The Changing Table Playlist

Dear Busch Gardens,

I recently took my daughters to your theme park. We were having a swell time with your rides and attractions — until I had to take my youngest, apparently the victim of too much popcorn, to the restroom, a men’s room to be exact. Mai-Mai is 21 months old, which means (1) she still wears a diaper but (2) she fills that diaper as if she were a midsized African elephant, an animal with which you’re quite familiar. So imagine my surprise, Busch Gardens, when I discovered that your diaper changing table in said lavatory was not only wobbly (Mai-Mai thought it was another ride -- wee!) but that it was, inexplicably, a solid 15-yard touchdown strike from the nearest trash receptacle.

So as Mai-Mai, in my left hand, tested the not-so-strength of your changing table — boing! boing! — I pondered the ghastly diaper bomb in my right hand. My options were scant: (1) Heave ho the Huggie, a perilous toss to the ridiculously far trash can to be sure or (2) drop the diaper to the ground, which I did. Alas, upon hitting the floor, the elephantine diaper flapped open, revealing the horror to a father and son, who recoiled as if faced with an army of flesh-eating zombies. I then put Mai-Mai down so I could deal with the offending diaper; my youngest daughter instantly woddled to a urinal and started splashing around -- wee!

In closing, Busch Gardens, this playlist is for you:

Changes, David Bowie
Diaper, Meat Puppets
Blow Out, Radiohead
Hot Mess, Ashley Tisdale
That Smell, Lynyrd Skynyrd
Wiggle Wiggle, Bob Dylan
Move It on Over, Hank Williams
Daddy’s Girl, Peter Cetera
Throwing It All Away, Genesis
Baby Elephant Walk, Henry Mancini

The Stephen King Playlist

 

After four weeks of counting down the grisliest, ghouliest Halloween hits, I was ready to move on to a brighter, happier playlist. The Baby Feet Playlist, perhaps. Or maybe the Puffy Unicorn Stickers Playlist. But then I received the most awesome PR email in the history of PR emails. On Nov. 16, in a rare public appearance, Stephen King will speak at Sarasota’s Van Wezel Hall. You can go to http://www.vanwezel.org for tickets, and read all about it in the Critics Circle blog. But make sure to save a ticket for me. Along with Mark Twain and John Irving, King is my preferred man of letters, a populist with vampire fangs. It shouldn’t have taken late-career endorsements by The New Yorker and lit critics to confirm his standing, but the more the merrier, I guess. I always tell new King readers to start with Misery and Night Shift; save The Stand for the long, hot summer of your 16th year. Anyway, let’s celebrate the arrival of the macabre master, whose new novel, Under the Dome, will be published on Nov. 10. I used the Ramones’ Pet Sematary for our Halloween rundown, but here are 10 other cuts nodding to King novels. See ya in Sarasota, Constant Readers.

Christine Sixteen, Kiss
Talisman, the Guess Who
Miss Misery, Elliott Smith
Firestarter, the Prodigy
Tower of Song, Leonard Cohen
Carrie, Europe
Desperation Samba, Jimmy Buffett
Stand, R.E.M.
From a Buick 6, Bob Dylan
The Shining, Badly Drawn Boy

'Suckin' It for the Holidays'? An exposed Kathy Griffin leads a barrage of Christmas albums

On the list of people you never want to find under the mistletoe, you gotta rank Kathy Griffin up there pretty high. Like maybe right after Dick Cheney but ahead of, like, everyone else in the entire world, living or dead. But maybe that's me? Maybe you have no problems with this album cover, on which the comedienne is presumably exposing her naughty bits to an unfortunately situated St. Nick?

Griffin's wistfully titled holiday disc, Suckin' It for the Holidays, is one of myriad Santa season discs stacked high on my work desk right now. I'm currently listening to the soundtrack of A Christmas Story, which is just now being released 26 years after the movie's release. Ralphie's flick isn't famous for its music, but it's sweet and funny and engrained in our DNA, so kudos to the folks at Rhino for finally putting it out there.

Here are the other new holiday albums I'll be working through:

Bob Dylan -- Christmas in the Heart
Sting -- If on a Winter's Night
Neil Diamond -- A Cherry Cherry Christmas
Michael McDonald -- This Christmas
Sugarland -- Gold and Green"
Tori Amos -- Midwinter Graces
REO Speedwagon -- Not So Silent Night
Connie Talbot -- Holiday Magic
The Dan Band -- Ho
Various Artists -- Putumayo Presents A Family Christmas
David Archuleta -- Christmas From the Heart

It's the Bob Dylan Christmas album! Out today!

Wow...just...wow.

Wolfmother, Weezer and a Whole Lotta Lambert: 10 cool fall album releases

As well as being Jerry Lee Lewis’ 74th birthday — go get ’em, Killer! — next Tuesday kickstarts what could be a very cha-chingy season of music sales. Mariah Carey, Madonna and Barbra Streisand all have new platters out on the same day, and much hullabaloo will be made about that. (Look for Mimi’s Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel to top Madge’s Celebration and Babs’ Love Is the Answer at the cash registers.)

I’m much more excited about other goodies on the fall schedule. So here you go, SD's Ten Most Intriguing Autumn Albums:

Miranda Lambert, Revolution (Sept. 29) First single Dead Flowers is way too tame for this crossbow-totin’ country gal. But here’s hoping Ran terrorizes a couple of exes before she’s done.

Karen O and the Kids, Where the Wild Things Are (Sept. 29) I have squishy feelings about Spike Jonze’s big-screen take on Sendak’s classic. But having the Yeah Yeah Yeahs bizarress — and Jonze’s gal pal — do the soundtrack is daring. “Let the wild rumpus start!”

Bob Dylan, Christmas in the Heart (Oct. 13) Zimmy’s late-career Bing Crosby fetish reaches its peak. Positively 34th Street?

Daryl Hall & John Oates, Do What You Want, Be What You Are (Oct. 13)  A 4CD set of Philly soul, FM bliss and final proof that Oates never should have shaved the ’stache.

Weezer, Raditude (Oct. 27) With the help of unlikely hip-hop pals Jermaine Dupri and Dr. Luke, awesomely unstable Rivers Cuomo continues his search for the perfect power-pop formula.

Wolfmother, Cosmic Egg (Oct. 27) After shedding his old mates, Aussie hairball Andrew Stockdale forges on with three dudes well-versed in heavy metal, Led Zep and puffy unicorn stickers.

Various Artists, Glee: The Music (Nov. 3) From Journey’s Don’t Stop Believin’ to Kanye West’s Gold Digger, Fox’s hit show about losers in tune takes pop hits and reinvents them with robust choral cheek. In a related note: Isn’t it time the great Jane Lynch won an Emmy?

Carrie Underwood, Play On (Nov. 3) True confession: I gave Underwood’s 2007 album Carnival Ride a D grade. Two years later, I have four songs from that disc on my iPod. I will never underestimate the Nashville nymph’s seductive powers again.

Norah Jones, The Fall (Nov. 17) With her opium-haze voice and toasty piano style, Miss Jones walks that tricky tightrope between lulling and numbing. The good news — well, for us at least — is that this one is a break-up special with angry guitar.

Adam Lambert, TBD (Nov. 24) In the new ish of Rolling Stone, there’s a wicked shot of  last year’s AI runner-up howling in the recording studio. Sweet! We want our Lamby to raise a hellhound ruckus on his debut disc. Bring the noise, baby!

Bob Dylan Christmas album out Oct. 13

Bob Dylan rasping out The Little Drummer Boy? I'd totally pay for that! On Oct. 13, the one and only Zimmy will release the album Christmas in the Heart, proceeds from which will benefit the hunger-relief charity Feeding America. No info on Bob's band, but other holiday faves will include Here Comes Santa Claus, O Little Town of Bethlehem, Winter Wonderland and the frisky Must Be Santa. Between his old-time radio show and his late-career Americana croon experiment, this should complete Dylan's secret desire to become Burl Ives.

The Lunch Lady Playlist

Most Tampa Bay kids head back to school on Tuesday. This includes my 5-year-old, who’s boarding the rocket ride known as kindergarten. The other day I asked Lulu what she was most excited about: new friends, teachers, books? “Lunch,” she said. Lunch? “Yeah, lunch. In the cafeteria. You know, by a lunch lady!” For a second there I was tempted to tell her about Pizza Day 1978, that history-rich moment in time when her dad, then just an unsuspecting third-grader, found a thick clump of black hair buried within his lunch-lady-crafted slice of pepperoni. But I didn’t. Life is about to get very exciting for my daughter — why taint this brave new world? So to usher Lulu off to Big Girl school, here’s the Lunch Lady Playlist!

Gotta Serve Somebody, Bob Dylan
Meat, Phish
Hot Potatoes, the Kinks
Burnt Biscuits, Booker T. and the MGs
Milk, Kings of Leon
Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm, Crash Test Dummies
Yummy, Gwen Stefani
Can I Have My Money Back?, Gerry Rafferty
Girls Just Wanna Have Lunch, “Weird Al” Yankovic
Home Cookin’, the Animals

Peeping Bob? Dylan gets nabbed by fuzz snooping around Springsteen's old house

This is a weird little story. Bob Dylan was wandering through Long Branch, N.J., last month -- in the rain, no less -- when a 24-year-old Garden State cop detained him with a few curious questions. She had no idea who he was, but in her defense, can you imagine how suspicious and scraggly a sopping wet Bob looked?

Anyway, turns out Dylan might have been searching for the home where Bruce Springsteen wrote Born to Run. In the past year, the 68-year-old has also visited the former writing homes of John Lennon and Neil Young. You can read the full story HERE.

Photo courtesy of the Associated Press

SD's Top Record Shops in America! Amoeba, Daddy Kool, Shangri-La & more!

I recently spent a week in Baltimore, dealing with family stuff, desperate for sanctuary. Instead of turning to booze or crab cakes, I drove to Fells Point, on the harbor, and took solace at the Sound Garden, one of my fave record stores.

The place is a madhouse of vinyl, CDs, DVDs; your head will spin for the first 10 minutes inside. But it’s also absolute geeked-out nirvana, a cacophonous cocoon of music and Day-Glo price tags, of posters and album art. Charm City businessmen and tourists mingle with the inked and tattooed, and music, the great equalizer, is the only topic of talk. (If you’re wondering, I bought Bob Dylan’s Nashville Skyline on vinyl. $9.99. A bargain.) 
  
Anyway, that trip got me thinking about other safe havens around the U.S.A. So here’s a quick list of my favorite record shops.

* Amoeba Music, Los Angeles A slice of heaven in West Hollywood, this is your best chance to buy rare vinyl records next to Ben Stiller or Dave Grohl.

* Bananas Music, St. Petersburg One of the biggest record stores in the world — and yet most folks here have no idea how to get there. Give yourself a day to get lost in the stacks.

* Princeton Record Exchange, New Jersey I spent an hour in this mecca, then drove around the ivy-kissed campus listening to a used copy of Bob Dylan’s Pat Garrett & Billy the Kid soundtrack.

* Daddy Kool, St. Petersburg A block from the St. Pete Times building, I’ve burned many a lunch break — and paycheck — in this small but satisfying store.

* Melody Record Shop, Washington D.C. I spent nine ink-stained years at the Washington City Paper. It feels like I spent just as much time in this Dupont Circle staple.

* Generation Records, New York City I bought Dylan, ahem, "live recordings" in this Greenwich Village shop. You’ll never catch me, coppers!

* Shangri-La Records, Memphis, Tenn. There’s nothing like touring the soul-kissed Stax museum, then filling up a big bag with Otis Redding 45s. Bliss.

SD's Favorite Pop Soundtracks (or: Happy Anniversary, Purple Rain)

As a kid who loved both movies and music — not to mention conjuring suave cinematic fantasies of action, adventure and Christie Brinkley in a two-piece — I grew up with as many soundtracks in my collection as regular records. So with Prince’s Purple Rain turning 25 next week, it got me thinking about my other fave soundtracks, all 10 of which, no matter how old or weird, I still spin on the player all the time.

The Graduate (1967) Dave Grusin’s ripe cocktail swing puckishly frames the youthful freedoms of Simon and Garfunkel’s ethereal pop. April Come She Will gets me every time. (Fun Fact: The famous "leg" in the poster is not Anne Bancroft's. It's Linda Gray's. Yep, of Dallas fame.)

Superfly (1972) From the title track to Freddie’s Dead, Curtis Mayfield’s street serenade is sexy, cool and utterly terrifying.

Pat Garrett & Billy the Kid (1973) Bob Dylan’s foray into soundtracking includes Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door plus a soft, jingle-janglin’ saloon score. I bought this on CD at the Princeton Record Exchange, then played it in my crappy rental car as I cruised around campus. Total bliss.

Grease (1978) If we’re talking Travolta dance flicks, I’ll take the bawdy ’50s fun of Greased Lightning over Saturday Night Fever’s ’70s-sparkly Stayin’ Alive.

The Electric Horseman (1979) Willie Nelson owns Side 1 of this underrated gem, from his crackly take on the Allmans’ Midnight Rider to the bittersweetly spare Hands on the Wheel. Catch me at the right time -- say midnight, alone in my office, can't sleep -- and I'll tell you this is my favorite soundtrack of all.

National Lampoon’s Vacation (1983) As well as having hits by the Ramones and the Pointer Sisters, this fun, cheeky road-tripper is bookended by two great Lindsey Buckingham cuts: Holiday Road and Dancing Across the U.S.A. This sucker is pretty rare and rather expensive (at least on CD).

Some Kind of Wonderful (1987) For all the verbal zip of John Hughes movies, the director also had killer taste in music. This soundtrack stars ’80s one-hitters Flesh for Lulu (I Go Crazy) and Lick the Tins (a cover of Can’t Help Falling in Love). Sadly, Charlie Sexton's climactic Beat So Lonely (an extended version, no less) is not on here.

Pulp Fiction (1994) You could go with any Quentin Tarantino soundtrack and you’d be in happenin’ shape. (I was this close to picking Reservoir Dogs.) Still dig the surfy, switchblade licks of Dick Dale’s Misirlou kicking off the bloody party. 

Toy Story (1995) There are myriad reasons why Pixar has a winning streak unmatched in modern cartoonage. One of those is the reliance on big-hearted satirist Randy Newman to provide the music. Here he matches adult cynicism (Strange Things) with chummy tyke sing-alongs (You’ve Got a Friend in Me).

Slumdog Millionaire (2008) Composer A. R. Rahman’s Bollywood-meets-techno score, plus devilish help from Sri Lankan hip-hopper M.I.A., helped make this beat-mad soundtrack a crossover smash.