An "Idol" Rant from the Office Crank

Here's a piece from my good buddy Kyle, a beloved curmudgeon. It's nasty.

"I can't stand American Idol."

Agree? Disagree?

Comments

[Marissa]

Well, obviously I'm more than disenchanted with the turnout last night. ::coughriggedcough::

I made a statement on myspace about being p.o'd at Roo's ousting. A friend, who is drooling over Alien-baby Cook, replied with, "BOOHOO! I'm not sad ... David Cook all the way to win!!" Ironically, she's a huge DAUGHTRY fan and refused to watch last year because she felt it was fixed.

Roo, according to the interview on My Fox Chicago, has a friend who plays for the Cubs. Good news is they've asked him to sing the 7th Inning Stretch sometime this summer. I guess it's time for me to become a Cubs fan and finally visit Wrigley.

I, of course, therapeutically blogged about it last night. I'm fine. But my snarkometer is on full throttle now.

[Sean Daly]

Sorry I couldn't be more consoling last night, Marissa. I already had two crying ladies to deal with, one on each hip.

[GlennS.]

Your good buddy Kyle is my new hero.

I've never understood what all the fuss is with American Idol. I've heard all the arguments about why I should watch it.

"But Glenn, you love music." Exactly. I love it enough that I don't want to see it reduced to a dog-and-pony competition heavy on covers of songs that were overexposed years ago.

"But Glenn, you should at least watch the first few weeks, when the really bad singers are on. It's so funny." Oh yeah, there's nothing funnier than seeing someone's hopes and dreams dashed with a few cutting (but oh so clever) sentences. Would Bob Dylan have made it on this show? If that's too extreme an example, how about Donald Fagen from Steely Dan?

Worst of all is the way this thing just takes over the media (including, um, certain blogs...) Enough!

[jane]

Kyle's got some really valid points. Many with which I agree.

But much like that woman who clings embarrassingly to her youth long past its expiration date, I still find myself inexplicably drawn to our national trainwreck. Oh, how I wish I knew how to quit you, AI. At least I'm not mad dialing to vote anymore. That should count for something.

[Al]

I agree with Kyle and Glen.

Enough is enough......but America loves train-wreck TV. I actually feel myself becoming less intelligent if I turn on American Idol.

Maybe they should give Simon some grenades?

[Marissa]

Sean, it's quite all right. I've learned over 8 years of being a single chick how to deal with situations such as these. I appreciate the sentiment, however.
Life goes on, laaaa

And Glenn, isn't better the media take over this sort of program rather than, say, a presidential election? Just sayin'.

[Kyle Kreiger]

Mybe one of these days Toto, the '70s and '80s band, not Dorothy's dog, will pull back the big curtain and reveal the little "wizard" who has Idol fans mesmerized.

[GlennS.]

Marissa, regarding the media taking over presidential elections, a lot of folks I know would say that happened a long time ago.

[Marissa]

I suppose I needed to add "in comparison to influencing presidential elections" -- I was in a rush to hang up easily wrinkled items from the dryer.

[Jeff in Cuba]

WARNING: DIATRIBE AHEAD!

Asking if 'American Idol' is good or bad is like asking if a hammer is goods or bad. If you're looking to drive some nails, it's good; if you're looking to clean your teeth, it's bad.

AI is merely a tool, a pop culture mechanism. How people use that tool within their lives tells the real tale.

Kyle hits on a couple of things I would agree amount to "misapplications" of the AI product.

1) It is not a crucible of musical talent, at least not anymore. Its own pop culture impact now overshadows the medium (music) it once purported to serve. Few musical "idols" are being launched; most AI winners hit the zenith of their fame while they are still on the show.

2) It's not even an entertaining competition. The "judging", originally percieved as a performance indicator, is now recognized as merely a part of the show's structure, no different than the opening credits or the sappy farewell montages. Similarly, the voting has become disassociated from the performances, and is a stand-alone show element. "Voting" for Jason Castro isn't much different than "voting" for '32' at the roulette table.

So what is the appropriate way to incorporate the AI juggernaught into a well-balanced lifestyle?

Damned if I know.

But I will say this: I think the Pop Life Snark Brigade is pretty close. If 100,000 people want to open themselves up to public display, then why not take them up on the deal with some public comment. Saddling them with derisive nicknames and hyperbolic criticism is certainly a more egalitarian proposition than similarly treating friends and neighbors.

So to finally connect the dots on my intial premise: American Idol as an element of musical development and appreciation? Bad. American Idol as a harmless scratching post upon which we can claw away at the things that drive us nuts? Pretty damn good.

[Marissa]

yeah, what Jeff said.

[DoctorDrew]

I fail to understand these types of reactions.

In my view, diatribes like Kyle's stem from frustrations that the things he fancies are not popular. So, for some twisted reason lashing out at the current popular show or band or movie makes them feel better.

[self edited -- remainder deleted]

[Marissa]

OK, I gotta add a little summin' more. What harm is caused by watching such a program and humorously commenting on the performers, judges, guest performers, etc? Are we causing a recession? Does watching it cause cancer? Nope.

So, maybe last night's elimination show gave me heart palpitations, but other than that no one gets hurt. And we all get to express ourselves with snark. It lets off steam from spending the day trapped in hyper-political correctness mode.

I can't, for the life of me, understand why people watch Nancy Grace. But I let it end with that simple thought.

I feel better now. Thanks.

[GlennS.]

Jeff, you haven't quite talked me into becoming an AI fanatic, but I thought your argument was well-considered and articulate.

If watching and discussing AI keeps people from being snarky or worse to their friends and neighbors (who just might be you or me) then by all means they should stay tuned.

And Marissa, you have my sympathy. Laundry day is far worse than any TV show.

[DoctorDrew]

Exactly Riss.

You like what I don't; I like what you do not. (If I have time, I might peek and see if I'm missing something. If I don't enjoy it, so be it.) I don't slam the program and those who enjoy it.

[Old Fat Bald Chick Magnet]

The problem is that the "Idol" mentality is pervading the broader culture. You can't go to a ballgame any more without some wannabe adding fifty extra notes to the National Anthem. Every kid thinks she has talent, and no mom wants to be the voice of reality. Try managing one of these Idolettes in her first job and tell me the problem isn't critical.

[Marissa]

Well, that fifty note in one BS has been going on longer than idol. I blame the likes of Whitney, Christina, Jennifer Holiday etc... for that mess.

[Old Fat Bald Chick Magnet]

You're right, Marissa..but still. Maybe it seems worse because I'm older and crankier, if that's possible.

And hey, don't forget Reba McIntyre. I'm pretty sure she started that hideous style.

[Marissa]

ewwww I forgot about Reba. She does do that 20 notes crammed into 1 bit with a twang. Blech.

[NickWithAnAxe]

In a word?? Dreadful. Terrible. Mind-numbing. Wait, that's 4 words.

I've never understood the sensation that is "American Idol". To me it's like humping a cheese-grater, only without the payoff.

I'll pass, knowing that Daly is watching for all of us.

[Old Fat Bald CHick Magnet]

Impressive Ralph Cifaretto reference, Nick! Or is that particular activity more common than parts of me want to think about?