IDOL RECAP: And Then There Were...20?
ONE OF US! ONE OF US! American Idol eliminated its first four losers Thursday -- 2 boys, 2 girls -- ejecting them back into the cruel sobriety of everyday life. I predicted the exit of Luke Menard and David Cook, and Amy Davis and Joanne Borgella.
Was I right? Kind of...
GOODBYE #1: GARRETT HALEY: Leif-ing so soon? Tiger Beat '77 getting the boot early is a bit of a surprise. I thought his Breck hair would keep him alive awhile.
GOODBYE #2: AMY DAVIS: Nothing like getting ushered into oblivion with life advice from Paula Abdul. Yeah, that oughta work. Maybe if Amy does the opposite, she'll become president or discover a cure for the common cold.
GOODBYE #3: JOANNE BORGELLA: Here's my theory: JoBo wasn't plus-sized enough. Had she been morbidly obese a la Mandisa or Ruben or LaKisha, she woulda been rocking the Ford commercials. Per usual, I blame salads for all the sadness in the world.
GOODBYE #4: COLTON BERRY: At last, Colton can go back to being Thom Yorke's brain troll. Godspeed, lil' Yorkian homunculus. In related news, how ticked is that nerd Kyle? Didn't he lose out to this gnome?
Sean Daly is the pop music critic for the St. Petersburg Times. His CD collection -- from Journey to Dylan, Prince to U2, Public Enemy to Stan Getz -- is much bigger and better than yours.
Any guesses on what song they'll use for the "so long sucker! you didn't rock the house or America with your yelping disguised as singing"
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 06:21 PM
This year's So Long Sucker song?
It's this tune by this guy...
http://www.myspace.com/ferrasmusic
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 06:27 PM
Okay, judging just by his photos on the site, I would expect something edgy and hardcore. Then, I clicked the player: He's the vocal equivalent to a flacid pen*s.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 06:40 PM
How do you really feel about it, Miss Riss... heh.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 06:52 PM
I figured my comment would make up for the lack of edginess in his voice lol
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 06:56 PM
WOW Riss... don't hold back on us!! LOLOLOLOL!!
Posted by: Carla | February 21, 2008 at 07:06 PM
Hey Riss,
Batter that than the p*nis equivalent of Luke Menard's voice!
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 21, 2008 at 07:47 PM
Did Paula borrow the hair piece from David Spade in Joe Dirt? That's just dreadful.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:03 PM
I just turned it on. More filler than in the food storage area at Busch Gardens.
That's my cue to half-watch and do other stuff.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:08 PM
Amanda looked like she wanted nothing to do with the whole group singing thing. And Danny (the pouty little bee-otch) looked like he was doing something dirty with his microphone.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:10 PM
OK, jamming all 24 of them on the stage at the same time isn't helping me tell them apart.
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 21, 2008 at 08:10 PM
Oh, the did a very nice close up of our LK. I could have done without the other 23. What was with the token, "yeah yeah" from Ms. Overdyer?
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:11 PM
Wow, that montage made Up With People look like Ozzfest.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 21, 2008 at 08:12 PM
lol Bassnote. I want to know what they did with Colton's hair. They must have caught on to me calling him the semi-albino. His hair is darker and flinging upward with a Flock of Seaguls flip.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:13 PM
Damn -- looks like I missed something. I love cheesy group sings! Off to roll back the DVR.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:13 PM
When did Kid Rock become a contestant on this ship of fools? Good grief.
This is a glorious, glorious trainwreck.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:15 PM
Aww that was quick and painful! Daggum!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:17 PM
Dang, I kinda sorta feel bad for him. Sorta. In a motherly way. Dont' you think they could have offered to wax his upper lip tonight?
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:19 PM
Oh, Jane, don't dis the Rock ...
Worst part of American Idol: Having to watch the losers sing again!
Posted by: Jan Wesner | February 21, 2008 at 08:19 PM
Leif bites the dust quickly, let's hope Danny Montana follows.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:20 PM
I'm wishin' and hopin' for Colton. I just don't like that kid. Maybe he'll grow on me like fungus on cow doody.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:21 PM
It was the peach fuzz moustache that did Leif in.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:21 PM
Oh, Jan, I'm not dissin' the Rock. It's just that Robbie Carrico in that fedora bears a striking resemblance to Mr. Ritchie.
Poor little Garrett. Aw. I'm a bit maternal towards him as well. Peach fuzz and all.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:22 PM
OK, you are right about Robbie Carrico. I didn't hear him sing last night. How awful was he?
Posted by: Jan Wesner | February 21, 2008 at 08:25 PM
Uh, that teeny clip of Amanda Overdyer just scared the bejeezus out of me. I want my mommy!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:27 PM
Amy was no big surprise.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:29 PM
Ouch! Mute button, please.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:30 PM
Not Amy!
I mean, eventually Amy, but first glean out a few of the blonde twinkies so I have half a chance to tell them apart!
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 21, 2008 at 08:31 PM
Goodbye, Amy Davis, Model and Grad Student. I shall not miss you.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:32 PM
That first chiquita up there looked exactly like a Fembot with her gynormous hair piled up. lol
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:32 PM
I wonder if they might let Michael sing just for the thrill of it. I mean, seriously. C'mon!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:34 PM
Paula's song makes me wish there was no tomorrow.
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 21, 2008 at 08:37 PM
The thing I notice most about this song, is that if there was no pro-tools and digital effects, it would sound even worse.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:39 PM
I loved seeing Randy badonkin' on the geetar. lol
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:40 PM
Sean is chiming in up above with his updates. Sean, we know you're out there!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:42 PM
And then there's Maude... What was Amanda wearing?
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:46 PM
Sean was right about Joanne.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:47 PM
Crap.
All the blondes are coming back.
Maybe Jeff Corwin can put tags in their ears so I can tell them apart.
Can't be any worse than those hula hoop earrings they've all been wearing.
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 21, 2008 at 08:47 PM
Why was that twinkerella crying? Relief that she's not the cast off? Jeez!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:49 PM
I'm disappointed too Jeff, I wanted to see at least one fembot go.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:49 PM
Ok.. my pet-peeve with the first 4-6 episodes of AI, after the voting has begun, is the FAKE@SS tears the contestants who didn't get the boot shed. Like they are so upset that SOMEone got voted off.... PLEASE, it's more like, THANK GOODNESS it wasn't me!
Posted by: Carla | February 21, 2008 at 08:50 PM
Perhaps they can wear sweaters like they did on the old Mickey Mouse club.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:50 PM
Drat -- bye-bye gorgeous Joanne. Hello again, Fembots. Perhaps they're all still around because people weren't sure which was which when they were voting and just gave up.
And what was with Ramilie and all the tears. Good lord, it's only elimination day #1.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:51 PM
I'm going to go watch Love Kangaroo on my blog.
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:52 PM
WOOT! Personal victory for Miss Riss!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:55 PM
Actually, it looks like Morticia Addams raided Maude's closet and then dressed Amanda.
"Lady Godiva was a freedom rider." *snap snap*
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:55 PM
Chick-filet lives to hit the craft services table for another week.
No big surprise.
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 21, 2008 at 08:55 PM
Chikezie can't sit down because he just made a pooh-pooh in his pants
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:55 PM
I thought it would be Chikeezee.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 08:57 PM
So Colton goes home. Hoo-frickin-ray.
Chikese better count his blessings.
Posted by: jane | February 21, 2008 at 08:57 PM
ugh. the tears
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 08:59 PM
Ya know who should sing Suspicious Minds? Oh yeah... Did you see MJ just dying to bust out in song!? Go on.. rip that microphone from his hands, baby. Sing it..unhuh lol
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 09:00 PM
Maude! Very funny. I was trying to peg that sweater.
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 21, 2008 at 09:06 PM
WOOT! I made Sean laugh. Dig it!
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 09:08 PM
And The Young Republican dude DID lose out to Colton (against Simon's wishes, however).
Posted by: Marissa | February 21, 2008 at 09:10 PM
The Young Republican would have lasted longer.
Posted by: Bassnote | February 21, 2008 at 09:21 PM
I heard a rumour
Ooh, ooh, I heard a rumour...
Next week's theme: The '70s
Week after that: The '80s
Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.
Posted by: jane | February 22, 2008 at 06:31 AM
Jane,
I don't know what concerns me more, that AI is on a crash course to trash the music of my favorite decade, or that Barry Manilow's juggernaut of decade-themed discs will soon march Sherman-like through the 80's catalog.
Posted by: Jeff in Cuba | February 22, 2008 at 10:00 AM
Both are grim scenarios, Jeff. However, while the AI '80s party train will only last for a couple of nights, the Manilow disc is a longer-term nightmare.
Mr. Kurtz had it right: The horror. The horror.
Posted by: jane | February 22, 2008 at 10:10 AM
ok, i just wandered in here by accident. so, let me get this straight. you spend 5 hours watching a show you can't stand, and then come here and spend more hours basically IM'ing each other about how bad it all was. for the SP Times readers, um...entertainment? SAD!
Get. A. Life.
Posted by: Maude | February 22, 2008 at 02:47 PM
"Wandered in here by accident"? Yeah, uh-huh, sure. We'll see you next Tuesday, Maude.
One of us! One of us!
Posted by: Sean Daly | February 22, 2008 at 04:44 PM
"...and then there's Maude!" I'm getting a lot of use from that theme song. Thanks!
Posted by: Marissa | February 22, 2008 at 06:38 PM