "Pushing Daisies" as much as I?
Posted by: Marissa | February 07, 2008 at 12:04 AM
Sorry I missed the party. Double technology whammy last night: No sound on Fox, no Internet connection.
It's hell out here on the frontier!
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 07, 2008 at 07:37 AM
You were missed, Jeff in Cuba. In fact, I ran into a Pop Lifer the other day who said, "Jeff in Cuba is HILARIOUS!"
In fact, it's just a matter of time before you guys start your own spinoff shows: "Everybody Loves Jeff," "After Dark With Miss Riss" "Mad About Bassnote."
Remember, I get 10 percent of the merch sales...
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 07, 2008 at 08:45 AM
Sean, you'll get the first t-shirt!
Posted by: Marissa | February 07, 2008 at 09:18 AM
Sean,
As long as we're indulging in mutual admiration, Harriot in Cuba took a look at your Monday Fox13 appearance and thought it was the most entertaining thing she'd seen in a long time. She's predicting big on-air things for you!
However, she was dismayed you didn't talk about her favorite SB commercial, the Bud Light "Wine & Cheese Party" spot.
"Goin' on a cheese run!"
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 07, 2008 at 09:54 AM
I'm seeing a future for "Fun with Sean and Jane", a program where we try to one up each other with our many pop culture references, relevant or not; ramble on endlessly; and spontaneously burst into song at any given moment.
Posted by: jane | February 07, 2008 at 10:10 AM
Tell Harriot in Cuba I said thanks. Despite the fact that my jowls look extra-Jabba-esque in HD, I love doing TV. It's probably not a bad investment for the future, either.
"Fun with Sean and Jane"! It's like Donny & Marie with even more sequins and sexual tension. I smell ratings bonanza.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 07, 2008 at 12:46 PM
I love sequins and sexual tension!
And in a total homage to the glorious genius of the Dean Martin Show, there will be constant drinking while filming.
Ratings bonanza indeed.
Posted by: jane | February 07, 2008 at 01:14 PM